Rock Chick Meet Boybander
by Cylann
Summary: What happens when it is Jude, Tommy meets as a member of Boyz Attack and not Angie. Does he make the same choices?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

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Nothing Ever Goes Right

Darius Mills was in the middle of an important lunch with some distributors when he got the call. He wondered who would dare interrupt this important meeting. He had flown back to Toronto just to make it. He excused himself from the table and went to answer it.

"This better be good." He barked into the phone. He came back to the table, trying to hide his anger and agitation. One of the distributors asked him if everything was alright and he nodded, wondering where he was going to find an opening act right away. Apparently his boyband Boyz Attack had just managed to make their opening act Time Out quit. This was the 3rd opening act in 2 months. It had been a bad idea to go with another all male boyband as opening act, he realized. Too much testosterone and competition for the groupies and fan girls. The members of Boyz Attack had turned into such prima donnas.

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Looking For Something Different

"Hey Georgia how are things at G-Major?"

"Good Darius. What can I do for you?" He explained the need for an opening act.

"So do you have anyone available right away? Maybe a female?" All he needed was more testosterone on this tour.

"Um..Well..I'm not sure D."

"You have someone in mind don't you?"

"I do have someone about to kick off a club tour. I don't know if she'd go for it though."

"What?! Who would turn down opening for the hottest boy-band around? It's a stadium tour."

"I'm sure you can think of who it is. I'll even give you a hint. She hates your guts." Realization dawned on him.

"Jude Harrison. She was good, but rough from what I remember."

"Oh trust me D. She just keeps improving. If you don't believe me, she's got a gig at the Vinyl Palace tonight. Check her and her band Spiederman Mind Explosion out."

"I might just do that."

"Be warned D. She hates boy-bands and Pop music." Jude Harrison. He hadn't thought about her in a couple of years, not since she had broken up with his nephew Shay. Well she could definitely keep the testosterone overload down on tour. Look how she had handled Shay. She was also Punk, outside the scope of the normal Boyz Attack groupie. He couldn't picture her falling for any of his boys and they wouldn't know what to do with someone as real as Jude. This could be the perfect answer to his problem or the start of a new nightmare. At least he could go check her out. She could be looking for a new manager after all.

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Rock Goddess

He watched her on the stage, her hair was wavy now instead of straight, but still that crazy bright red. Her energy level as always was through the roof and her voice... He had never had a complaint about her voice. She was mesmerizing to watch, a rock star in her element. The chemistry with her band was also electric. He glanced around at the crowd and saw how into the music they were. Georgia was right, she had smoothed away the rough edges. And she would be perfect to join the tour. No way would she fall for one of the Boyz, which had been a problem with their first opening act. Brianna had been passed around like a piece of candy once Quincy had been through with her. Darius knew Jude was smart enough to be wary of any industry guy, especially after Shay.

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This is Good News?

Jude sat down in Georgia's office, wondering why the woman had summoned her. She had been busy at home packing for her new tour, when E.J. Had called saying Georgia had to see her right away.

"Jude I've got some great news. You're been offered a chance to open for a huge stadium tour." Jude opened her mouth in shock.

"No way! Who is it?! U2? Green Day?" Georgia looked a little less enthusiastic at this point, knowing her young protégé so well.

"Um...not exactly..."

"Who Georgia?" Jude was puzzled at why Georgia was so uncomfortable all of a sudden.

"Boyz Attack." Jude looked horrified for a second and then burst into laughter.

"Good one Georgia." She frowned when she noticed Georgia hadn't joined her in her mirth.

"I'm serious Jude. Darius is their manager and he saw you perform last night. He wants you and SME to join the tour right away."

"No...You've got to be kidding." Jude said in disbelief. Boyz Attack?! They sucked!, with their white jumpsuits and cheesy bandannas, shaking their ass to lame pop songs. To be honest she probably wouldn't have hated them so much if it hadn't been for her sister Sadie being so obsessed with them.

"Jude this is great exposure for you. Especially with your first album just coming out. You'll have a huge fan base to work with instead of the club tour we had planned." Jude bit her lip and frowned. It was true she wanted more people to hear her music, but this was beyond weird.

"Let me talk to the boys." Jude finally said. Georgia nodded.

"I really think you should do this. These people have deeper pockets than G-Major." Jude nodded to her friend and mentor before getting up to go find her band.


	2. Chapter 2

_I forgot to mention this in the first chapter, tommy is 19 and Jude is 17. I posted this story on DLS first so most of it is already done._

**Chapter 2**

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Get Over Yourself

The Boyz were practicing their dance moves when he saw the girl watching. Tommy didn't notice the smirk she was trying hard to contain. She had long wavy bright red hair and a slender body that curved in all the right places. She was wearing a small tight concert T and low tight jeans. He had been getting bored of all the girls that hung around them. They were all the same blond or brunette so willing to please. He could tell this was one was different. He stopped dancing and walked over to her, still eying her like a piece of meat.

"So do you like what you saw?" She glanced at him quickly, then looked past him, not saying anything. "You must be the new backup singer. What's your name?" He continued. Although she didn't really fit the type, she was attractive enough, with those big blue eyes outlined with liner. She rolled her eyes and finally spoke.

"Yeah...Um...I don't do backup for anyone." She walked past him, without answering his questions, heading towards Darius who had just come in with 3 boys about her own age. She joined them and they started talking. His band came up to him as he continued to watch the group.

"Who is she?" Sean asked, checking out the new talent. Tommy shrugged.

"You didn't even get her name?! Dude she shot you down, didn't she?" Chaz said gleefully. He had been jealous of Tommy ever since Tommy had started getting more attention from the fans than him. Darius looked up and waved them over to his group. Chaz eyed Jude with interest.

"Hey guys I'd like you to meet Jude Harrison and her band Spiederman Mind Explosion. That's Kyle Wally and Vincent."

"Spied."

"Spied." Darius nodded. "Anyway, they are going to be your opening act for the rest of the North America tour." Since when do girl's have bands? And what kind of music did they play anyway? They didn't look like any Pop act he had ever seen. Tommy wondered, as the boy named Spied put an arm around Jude's shoulders. "Don't make me have to look for another one." Darius said giving the Boyz Attack members each a serious look. He then proceeded to introduce them to the new members of the tour.

When everyone started to disperse Darius pulled Jude to one side.

"Did Georgia talk to you about the hair?" He asked, a little angry that his order had not been carried out right away. She looked mutinous, but finally nodded under his silent stare. "You're in the big time now Jude. This is a Pop tour. I need the fans to be able to identify with you, not some loner punk chick. I want to see your natural color back. Nadine will come find you later today." She nodded again still unhappy about being forced to do this. "Okay good. And remember don't get involved with the Boyz, especially not Quincy. It's more trouble than any of us need." Sadie had told Jude that Little Tommy Q had secretly eloped with Darius's sister Portia 5 months ago. She wondered if it was true. Sadie _did_ have a knack of finding out all things Boyz Attack. But then why would he be hitting on her? Of course with his reputation, cheating on his new wife would have been typical.

"Yeah like I'm about to fall for some talentless boybander..." She said sarcastically. Tommy happened to be walking behind the curtain near them when she said those words. What was wrong with that little...?!

"Jude be nice. You have to work with these guys for the next few months." Darius warned.

"Just not _too_ nice right?" She said mockingly and walked away to catch up with her band. Darius shook his head and had to smile.

* * *

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The First Time

Jude watched the enormous crowd from the side of the stage. The boys next to her looked equally nervous. _Breathe_. She thought to herself. _It's not that many people and they don't know who you are anyway. Wait is that a good thing? _A voice invaded her private panic attack.

"It helps if you picture them naked." She looked up and glared at the blue eyed man speaking.

"That is one of the stupidest things I've ever heard." She was so busy sniping at him, she forgot her own fears. Wally snorted and Spied coughed to hide his laugh. He put his hands up and shook his head, disgust showing on his face as he turned to walk away. She took a deep breath as she was introduced and walked on to the stage with a glint of determination in her eyes.

The blond girl looked terrified as she obviously went through an internal battle. This was the big leagues after all. They didn't call them stadium tours for nothing. Tommy remembered his first one and he had probably felt as scared as she now looked. When she had shown up that day, he had had to do a double take. He had a weakness for blonds and she looked damn good as one. The red hair had been intriguing, but the tousled blond was plain hot. He wasn't the only one who noticed either, his fellow band members definitely had too. She was wearing tight faded ripped jeans with a silver chain belt, black leather heeled boots and a black button down vest. A guitar pick hung from a cord around her neck, dipping into the vee of that vest. On her finger was a silver star ring he had noticed earlier and a black braided leather bracelet was around her wrist. He was enjoying the view as he walked up to her to try and calm her nerves.

Jude and SME walked off the stage sweaty and exhilarated. They had done it and they hadn't screwed it up. The fans had clapped, just like they were Jude's and SME's own. Once she had gotten on that stage, her nerves were forgotten, she had owned it. She realized it didn't matter what the size of the crowd out there was. The stage was hers from the first chord on her guitar.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

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T o Be Initiated

Jude and SME walked off the tour bus, shaking their feet a little. Jude tried to wiggle her toes to rub against the inside of her boot, to lessen the itching coming from it, but it seemed to make it worse. When Kyle proceeded to sit down right on the side walk and rip his sneakers off, they all knew something was up. He pulled his socks off and started scratching at his bare feet. They all looked at each other in growing realization, and then looked up at the Boyz Attack bus windows to see 5 heads staring down at them, laughing.

"You know what's better than getting mad?" Spied asked no one in particular. Jude had been around the boys long enough to appreciate a good practical joke.

"Getting even... Wally do you still have all that maple syrup we bought before we left?" Jude asked with a mischievous grin on her face, the glint in her eyes making Spied grin too. When Harrison had an idea, it was usually a brilliant one.

"I think there are a couple of bottles left. Why?" She motioned for them to get back onto the bus.

"We need a small funnel or one of those plastic syringes with the big plastic tip."

"I have one of those." Kyle volunteered and they all looked at him a little strangely.

"Dude do I even want to ask why you brought one of those with you?" Spied asked eying him and Kyle shrugged sheepishly.

While the buses had stopped for dinner than night, Jude and Wally had slipped onto the Boyz Attack bus. Kyle and Spied were acting as lookouts as the other pair put their plan into motion.

The following morning Jude and SME leaned against their bus and waited for the Boyz to make their exit from their bus. They walked out one by one, all of them with baseball caps on their heads. They were all scowling as they looked over at the other band. Jude crossed her arms and smirked at them, while SME were all laughing their asses off. She threw a tube of hair gel at Tommy and he caught it automatically.

"You might want to try something new on your hair." She gave him a little grin, and he glared back at her. It was a great prank he had to admit, not that he would ever tell any of them. Jude and SME watched as the Boyz quickly headed for the hotel, probably to the nearest showers.

The two groups soon settled into a groove. They were so different competition wasn't an issue, especially with SME being so goofy and laid back. The boys all hung out, went partying, drinking and played games. Of course the pranks continued.

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He Fell First

The buses stopped in a rest area and the two groups all got out. They were all sick of being cooped on their buses and were glad to walk around and stretch. Spied walked out with a football in his arm.

"Wanna play a little touch?" He called out to the Boyz Attack members. Everyone, but Bruno came over. He was a pacifist and didn't believe in competitive games, but strangely enough he was into weight lifting. Go figure.

"You guys are still one short." Chaz said.

"4 verses 4 man." Spied said confused.

"_She_ can play?" Chaz said a little condescendingly, indicating Jude who was busy stretching her arms, her concert tee riding up her belly. Spied gave a little grin as Jude turned and glared at Chaz

"Yeah we taught her the rules and everything. Just take it easy on her." Spied coughed.

They quickly got into their positions, the Boyz won the coin toss. After a few plays J.P. Threw the football towards Chaz who started to run for it. He felt someone slam into him and found himself on the muddy grass a little stunned.

"Sorry..." She said big eyes wide. "I must have slipped." She gave him a little smirk and reached over him for the ball. Jude got up, turned and wiped the mud off of her fine ass, his eyes followed the movement of her hands. He could only watch as she strolled back to her team, tossing the ball to Kyle. He looked over at his team and they were too busy laughing to notice him.

As the game progressed Jude found herself jumping for a wild throw from Wally. Tommy, who was a few feet away, saw her intent and the mud puddle she would probably land in. He didn't know what possessed him, but as her fingertips found the ball, his hands found her waist, attempting to catch her. Her momentum caused them both to fall onto the muddy grass, next to the puddle. She had landed half on top of him, his hands still on her bare waist. She could feel the tingle where he touched her. Amazingly enough the football was still in her hands. Jude turned and glared at Tommy.

"You _do_ know the rules of touch don't you?" She asked sarcastically and poked him in the ribs when he didn't let her go. He dropped his hands reluctantly and she stood up, ignoring him. The Boyz won the game, but barely and they were soon back on the road covered in mud.


	4. Chapter 4

_The song in this is Broken by Amy Lee and Seether. Please read and if you like the story review. It will make me post sooner. ENJOY! _

**Chapter 4**

_Not Now or Maybe Not Ever_

"Hey there. I finally get you alone." She looked up from her journal and gave a small tight smile, even though she was not happy at being interrupted.

"Hey." She looked down at her journal again hoping he would get the hint. He sat down next to her, just a little too close. She looked back at him and he had a small grin on his face.

"So Jude Harrison how are you enjoying your first tour?" She put her journal and pen down resignedly.

"It's been good. A lot to take in." He nodded with all the wisdom of his 19 years. She wanted to roll her eyes, but controlled herself. He continued talking about his experiences on tour, and she started to zone out, her thoughts back to the song she had been working on. He didn't seem to notice how quiet she had gotten. Anyone who really knew Jude, knew she wasn't the silent type. Her ears perked up when he mentioned Tommy's name.

"Hey I heard you dated Shay for a while." She nodded. "Did you ever meet his aunt?"

"You mean Portia? No..."

"She's a nice girl. I think you'd like her. You know she and Tommy got married? It's supposed to be all hush hush though. You know bad for the Boyz Attack image and all that."

"So why isn't she here?" She found herself asking, even as she kicked herself for encouraging him.

"She got offered the chance to do a 4 month design class in Paris. Big D wouldn't let her refuse it, even though she wanted to stay with Tommy. But enough about boring married couples." He gave her a smile that was supposed to be charming, but she found slightly plastic. "How about you and me grab a bite to eat later?" She tried to look regretful. She really did.

"Look Chaz you seem like a nice guy, but the thing is...I don't date industry guys. Things just get too complicated."

"Come on you can make an exception. I think we could have some fun together." He cajoled. He never took 'no' for an answer. She shook her head.

"I just want to concentrate on my music right now. I mean I'm just starting out and there's already so much to take in."

"Can we at least hang out as friends?" She didn't know how to say no to that.

"Sure of course." He would get to her, he knew. He had months to work on her and he could be patient when he wanted to be.

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Then You Found Me

It was about 11 at night when Tommy came back to the hotel. He had gotten bored at the bar, the girls holding no interest for him and just wanted to go back to his room. As he walked by one of the conference room's he heard music playing. Curious, he opened the door to investigate. This was one of the rooms the hotel had let them use to practice, so all the tables and chairs had been stacked to one side. She sat on the floor with a pen in her mouth, looking over a journal. Instrumental music he had never heard played on the laptop next to her. She took the pen out of her mouth and started to sing the lyrics to one part of the song.

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The worst is over now and we can breath again.

_I want to hold you high and steal my pain ...away..._

_there's so much left to learn_

_and no one left to fight_

_I want to hold you high and steal my pain_

She stopped singing and started to write again. Her voice had stunned him for a second. Here was a girl who didn't need gimmicks. He found himself walking into the room, even though he usually avoided her. She had never warmed up to him, had an unnatural dislike even.

"Hey." He said as he walked closer. She looked up her big eyes startled.

"You scared the crap out of me."

"Sorry...What are you doing here by yourself?" She sighed frustrated, as he sat down next to her.

"Damn Spied was supposed to help me finish this song, but he ran off with J.P. And the guys. Something about topless dancers. Now that I have it written and the instrumental done, it's driving me crazy that I can't do the vocals."

"Why can't you do the vocals? What you just sang sounded great." She gave him a small smile.

"Thanks...It's a duet actually."

"Can I help?" She gave him a doubting look. He knew he should be offended, but at least this was something different to do.

"It's not really your style..."

"How do you know what my style is?" He asked, irritation leaking through. She had judged him, the minute she had walked onto their tour.

"Right I don't... Well I guess it can't hurt if you want to try." She handed him the journal and pointed to his part. She played the instrumental on the laptop again, so he could hear it as he scanned the words.

"Got it?" She asked. He nodded and stood up, as she hit play again.

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(Him)

I wanted you to know that I love the way you laugh

I want to hold you high and steal your pain... away...

I keep your photograph; and I know it serves me well

I want to hold you high and steal your pain

Her eyes widened at his voice. He could sing?! And he was actually feeling the lyrics.

"How did that feel?" She asked when he stopped after his first part.

"Good...I think you should slow it down a little though.. It's supposed to be a rock ballad right?" She frowned, but went to the computer to try it out. He was right she realized as she ran through the lyrics mixed with the instrumental in her head. She replayed it with the change and they sang the chorus together.

_(Both)_

Because I'm broken when I'm lonesome

And I don't feel right when you're gone away

(Him)

You've gone away...

You don't feel me here... anymore...

(Her)

The worst is over now

And we can breathe again

I wanna hold you high and steal my pain...away...

There's so much left to learn

And no one left to fight

I want to hold you high and steal your pain

(Both)

Cause I'm broken when I'm open

And I don't feel like I am strong enough

Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome

And I don't feel right when your gone away

(Both)

Cause I'm broken when I'm open

And I don't feel like I am strong enough

Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome

And I don't feel right when your gone away

(Both)

Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome

And I don't feel right when you're gone...(Him) away...

They rehearsed it couple more times before making changes here and there. At one point he actually picked up her guitar and suggested a little chord change. She nodded her agreement, surprised again, that he could actually play an instrument. She made him sing it a few dozen more times and he hadn't complained. He asked her what the song was about, because it seemed so dark and sad. She told him how her best friend Jamie had lost his girlfriend Patsy in an accident 6 months ago. She had been driving drunk and run straight into a concrete bridge support. Jamie had been so torn up about not being able to help Patsy with her drug and alcohol problem. He had blamed himself for a long time.

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Friends With a Girl

Later on in the night after they had completed Broken they sat on the carpet, relaxing, energy drained, but in a good way. Water bottles were thrown all over the place.

"Can I ask you something?" She looked over waiting for him to continue.

"Why do you hate me specifically? I mean you seem to get along fine with the rest of my band now, so it's not the boy-bander thing. I mean what did I ever do to you? Ever since that first day..." She sighed and looked chagrined.

"You're right. I've been bitchy to you. I'm sorry."

"But why?"

"You'll think its totally lame." He just looked at her until she continued. "My sister Sadie has been in love with you since you sang your first cheesy song. She has all your posters on her bedroom walls _and _she plays your music _all_ the time. She sang Pick Up the Pieces until my ears bled. She can't sing." He started laughing. "You'd like her. She's a blond cheerleader Barbie, just your type." He eyed her and thought he liked a different blond type better.

"Wait Sexy Sadie and..." She interrupted him, before he could say the hated phrase.

"Don't even say it."

"Why? What will you do?" She glared at him. "Hey...Jude..." He sang. She tackled him to the carpet, straddling him, tickling him mercilessly. He caught her wrists and their eyes met. He rolled her off of him and hovered over her, leaning down to capture her lips. The merest brush sent, electricity dancing between them, before she rolled away from him, sitting up. She shook her head trying to clear it a little.

"I'm not doing this with you Tommy." He looked at her in puzzlement, a little frustrated she hadn't given in like every other girl he met. "Look. You've been great helping me out tonight. It's actually been fun hanging out with you and who knew you could really sing or play the guitar." She teased. "But... I'm not looking to be anyone's one night stand. I don't date industry guys anymore, especially not notorious players." That was fair, he had done things to deserve his reputation.

"So what _do_ you want?"

"I'd like it if we could be friends?" She suggested. Friends with a girl? He had never had one of those before, just ones he slept with and now an accidental wife. He _had_ had a surprisingly good time with Jude tonight and he had loved making music with her.

"I guess I could try the friend thing. What was that about dating industry guys anymore?" Jude turned a light shade of pink.

"I'm surprised D didn't tell you" Now he was intrigued. He knew there had to be a good story behind this. "A couple of years ago I was interning at G-Major before I got my contract and I met his nephew Shay." Tommy's eyes widened when he made the connection.

"Wait that was you? You're the girl who broke Shay Shay's heart?!" She rolled her eyes. Tommy agreed. Shay had always rubbed him wrong, maybe because they were too much alike.

"He cheated on me with that bleached blond bimbo Eden, who couldn't hit a high note if a cobra bit her on the ass. I don't know how he gets off playing the poor dumped boyfriend." Tommy understood why she wouldn't put herself in that position again. Jude apparently learned her lessons well.

"He did write that song for you." She snickered.

"I can't believe that hit #2." She had never thought Shay's music very original or inspired and he didn't usually write his own stuff.

"It's the image." She looked over at him and tried not to smirk, both of them knowing what she was thinking.

"So can I ask you a question?" He shrugged. "Do you ever want to do something different?" He had seemed to like working on this rock song with her a lot.

"You mean music wise?" She nodded.

"I've thought about changing our sound, but Chaz doesn't want to. Why mess with a good thing and all that. This pop crap is getting old." He admitted.

"What about going solo?" He looked over and found himself telling her truths that he had never told anyone.

"I've thought about that too, but I don't know...This is all I've known."

"Hey you've proved tonight you can sing."

"I don't know how my fans will like a different approach." Jude grinned.

"Well I've got an idea." She picked up the CD they had made, waving it in front of him. "Back home my friend Jamie interns at this small radio station. They have a open mic. block every Sunday. If a song that gets sent in is good, listeners call in and request it. So this is the perfect way to find out if people would like you without the bandanna." She smiled at him.

"But I'm under contract..."

"We won't tell anyone it was you."

"It's your song. You can do anything you want to, with it."

"Aww come on. You know you're curious." He shrugged as if he didn't care. On the inside he _was _a little excited about the whole idea. He didn't really think about the song again though until 3 weeks later.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

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Hilarious

Tommy walked off the stage, wiping the sweat off with a towel that had been thrown his way. He saw Jude and her boys sitting off to one side. She had tears running down her face, her eyeliner staining her cheeks. As he walked over she started laughing, until she started to gasp.

"What the hell did you do to her?" Tommy asked SME as he crouched down beside her. She looked up at him, her eyes focusing on his bandanna and started cracking up again. He watched her in a kind of sick fascination, as she alternated between laughing and wheezing.

"We..uh..had a bet." Kyle finally spoke up, still staring at Jude. "She lost."

"Yeah she didn't even make it past the first chorus." Wally chimed in.

"It...wasn't...the...music..." She wheezed, trying hard to catch her breath. "It...was...the butt wiggling!" She burst out, before she started laughing again, clutching her belly. Tommy glared at her.

"What was the bet?"

"She had to watch you guys perform an entire song with a straight face." Spied said, still staring at Jude in amusement. Was he supposed to be insulted? Hell yes. Was he supposed to be angry? Probably. So what did he do? He sat down and started laughing with her, surprising the hell out of SME.

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Let's Blow This Joint

Tommy went storming by Jude as he left the stage. They had had a sound check early that evening, and everyone had to be present even though the concert wasn't until the following night. She ran to catch up with him.

"Hey what's wrong?" He stopped to look at her, his angry glare softening the barest degree.

"Nothing... Chaz was just being an ass as usual. I'm getting out of here." He started walking again, leaving her standing there. "You coming?" He tossed over his shoulder. She followed him quickly. They left the arena and grabbed the first taxi they saw.

He started drinking at the first bar and grill they wound up at. Jude paced herself, only having one. He didn't speak much, but she finally got the whole story of why Tommy was so angry. Chaz had accused him of hogging the spotlight again. Apparently it had been part of an ongoing fight between them. He appreciated that she had left with him, even though he hadn't said it.

"I got a question for you Harrison."

"Yes?"

"Is there something going on between you and Spied?" Whenever he saw them together they seemed so close. She snorted in amusement.

"Are you jealous Quincy?"

"Why Harrison? Do you want me to be?" He teased back.

"Of course you should be. Everyone should want me."

"Oh they do..." He eyed her and gave her a look that made her skin warm.

"Spied and I aren't together." She said changing the subject, feeling a little nervous at his blue eyed gaze. He had the most gorgeous eyes, she thought. She snapped herself out of her reverie. "We tried it for a while, but decided we worked better as buds." If that was her definition of 'friends' maybe he had a chance after all. He took a long look at her wondering what it was about her that got to him. She was pretty, but there were plenty of nice looking women around. Her voice was amazing, but he had met other talented musicians. He took a long drink of his beer and contemplated the mystery of Jude Harrison.

She followed him to 3 other bars that night, having 1 drink to his 3. Jude was the first girl he had ever hung out with that hadn't demanded he share his feelings or asked that hated question: _What are you thinking?_ He wondered why women didn't seem to understand that men hated that question.

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Strawberry Fields Forever

The faint light of Dawn painted the inside of Jude's eyelids red. She cracked her eyes open, her head pounding and wondered where she was. She was lying on something damp and spongy. She turned and saw him, barely a breath away from her face. His eyes were still closed, and as she looked down she realized he was completely naked! She allowed herself one more peek before sitting up. Mmm he did look good. Maybe this would be a good birthday for once. She had made SME keep quiet about the usually disaster filled day. Then she realized she was only in a bra and panties. What the hell?! She wondered if they had done anything last night, but she was still wearing something at least and she didn't feel sore except for that pounding in her head. She looked for her clothes and saw them in a nearby pile. She got dressed quickly and spotted his clothes a few feet away.

They had been sleeping on the grass in some kind of park. What had happened last night? She vaguely remembered daring him to jump in a fountain? And her skin did smell faintly like chlorine. Nearby she saw a large round mosaic and realized where they were, her dad being a huge Beatles nut, obviously. Strawberry Fields Memorial. Tommy still hadn't moved. He had had a lot more to drink than she had. She wanted to laugh, but realized it would make her head hurt that much more. She wondered if she should wake him, but then thought better of it. SME and the Boyz had been playing pranks on each other for weeks. Tommy had orchestrated the prank the other night and Jude knew they would kill her if she let this opportunity go to waste. She didn't particularly like having a backup band with bleached blond (Wally), purple (Spied) and pink(Kyle) hair. Feeling only the slightest twinge of guilt, she gathered up his clothes and looked for the exit to the park. She caught a cab and was soon headed back to their hotel.

Tommy woke up an hour later to the buzz of voices and the morning sun beating down on him. He opened his eyes to see a group of Japanese tourists with cameras in their hands clicking away. He felt the breeze against his skin and it was then that he realized he was completely naked. He looked around in horror, not seeing his clothes or the blond that had been with him last night. He heard a few of them speaking his name. Oh shit! They recognized him. He stood up, trying to cover his man parts with his hands and one of the tourists tossed a I LOVE NEW YORK bath towel at him. He thanked him profusely and wrapped it around his waist. He tried to walk calmly past them out of the park. Their cameras still going, catching his retreating back with the word 'LOVE' centered on his ass.

He finally found a cabbie, only in New York, willing to give him a ride and got back to the hotel. He had only had to promise an autograph for his daughter. He wondered what had happened to Jude and his clothes. The cabbie was nice enough to pull onto a side entrance of the hotel where the buses usually parked. That's when he noticed the Boyz Attack bus had a makeshift flagpole on the roof and flying from the top of it, was a pair of boxers?! His boxers...He would have laughed if his head didn't hurt so much. At least he knew Jude had made it back okay. He went inside to bum some money from the hotel desk, to pay the driver.


	6. Chapter 6

_Here's the next chapter. I would appreciate some reviews if you like my story. ;)_

**Chapter 6**

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Oh Happy Joy?

Okay one more hour to go, and this day would be officially over. Jude thought happily. She would make it through without a crappy birthday for once. SME had taken her out for a birthday lunch since they had had a concert that night. She had gotten a yummy chocolate cake with strawberries on top and there had been no food fight though at one point she could see Wally had been tempted. It had been low key and perfect. The concert had gone smoothly and not once had she heard **the** hated song. She sat in the hotel lounge and strummed on her guitar, figuring out a new song.

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Your eyes are holding up the sky

You eyes make me weak, I don't know why

She couldn't seem to get his blue blue eyes out of her mind. The way he had looked at her last night had made her want things, that she couldn't have. She frowned as she worked on another chord variation. It was like he had radar or something, because as soon as she was lost in her music, he was standing there. At least it wasn't Chaz who had the knack of finding her. She looked up at him, her big eyes bright with merriment.

"So I see you found your way back."

"Yeah. Thanks by the way." They looked at each other, he gave short laugh at her smile and shook his head. "Remind me not to get on your bad side."

"Hey everyone says I'm nice..."

"You are many things Harrison. I'm not sure nice is one of them." She wondered what he meant by that.

"So what are you working on?" She shrugged as he sat down beside her.

"I'm not sure. I've got something, but it's not ready to come out."

"Can I help?" She pondered for a moment and picked up her guitar. She started to play something slow almost haunting, surprising him.

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If I was drowning in the sea

Would you dive right in and save me?

If I was falling like a star?

Would you be right there to catch me?

"If I was dreaming of your kiss. Would you look right through me?" He added and their eyes met.

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Games Don't Work For Me

He bent his head towards her, and she didn't stop him. She let herself indulge in the melding of their lips for the barest minute before she pulled away, reality finally intruding. There were so many emotions running through her eyes, he couldn't read them.

"Dammit Quincy do you have try to tap everything in skirts?!" He took a breath before he could answer, because that simple touch had made his pulse race.

"I've never seen you in a skirt." He joked weakly. Okay now they only emotion showing in her baby blues was anger. He knew that look well from the girls he had left after one night, and it had never phased him, but Jude was actually scaring him. It was like she was looking into his soul as her eyes examined his face. She shook head and started to mutter as she reached for her guitar.

"I should have known you didn't really want to be friends. You were just trying to get into my pants." She mumbled something about another crappy birthday to herself. That made him pause for a second. It was her birthday and she hadn't said anything? He grabbed her arm as she got up to leave.

"Jude wait." She stood still, but would not turn to look at him, so he moved to stand in front of her. "Hey I'm sorry." His voice was soft. Her gaze caught his as she finally looked up. "I've never been friends with a girl before. I guess just don't know how to do it. But I'm guessing kissing is out of bounds?" She gave him a small unwilling smile.

"I've dated friends before." A surge of hope went through him, before her next words brought him back down to earth. "But I don't do married guys Tommy. I told you that from the beginning."

"You said you didn't do players, nothing about married guys." She rolled her eyes.

"Um you just tried to hit on me. Doesn't that make you both?" He gave her an embarrassed look and shrugged helplessly.

"I am what I am..." She gave him a long look, as if trying to figure him out.

"No...You're more than that." What did she mean by that? He felt a weight fall onto his shoulders at her words, as he watched her walk out the door.

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We're Good

The next morning Jude heard a knock on her hotel room door, but when she opened it there was no one there. She looked up and down the hallway, but it was empty. On the carpet in front of her was a tabloid and a note attached to it. She picked it up and went back into her room, sitting on her bed.

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Hope this makes up for your crappy birthday.

The note wasn't signed, but she knew who it was from when she looked at the tabloid. She started to laugh as she looked at the two pictures gracing the front page. The headline was **BOYZ BARES IT ALL** The first was of a naked Tommy curled in the fetal position on the lawn at Strawberry Fields Memorial and the second was of his retreating back with a towel draped around his waist that had the word 'LOVE" centered on his ass.

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Fudgesicles on a Stick

As Jude finished her final song, she headed backstage, gulping the bottle of water thrown her way by a roadie. She had quickly become a favorite with all the crew, being one of the only females around. SME followed close behind, everyone happy, but exhausted as the adrenaline started to fade. The fans had been amazing, many of them had even learned the lyrics to their music. They heard the crowd chanting and stopped to listen before heading to their dressing rooms. '**Broken.**' and '**Tommy! Jude!**' Oh crap she thought as the boys listened with confusion. She had never told them that she had finished the vocals although they knew the instrumental having helped her record them before. Tommy rushed from his dressing room, alerted by Kwest. Their gazes caught and she shrugged helplessly.

"They're not going to calm down until we give them what they want." He said and took her hand, pulling her towards the stage, motioning for SME to follow.

"How did they know?!" Jude wailed. The crowd instantly quieted when they saw the two of them.

"You might want to ask your 'friend' Jamie that one." Tommy grabbed a mike and handed it to Jude and took one for himself. Although this wasn't the typical Boyz Attack style of music, the fans apparently loved it anyway. The music started and he began to sing his part. The fans went crazy when they heard his voice, even unaccompanied by cheesy pop music and dance moves. Jude joined in showcasing her amazing vocal range. They played it up for the audience, singing to each other, pretending at an emotional connection. This girl's voice had always awed Tommy, but tonight singing with him she was magnetic. He couldn't keep his eyes off of hers as he continued the song.

When they were done they held hands and bowed before heading backstage. The rest of Boy Attack were there dressed in their outfits, not looking happy at all. Jude squeezed his hand for support before letting go.

"You did good." She whispered in his ear before leaving him to confront his angry band members. Strangely enough her words of approval mattered to him.


	7. Chapter 7

_The song in this chapter is Lola by the Kinks. I hope you guys know what it is about, otherwise it isn't nearly as funny. Anyway ENJoy and REVIEW please!_

**Chapter 7**

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He's So Good At Demands

Jude and Tommy stared at each other as the man on the speaker phone continued to yell at them. They sat in the hotel conference room, where they had been summoned to take Darius's call the day after the concert. He had been going on for about 5 minutes and neither Tommy nor Jude had been able to get a word in. Tommy tapped his fingers on the table waiting for the man to finish and actually say something important. It's not like he had never been yelled at before. He had done plenty of things to push Darius's buttons, like elope with his sister. Jude pushed her chair back from the table and started to spin around, making Tommy laugh.

"What's so damn funny?!" Jude stopped turning and they both stared at the hated phone.

"Nothing D." Tommy finally said as Jude grinned at him. Darius continued to rant at them for being so stupid and how Tommy was ruining the Boyz Attack image.

"With all that being said. You two and SME are going to hit the studio on your first free day and record Broken."

"But D..." Jude protested. Their next free day was in Virginia and SME had been so excited to visit the King's Dominion amusement park. They were going to kill her.

"No buts! Georgia and I have agreed this needs to be released as a single right away while the fans still love it. We are going to at least make some money from this debacle of yours!" With that being said he hung up, leaving them to the loud dial tone.

"Who uses words like debacle? I'm glad he's not _my_ manager." Jude grinned.

"So why don't you like Darius anyway? Besides the obvious I mean."

"He made Shay break up with me. Said it was bad for the image to have a girlfriend."

"And Shay did?" She nodded. "What is he 5?" Jude had to laugh.

"That's what I said to Shay. After that he decided to ignore his uncle at least." Jude had been dying to ask.

"So how'd your band take it last night?"

"Chaz and J.P. Were pissed. Sean and Bruno really didn't care as long as nothing in Boyz Attack really changed."

"Is this a problem then?" He shrugged.

"What are they going to do? Kick me out of the band?" He said cockily, knowing of course that he was the favorite Boyz member. Jude rolled her eyes at him. "So did you talk to Jamie?"

"Yeah...Do you remember a guy named Leon Weisz?" Tommy thought about it for a minute.

"Name sounds familiar."

"Well apparently he's Jamie's boss. He worked with you guys as an engineer on your first CD?" Tommy nodded, remembering him now. "He recognized your voice and sound right away and put two and two together. He knew I was a friend of Jamie's and that I was touring with you. After that, other radio stations called him asking for a copy and here we are."

At the next concert the fans asked for Broken again and after that they decided to just add it to the show. They made the single pretty quickly already knowing how they wanted it to sound. Sean the producer had been surprised that Tommy and Jude had so much input into the song. Most artists didn't help in the production process much leaving it to him. Sean didn't have to do much, but clean it up a little. They let SME do the instrumental first so they could run for the park as soon as they were done. Tommy and Jude had stayed behind to do the vocals and help with the mixing. Jude had learned how when she had been an intern at G-Major and Tommy had picked up some of it over the years. They had both gotten lost in the music and hours had gone by without them realizing it. Jude had wanted to go to King's Dominion too, but making music with Tommy hadn't been bad either. Tommy admitted he hadn't been to a an amusement park in years. The fans having made it almost impossible to be out in public like that. Jude had never really thought about how hard fame could be sometimes.

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Bathroom Breaks

Jude saw him rounding the corner. Crap! She ran for the nearest door and as she opened it she ran straight into Tommy as he was exiting the Men's room. She pushed him back in in a surprising burst of strength and quickly joined him in the bathroom. As he started to speak she clamped her hand over his mouth and tried to listen for any noise from outside. He had the worst urge to lick her palm, but controlled himself. She heard Chaz's footsteps getting closer and the door began to swing open. She pulled Tommy into the nearest stall, locking it quickly and jumped on top of the toilet holding onto his shoulders for balance. He put his hands on her waist to steady her and mouthed 'Who?'

'Chaz' She mouthed back. She heard him starting to use the urinal and put her hands over her ears to block the sound. TMI. Tommy let out a chuckle making her glare at him. After a minute Tommy pulled her arms down and she heard the faucet running. They heard the door open and then squeak shut again and Jude let out the breath she had been holding. Tommy picked her up and placed her back on the floor. They pressed close as he swung open the stall door to let her out. He blocked the door before she could escape the bathroom.

"You know most girls chase after Chaz, not run when they see him." She blew on her bangs in frustration. Chaz tried to corner her constantly, even more so after the whole singing with Tommy incident and she was running out of excuses not to hang out with him. She even had SME run interference whenever they saw him focusing on her.

"He just..." She began. "He won't stop putting the moves on me. It's like breathing to him or something." Tommy started to laugh. "It's not funny!" She hit his arm. "He never takes a hint and just goes away."

"Did you tell him you weren't interested?" She rolled her eyes and gave him an exasperated look.

"Gee why didn't I think of that?" She said sarcasm dripping from every word. Truthfully Tommy had never seen Chaz show this level of interest in a girl before. There were always available fans after all.

"Wait. Is Chaz the reason half the crew thinks you're sleeping with your entire band?" She nodded, a little embarrassed.

"What? One boyfriend wouldn't have been enough? You had to have an entire harem?" Wally had gotten the bright idea to kiss Jude one day, when he saw Chaz coming and didn't have time to get Jude out of there. Then Kyle had been upset that he had been the only who had never kissed Jude. After that SME being SME took it over the top. They all got touchy feely whenever Chaz was nearby, but it didn't appear to work too well, because Chaz didn't really see them as competition. She explained the situation to him and he started to smirk.

"What you need is someone Chaz could really see you with." She raised her eyebrow at him.

"Are you offering to join my harem?"

"Oh you wouldn't need anyone else with me around." He said in a low husky voice as he gazed into her eyes. They stood like that for a moment before he remembered where they were.

"Come on. We should probably get out of here before someone comes in." As they walked out they ran into Kwest, who was one of the roadies, and Tommy's friend. He gave them a surprised look.

"Hey." Jude said before walking by him as if there was nothing strange, about her coming out of the Men's room.

"Hey." Kwest said as he gave Tommy an incredulous look, hoping what he was thinking was wrong.

"Get your mind out of the gutter man." Tommy punched his arm as he followed Jude. Of course it wasn't like Tommy had never pulled a groupie into the bathroom for an occasional quickie, but how could his friend think that of Jude? She was not that kind of girl.

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She Squeezed Me Tight

Spied walked into the room that was set up for hospitality and saw everyone sitting around as if they had been waiting for him. Jude picked up her acoustic and started playing a familiar classic tune. Spied's face began to turn crimson and he turned to glare at J.P. And Sean. Jude, Kyle, and Wally had gone out to the movies last night, while Spied, J.P. And Sean had gone to a club. Spied had had a very interesting night apparently. He had hooked up with this amazingly hot older woman, who had hit on him when he walked in the door.

"You told them?!"

Jude started to sing and everyone who knew the words joined her.

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I met her in a club down in old Soho

Where you drink champagne and it tastes just like cherry cola

c-o-l-a cola

She walked up to me and she asked me to dance

I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said Lola

L-o-l-a Lola Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

Well I'm not the world's most physical guy

But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine

Oh my Lola Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

Well I'm not dumb, but I can't understand

Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man

Oh my Lola Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

Well we drank champagne and danced all night

Under electric candle light

She picked me up and sat me on her knee

And said dear boy won't you come home with me

Well I'm not the world's most passionate guy

But when I looked in her eyes I almost fell for my Lola

Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

I pushed her away

I walked to the door

I fell to the floor

I got down on my knees

Then I looked at her and she at me

Well that's the way that I want it to stay

and I always want it to be that way for my Lola

Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

Girls will be boys and boys will be girls

It's a mixed up muddled up shook up world except for Lola

Lo-lo-lo-lo Lola

Well I left home just a week before

And I'd never even kissed a woman before

But Lola smiled and took me by the hand

And said dear boy I'm gonna make you a man

When they were done singing their eyes all focused on Spied for his reaction.

"You guys suck!" His face was still bright red and he walked back out the door listening to the sound of laughter.

"She really was hot..." J.P. Said to Sean who nodded. Even he hadn't known the amazingly hot older woman was anything other than she appeared.

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Interlude

They stood on the roof top of the hotel, overlooking the city. Another hotel and another city. They all seemed to blend together she thought. He had followed her up here after seeing her enter the stairwell. She was trying to catch the sunset again. The wind whipped at her messy blond hair. Her arms rested on top of the railing as she leaned down, staring at the park below, the waning sun casting shadows among the trees. He mirrored her position a couple of feet over. They stood there in a comfortable silence until her voice broke the quiet.

"Have you ever been in love?" She asked looking over at him.

"If I was I didn't know it."

"Not even Portia?" He shook his head. She wondered why he had married her, but did not ask. It wasn't really any of her business.

"Have you?"

"I don't know." Telling him the partial truth as she could feel herself falling for him, even though she had tried so hard not to. "I always thought it would be like that feeling you get when you're just driving and you realize the sun is about to set. Everything is cast in that soft golden glow. Things just look different, better somehow." She shook her head. "That must sound cheesy to you."

"No." He was entranced by that image. "Is that why you always try to catch the sunset?" Her profile was silhouetted by that same light she spoke of and he couldn't look away.

"It's not the same though. For that moment to really mean anything, you can't go looking for it. You just have to find yourself living in it." He wondered if they were still talking about the setting sun.


	8. Chapter 8

_SMUT WARNING!_

**Chapter 8**

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She Belongs To Herself

"Hey Chaz got a minute?" Chaz was sitting backstage, surrounded by Boyz Attack fans. He looked over at Tommy with irritation, but got up and walked over to him. Tommy nodded at his dressing room and they both entered shutting the door behind them.

"What do you want Quincy?"

"Do you have a thing for Jude?" Chaz smirked.

"Why do you care? Are you jealous?"

"Leave her alone man. She's not interested."

"What? You think she wants _you_?" Chaz said sarcastically.

"I know she doesn't want you." Chaz shook his head, in amazement.

"Don't forget Tommy. You're married." Tommy felt the anger rising. Chaz always knew which buttons to push.

"Just leave her alone Chaz." With that Tommy walked out.

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Honesty

Kwest watched as Tommy brushed off the two girls that had come up to them. Both of them could have been models they had looked so fine. Tommy and Kwest had run into each other after the concert and decided to grab a drink. He knew it was time to ask his friend the question that had been on his mind.

"T. What's going on with you and Jude?" Kwest asked as he took a drink of his beer.

"Nothing. We're just friends." Kwest snorted. Ever since Jude and SME had joined the tour Tommy had seemed less and less interest in the groupies they were constantly surrounded by. He still flirted with them, but it was like he was doing it on autopilot. Kwest hadn't really seen him go off with any one girl in a longtime. The only girl Tommy seemed to hang out with was Jude and when they sang together the chemistry was undeniable. There had also been that weird bathroom thing.

"I know you man. You can't be friends with a girl. You're falling for her." Tommy didn't respond to his statement, instead just took a long drink from his glass. "You can't do this. Darius will destroy you if you hurt his sister."

"It's not even like that." Tommy wondered who he was trying to convince, Kwest or himself.

"Jude's different man. She's a good kid, not one of your groupies."

"You think I'm okay with this? I meet the coolest chick I know. The one who gets me the most and I'm married to someone else."

"Leave her alone. If you care about this girl let her go."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because I think I love her." Tommy finally admitted, to Kwest and to himself. He took a long drink of his rum and Coke and thought about her, like he always did, while Kwest was simply stunned into silence.

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Hungry?

Tommy was walking by the vending area, as he saw her familiar figure. She was giving the candy machine a death glare. Her boot clad foot went up to kick it and he winced. She turned and saw him, her eyes looked desperate.

"Hey do you have any change on you? I'm freaking starving and that damn thing ate my dollar!" He had to give a small smile at the frustration in her voice.

"It's not funny. I haven't eaten since this morning and someone got into my Pop Tart stash." It was now almost midnight, so he felt a pang of sympathy. They had just gotten back to the hotel from their concert an hour ago. He grabbed her hand and she looked at him in surprise.

"Come on." He said, tugging her out of the alcove. "I'll buy you a burger." Her mouth started to water at the thought. She let him lead them out the side entrance, careful to check for lurking girls and a few guys too, now that Jude was starting to get recognized. Releasing Broken with Tommy had definitely helped raise her CD sales and her fame. It had actually beaten out a Boyz Attack song for #1 on the charts, making the tension between Chaz and Tommy that much worse.

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Turning Point

They ducked into the shop overhang laughing, knowing avoiding the water was silly as they were both already soaked through. It had started to downpour while they had talked inside the diner. What the pouring rain had left dry, the puddle splashed by the passing taxi had taken care of. He reached over and smoothed her stringy hair out of her face, wiping away the rivulets sliding down her soft skin. Her cheek leaned into his warm hand for a moment, his hand cupping her face and she looked up, their eyes catching.

She stepped closer as his hand dropped to her waist, the other one to the small of her back pulling her flush against him. He leaned down, she reached up and their lips met. He tilted his head to deepen the kiss and she responded without hesitation. Something about him made her respond differently to him than the boys she had kissed. Something about her lips drew him in like no other. An eternity passed, but too soon they pulled apart. Their breath was ragged as their gazes locked again. He took her hand and they walked through the pounding rain, back to the hotel. Neither of them said a word as they separated at the elevators, heading to their respective rooms.

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From First Kiss To First...Hello?!

She had dried off in the bathroom, changed and collapsed on top of the covers, for once not caring how many germs were on the comforter. She stared at the ceiling unable to stop thinking about, feeling that kiss on her lips. She had never felt like this about anyone before. It was almost too much, too intense. Sometimes she would catch him looking at her and she would fall into his eyes, forgetting to breath.

He heard the knock at the door and got up to answer it, clad in only pajama bottoms.

"Jude?" He asked sleepily. Her eyes were riveted on his muscled chest. She finally tore her eyes away knowing she was supposed to say something.

"Can I come in?" She said quickly. He moved so she could enter, shutting the door behind him. She perched on his bed.

"What's up?" He sat down beside her, wide-awake now at her proximity.

"That kiss tonight..."

"I know... It shouldn't have happened. I'm sorry." He said exasperated, not really believing his own words for a minute. He had been fighting this crazy attraction to her forever, at least it felt like forever.

"It's not that..." She said nervously.

"Then what?"

"I can't forget about it." She admitted, honesty shining in the depths of her big blue eyes. He stared into the vulnerable orbs and reached for her. His lips were gentle, afraid to scare her. She was the one who sought entrance to his mouth with her tongue and tangled her hands in his hair. He held her tightly, his palm warm on her back, underneath her short sleep shirt.

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And Then She Fell

They leaned back on the sheets, his mouth leavings hers to kiss her neck. His tongue found the sensitive spot behind her ear, making her shiver lightly. His fingers made slow circles against her belly, as he pushed her shirt up an increment at a time. Her hands pressed against his hard bare chest, as his mouth traveled to her t-shirt covered shoulder, then lower making a trail down between her breasts, until he encountered the bared skin of her belly. The feel of his mouth and tongue on her skin, made her shiver again. He lifted her shirt and she let him pull it over her head. She had not put on another bra after taking off her wet clothes earlier. He just admired her slender form for a minute, his gaze scanning over every inch of exposed flesh.

He reached out and his fingers started at the valley of her breast, tracing its outline, memorizing the perfect curve. He cupped the soft mound as his mouth was drawn to the pink tip, his tongue circling, making her breath catch. His teeth grazed the sensitive flesh, making her gasp and then he started to suck on her nipple, causing new sensations to pulse from that point to places lower in her body. He took his time teasing one breast before starting on the other, enjoying her little whimpers. He didn't remember ever taking this much time to just taste a girl, but she was so sweet he didn't want to hurry.

"Tommy." She murmured and his name had never sounded so good on anyone else's lips. Her hand reached down and caressed his cheek, making him look up to catch her blue-gray eyes. His eyes were lost in their depths as he found his mouth reaching for hers, taking hers in a bruising kiss. All of a sudden, his patience deserted him, as her tongue met his. He positioned himself between her legs, pressing against her through the fabric of their pants. Her breasts pressed against his naked chest as he rubbed his lower body against hers. The friction was almost too much and not nearly enough. He hooked his thumbs in the waistbands of her shorts and panties pulling them down her legs. He quickly got rid of his own pajama bottoms and looked down at her flushed body. His fingers moved between her legs, finding her ready for him. His arm reached over her to the nightstand drawer, pulling a condom out. He sheathed himself quickly and positioned himself between her legs, leaning down to kiss her again. Her arms around his neck as her mouth moved against his. She pulled back as she felt his arousal at her entrance. She looked into his eyes darkened with passion.

"Tommy I've never..." She whispered a little embarrassed. He looked down into her eyes and kissed her, until she forgot everything, but the sensations inundating her.

"Just hold on." He whispered as his erection brushed against her. And she did, tightening her arms around his neck, their mouths meeting again. He sank slowly into her warmth, letting her get used to the feel of him inside of her. He began to push deeper into her watching her eyes for any sign of discomfort, but all he saw was surprise and that look of trust she always gave him. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he began to stroke against her inner muscles. Her eyes had darkened to a stormy blue and small whimpers escaped her lips as he changed the angle a little, rubbing himself against her more fully.

He had been with many girls, but somehow this was different. She was different

and all he cared about was making this good for her. At the same time, he couldn't seem to hang on to any control. Her mouth found the pulse at the base of his neck, biting down as he twisted his hips in a way that hit her just right. She could feel the pleasure spreading through her, centering on their joined bodies as his thrusts grew more urgent. Her muscles clamped down on him, as she started to go over. He felt himself break apart as he pushed himself into her tight wet heat. He collapsed against her, wanting to be as close as possible. He had never had the urge before, to hold on so tight that the other person became a part of him. She held him just as close, her legs tangled with his now, her arms still wrapped around his neck.

He lifted his head finally and looked down at her. He gave her a soft kiss on the lips.

"Are you okay?" He whispered. She gave him a small-satisfied smile that made him want her all over again.

"I think so." She ached a little, but it was a pleasant kind of ache, bordering on pleasure. He rolled off of her and onto his back, pulling her into his arms. They didn't speak, both of them trying to absorb what had just happened.

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A Place We've Never Been

Later on Jude sat up in his bed and leaned over, reaching for her scattered clothes.

"Hey where are you going?" His palm caressed her hip.

"Back to my room?" She made it a question. This, him, it was all new to her and old news for him. She didn't know what to do. He sat up and cradled the back of her head with his hand, pulling her into his lips. She found herself wrapping her arms around his waist without conscious thought. He pulled back from the kiss and touched her cheek with the back of his other hand.

"Remember when you asked if I had ever been in love?" She nodded.

"You said if you had, you didn't know it."

"I was wrong. I never was or I _would_ have known it." Her eyes searched his for answers.

"How...?" He placed his fingers against her swollen lips.

"Because now I know what it feels like." Her eyes widened. Was he saying he loved her? He gave her a small grin. "Yeah I do." He said answering her unasked question and pulled her in for another kiss.

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Not So Sneaky

It was 6:30 when Jude tried to leave Tommy's room unnoticed. Her hair was a mess and she was strangely tired, but not sleepy. They had cuddled, kissed and dozed, but not gotten any real sleep. As she turned to shut his door, Bruno came out of his room two doors down. She froze as she looked at him. He had a towel around his neck and gym shorts and a tank top on. His eyes widened as he saw whom it was leaving Tommy's room.

"Morning." She said with a weak smile.

"Hey..." They gave each other one more glance, before he walked towards the gym and she back to her own room.


	9. Chapter 9

_SMUT warning! Hope you like the next chapter and review!_

**Chapter 9**

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Rules of the Road

Jude reached for the phone as soon as she got back to her room. She frowned as she asked for his room.

"Hello."

"Tommy."

"You missing me already Harrison?"

"Cute. No... Bruno saw me leaving your room!"

"So?" Tommy should have been glad he wasn't face to face with her at that moment. She might have been tempted to strangle him.

"What if he says something?"

"Girl relax. Bruno won't say anything."

"How do you know?"

"1.Because Bruno doesn't blab. 2. We're on tour and whatever happens on tour stays on tour, unless it involves destruction of property at least. Sean's got a girlfriend at home and _she_ doesn't know what he does every night. 3. We all have too much dirt on each other to make it a big deal." Jude relaxed a little bit, wondering if she was worrying too much.

"But what about Darius?"

"Come on Jude. Do you really think D. doesn't know what happens on tour? All he cares about is the concerts going smoothly and us making him money."

"So I'm an idiot for worrying?"

"No girl. I'm just saying nobody here is going to say anything. Okay?"

"Okay..." She wasn't ready to mention Portia, if he didn't bring it up.

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A Slight Touch

Jude and Spied were walking down the hallway when they saw Boyz Attack coming from the other direction. Chaz tried to catch Jude's eye, but she only saw Tommy. Jude and Tommy exchanged a quick look, as they walked by one another. Their fingertips curled and held in a secret caress, both of them with small smiles on their faces after they passed each other. They thought they were being discreet, but Spied had seen the glance Tommy had given Jude and the secretive smile she now had on her lips.

"Dude we need to talk."

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Falling Faster

Spied pulled her into her dressing room with a serious look on his face. Even though they hadn't worked out as a couple she was still his best friend and he was worried.

"What's up Spied?"

"Jude me and you dated for a while and we had a good time... But I always knew I wouldn't be the one to make your heart stop. I knew when you found 'the one' you would give him all of you without question. You're that girl." Jude frowned at her friend. "I knew when you fell it would be with everything you are." Spied rarely showed it, but he could be really deep at times.

"What's your point Vin?" She didn't think she was ready to hear what he had to say.

"Argh first name usage. You only do that when you're P.O.'d or trying to avoid the topic." She gave him a impatient look. "This thing with Tommy...Jude it's not going to end well. He's married. Get out before you really fall for him." He studied her face, reading the expressions she couldn't hide. "It's already too late isn't it?"

"I slept with him Vin." They were both silent as those words seemed to echo off the white walls. Although Jude was one of the guys she had always had the most romantic heart. She didn't believe in casual sex and if he wasn't mistaken Tommy would have been her first.

"Shit." He finally said breaking the tense silence, and they both laughed. "Lisa what am I going to do with you?" He pulled her in for a hug.

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After Hours

Jude sat on the couch strumming her guitar while girls flirted with Tommy, Chaz and Sean. SME, Bruno and J.P. Had already headed off somewhere with a few fans, leaving Jude at the stadium waiting on Tommy. Tommy would look her way occasionally and give her her look. He flirted back with the pretty girls, but she could see he wasn't as into it as he appeared. She was getting bored and wondered if she should just head back to the hotel when a guy stopped in front of her. He had light brown hair, green eyes and a killer smile which he was directing at her. He looked to be in his early 20's and she was surprised to see a guy with a backstage pass.

"Jude right? I'm a big fan." She gave him a skeptical look. It's not like she had had that much exposure. "Well since this concert I have been. You killed." He admitted. "Can I sit? I'm Justin by the way." She moved her legs off the seat and scooted over. He sat down beside her flashing another smile her way.

"So are you a big Boyz fan?" He laughed.

"God no. I had to bring my younger sister and a couple of her friends." He nodded towards the group clustered around Chaz. "I'm more into Sonic Youth and Nirvana." She smiled.

"Me too." They started to talk about various groups and she found she was enjoying herself.

Tommy saw the kid sit down next to Jude and he frowned, totally losing track of what the fans around him were saying. Jude laughed at something the kid said and Tommy's fingers clenched. He watched as they continued to talk animatedly. When the boy touched her arm, it was too much. He left the gaggle of girls abruptly and walked over to Jude. They both looked up at him in surprise.

"Jude I need to talk to you." He took her hand and pulled her up. Jude gave Justin an apologetic look as Tommy dragged her towards his dressing room.

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The Right Buttons

He shut the door behind them and turned to her. She frowned at the expression on his face wondering why he would be angry at her. _She_ had been the one waiting around for him while he flirted with other women.

"What's wrong Tommy?"

"Why were you hanging out with that guy?" He asked through clenched teeth. She had never heard him use that tone of voice with her and frankly she didn't like it.

"What? I'm not allowed to talk to anyone?"

"You were flirting with him!" He accused. Her eyes widened at his hypocrisy.

"Me?! What about you?!" She couldn't even say anything else, she was getting so angry. He saw the fire in her eyes and brought his mouth down on hers hard. She was surprised for the barest second before she responded to his bruising kiss. Her arms wrapped around his neck as he backed her towards the vanity. He lifted her up onto the table and positioned himself between her legs. Her hands went underneath his shirt, nails digging into his skin as he started to kiss her neck. She threw her head back allowing him better access and he reached for the hem of her shirt. She lifted her arms and he pulled it off in once motion, throwing it across the room.

His lips found the swell of her breasts and he pushed the lace of her bra aside so he could suck on her exposed nipple. She gasped when his teeth nipped at her lightly. Her moans were driving him mad and he soon ripped his own shirt off and had her jeans unbuttoned. She kicked off her boots and wiggled out of her jeans and panties while he took care of his own. He took a condom from his bag and sheathed himself quickly. Her arms reached for him as he put his hand underneath her thighs to pull her to the edge of the table, angling her hips up.

He pushed into her quickly and she gasped. His lips were on hers again as he pounded into her. Their tongues met in an almost angry dance as he worked himself in and out of her, sliding against her just right. Her nails made crescent moons on his back as she felt herself begin to go. Her convulsing muscles triggered his pleasure too as he thrust into her a few more times before collapsing against her. His forehead rested against her shoulder as he tried to catch his breath. He looked into her eyes in horror.

"Jude I'm sorry...Are you alright?" She nodded weakly as he moved off her and took care of the condom. He put his arm under her knees and one against her back, carrying her over to the couch. He sat down and pulled her into his lap.

"Are you sure you're okay? I didn't hurt you did I?" She shook her head, still a little shaky from all the adrenaline pumping through her veins.

"Geez Quincy what brought that on?" He kissed her lightly and rested his forehead against hers.

"I think I was...jealous?" He finally said in surprise. She laughed.

"You've never been jealous before?"

"Never..."

"Remind me to get you jealous more often." She pulled him in for a kiss and he knew they were alright.

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Permanent Detours

They had been on the road for 4 hours before the buses made a rest stop to fill up. Jude and SME got off the bus and headed over to the convenience store to buy some snacks. She wanted to see Tommy so badly, but only Spied and Bruno knew about them and they had hoped to keep it that way. She saw him walk in and he moved towards her, brushing past her as he reached for some red licorice. "I miss you." He whispered into her ear. She turned her head and her lips almost grazed his, but she pulled back.

"Me too." She pouted.

"Jude." Wally called to her. "The buses are getting ready to leave." She walked away reluctantly, looking back at him one more time.

Jude sat staring out the driver's side window as they got ready to pull away. She heard Dave, their bus driver, open the bus doors and looked up in surprise. Dave poked his head around the corner and called to her, nodding at the entrance. She got up and walked over to the bus steps, seeing him standing there. SME could not tell who it was, the partition blocking their sight. She walked down a step and threw herself into Tommy's arms. They kissed, until Dave interrupted.

"Um guys we need to get going." Tommy let her go reluctantly, but she held onto his hand.

"Ride with us." She pleaded. He smiled and she smiled back.

"Could you radio Ben and tell him I'll be over here?" Tommy turned to ask Dave. The other man nodded. She led him up the aisle and looked at the members of her band daring them to say anything. Spied just rolled his eyes. Wally and Kyle looked wide eyed and confused at their joined hands, having not been told anything.

"I wonder what your band is going to think." She said as they got settled close to one another. He shrugged.

"I could be hanging out with any of you."

"Yeah you could have a crush on Wally." She grinned. "Of course Spied's the one who likes women with a little extra packaging." She said loudly making sure he would hear.

"Hey! You promised not to bring that up again!" Spied called over his shoulder.

"I don't know. Do you think I'm pretty enough for Spied?" She eyed him pretending to consider the question.

"Well I heard the woman at the club was really hot...But I'll take you if Spied doesn't want you." She wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her lips to his. They didn't notice the gagging noises coming from the boys.

o;


	10. Chapter 10

_Warning more smut! Actually this will be my last warning, cuz if you don't already know there is smut in this story then you haven't been paying attention ;) It is one of my fav smut scenes in this story and trust me when I say there are more. ENJOY! And REVIEWS are appreciated if you like this story._

**Chapter 10**

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Big Brothers

Jude frowned over at the 3 boys who were playing cards. Spied would look up occasionally and glare at Tommy. Wally and Kyle seemed to be following his lead, ignoring Tommy or barely speaking to him at all. She got it she really did. They were worried about her and she didn't blame them, but she was starting to get pissed at their attitude. Jude wanted Tommy here and he had just said that maybe he should get back on his own bus, sensing the boys hostility. She stood up suddenly, surprising Tommy who had been reading a newspaper. She stalked over to Spied, interrupting their card game. Tommy watched as Jude yanked Spied up and forced him to follow her to her bedroom. He could hear them talking, but could not make out the words.

"Bart cool it okay? I want to be with Tommy right now." Spied frowned at her, but didn't say anything. "Please Vin. You're one of my best friends. But I'm in love with him." He had known that, but hadn't wanted to admit it. He didn't like seeing Jude upset over his behavior though.

"Alright Dude...I'll treat him like any Boyz Attack member from now on." Jude wasn't sure if she liked the sound of that.

Jude and Tommy had fallen asleep on the couch, his arm around her and her head on his shoulder. Tommy woke up when something he felt something tickling his face. His free hand went to brush away the annoyance and then his eyes flew open and he sat up straight causing Jude to fall sideways onto the seat beside him. She looked up at him and gave a small laugh, making him glare at her as he used his clean hand to wipe off the big dollop of shaving cream now stuck to his face. She had shaving cream on her hand too, but hadn't taken the bait. Somehow SME had wound up back at their table and were continuing to pretend they were playing their game.

"Aww come on boys couldn't you think of something more original?" Jude called to them.

"Let's see you do better!" Spied called back and she grinned.

Later that night when SME had crashed from their junk food and soda high, Jude and Tommy did do better.

"Tell me why you have food dye again?" Tommy whispered to her.

"A girl's got to be prepared." She winked at him and proceeded to do the same prank the boys had pulled with her own little twist. All three of them fell for it.

"Aww come on Dude even you said this prank was lame." Spied whined at her. Wally looked over at him and looked confused.

"Spied how come your face is blue?" Spied looked at Wally who had a big smudge of red on his and then down at his hand that had deep blue tinted shaving cream on it. They looked over at Kyle who's face was green. Jude and Tommy stood smirking at them, before heading to her bedroom and locking the door behind them.

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Thank Them Later

They arrived at the hotel the next day, but Jude and Tommy didn't get off the bus right away. They had gotten engrossed in writing a song and were still working on it when everyone else went to check in. When they finally stopped and walked out the open bus doors together, a bucket of water fell on them. They both glared at SME who were smart enough to stand across the parking lot laughing at them. Jude turned back to see Tommy's eyes had turned a darker shade of blue. He had a glint in his eyes as he stared at her chest. She had on a plain white t-shirt and a white lace bra underneath, both now soaked through. Even the boys could see the way the wet, now transparent material clung to her body, from their vantage point 20 feet away. They saw Tommy grab her in for an intense kiss and then pull her back up the bus steps, closing the door behind them.

"Okay that didn't work out quite the way I expected." Wally said.

"Uh...I think we just did Quincy a favor." Kyle said. Spied frowned. Maybe it would be better to focus on the other Boyz Attack members. Jude was _their_ bud after all.

__

Outside Intruding

Jude lifted her head from the pillow to answer the ringing phone. She was still a little groggy having just woken up 5 minutes ago.

"Hello." She croaked.

"Hey Sis. Are you _still_ sleeping?" It was 10:30 AM now. Ahh the life of a rock star.

"Hey Sades. No I'm up...kinda..." Jude said yawning while sitting up with her back to the headboard.

"So does Tommy Q look as good in person?"

"Oh yeah..." Jude watched Tommy as he walked out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist and one in his hand, drying his hair. She eyed his muscled chest appreciatively and unconsciously licked her lips. _There_, washer reason for staying in bed late. He caught the glimmer in her eyes and gave her a sexy smirk.

"Who's on the phone?" He asked. She clapped her hand over the receiver end and glared at him. 'Sadie' she mouthed. He grinned at her as she went back to her phone call.

"Jude is someone there with you?"

"Um...No...It was just the T.V." Jude had always lied badly. Tommy got onto the bed and crawled his way between Jude's legs.

"Okay...So have you been hanging out with him? Cuz I can't wait to meet him when I visit." Sadie was scheduled to fly down to meet the tour the following week. She was going to stay with them for 10 days before her second summer session of university classes. She had been an overachiever ever since Jude could remember. Sadie had always been a huge Boyz Attack fan. She had all of their posters on her bedroom wall, but Tommy had always been her favorite hands down.

"Um yeah some." Jude's voice was breathy as Tommy's mouth found her inner thigh.

"Jude are you alright? You sound kind of out of breath." His teeth nipped her soft flesh gently as he made his way closer to her center.

"I uh was in the shower when the phone rang, so I had to run out here to get it." Tommy chuckled and then his tongue went back to teasing her soft skin. She really was a horrible liar. Sadie heard the muffled male laughter through the phone and held it away from her in shock.

"Jude there's someone there with you isn't there?! Did you hook up with a fan or something? Is it Spied?!"

"No...Of course not!" Jude gasped as his mouth started to suck on her... "Look Sadie I gotta go. I have to meet the boys for breakfast." She said hurriedly trying not to whimper in pleasure at Tommy's wicked mouth.

"Jude!" Jude hung up, dropping the phone back onto its base and her hands tangled in Tommy's damp hair. Little did she know she had missed the cradle.

"Don't stop..." Jude groaned. Sadie froze in shock with the phone still pressed to her ear. NO WAY!

"Jude!" She shouted and Jude heard the voice still coming through the receiver. She froze for a second wondering if her sister had heard anything, and then she picked it up and made sure to hang up, leaving Sadie to a dial tone.

She was quickly distracted as Tommy continued to flick his tongue along her clit, making her muscles quiver. His hands were on her thighs holding her wide open for him, as he continued to torment her. Her head hit the headboard as she threw it back, when his fingers entered her and his mouth continued its assault on her. She went after just a few thrusts of his curving fingers, hitting her G-Spot just right. He gave her one last lick as he slid up her body, to kiss her. Her mouth opened immediately for him and she could taste herself on his lips.

If anyone had asked her before Tommy, if she would have believed she would be doing this she would have called them crazy, but now she was the crazy one. Her hand found him rock hard and she stroked up and down, making his breath catch. He loved the extra friction her guitar calloused fingers caused. He flipped her onto her stomach and pulled her legs wide. Tommy reached for a condom in the nightstand and quickly sheathed himself. His fingers massaged her swollen flesh, still sensitive from the last orgasm. He was soon hovering over her, sliding into her in one swift motion, making her gasp against the pillows.

The pillowcase was bunched in her fists as he stroked in and out of her. He grasped her hips and pulled her ass up, changing the angle so he could slide deeper. His hand found her breasts, kneading them, giving her one more focal point of sensation. He continued to push his way into her body, loving the feel of her tight sheath. He let go of her breasts and his hand found her clit instead, stroking it the way he had learned she liked. She let out small whimpers as his thrusts grew more urgent. She felt the building tidal wave as he continued his onslaught on her senses. Every nerve ending was crying out as he pushed in and out of her, his fingers finding their own rhythm. She felt herself start to convulse around him and heard his own cry of pleasure before he slid out and fell half on top of her. He kissed her sweaty neck and she smiled.

"Good morning." She murmured as she turned her head to grin at him.


	11. Chapter 11

_Here is the next chapter. I usually post every other day, but since I got some extra reviews I am happy ;) Also I will probably post chapter 12 later today too, dunno just kind of feel like it. ENJOY!_

**Chapter 11**

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The Truth

He let himself into his hotel room with a key card after rehearsal, to see her still there. She was sitting in the middle of the bed naked, with the sheets pooled around her waist and her guitar in her hands. The image hit him like a blow, because it was so Jude. This enigmatic, real, beautiful girl he had fallen for. She got to him in ways no one ever had or would again. She was singing a familiar song when she looked up and smiled at his presence, gazing into his eyes.

"Hey...I think I've finally finished this. Wanna listen?" He nodded and she began to play.

__

If I was drowning in the sea  
Would you dive right in and save me?  
If I was falling like a star  
Would you be right there to catch me?  
If I was dreaming of your kiss  
Would you look right through me?

On the street I'm waiting  
In my heart it's raining

Your eyes are holding up the sky  
Your eyes make me weak, I don't know why  
Your eyes make me scared to tell the truth  
I thought my heart was bullet-proof  
Now I'm dancing on the roof  
And everybody knows I'm into you

If my heart was sadder than a song  
Would you still listen?  
If my tears fell on you, one by one  
Would you see them glisten?

On the street I'm waiting  
In my heart it's raining

Your eyes are holding up the sky  
Your eyes make me weak I don't know why  
Your eyes make me scared to tell the truth  
I thought my heart was bullet-proof  
Now I'm just dancing on the roof

Every single thing you say makes me want to run away  
Sometimes love's a rainy day but life goes on

Your eyes are holding up the sky  
Your eyes make me weak, I don't know why  
Your eyes make me scared to tell the truth  
I thought my heart was bullet-proof  
But I'm dancing on the roof  
And everybody knows I'm into you

He sat down on the bed as she sang and when she was done he suddenly had his lips on hers, one hand tangled into her hair. He helped her place the guitar to one side as he pushed her back among the sheets. His clothed body pressed against her naked form. She had never known something that simple could be so erotic, as the friction of his denim clad legs rubbed against her naked flesh. He pulled back from their joint lips and looked deep into her eyes.

"I love you." He said as he memorized the delicate curves of her face. His hand went up and brushed the stray wisps of hair out of her face.

"I love you too." She whispered as she scanned his cerulean eyes, sensing his strange mood. It had never been important, until her, that someone believed his words or believed in him. And tomorrow he would have to pretend for her that they were merely friends and co-workers. He would have to pretend he had never tasted her lips or known the feel of her naked skin pressed against his. He wondered if he could dislike someone he had never met.

__

Conclusions

They stood in the stadium lobby waiting for her sister to arrive from the airport. His arm was around her shoulders as they laughed about the last movie they had seen together. She grinned up at him and Sadie saw them as she wheeled her luggage into the building. She smiled to see her sister so happy with the boy she had apparently started dating again.

"You guys got back together!" Sadie gushed as she reached them. "I knew there was a guy in your room when I called last week!" Spied dropped his arm and gave Jude a questioning look. She had told SME that Sadie didn't know about Tommy and she wanted to keep it that way. She couldn't exactly let Sadie blab to Stuart Harrison that his youngest daughter was sleeping with a married boy-bander after all.

"Wait. You guys are doing it?!" Sadie said in realization.

"Sadie...Shut up!" Jude looked around hoping no one had heard her outburst, her cheeks getting warm.

They spotted J.P. Walking by and Jude introduced him to her sister. Sadie was soon in deep discussion with him about his music and Jude and Spied were left to watch.

"Wait how did she know you were doing the dirty in your room?" Spied asked as he thought back to the conversation. Jude mumbled how she hadn't exactly hung up the phone like she had meant to. Spied laughed in amusement at his friend's discomfort.

"Dude I always thought you'd be a screamer." Jude hit his arm.

"You wish perv." He snickered.

"You know I do." He wrapped his arm around her waist and dragged her towards her sister and J.P.

Spied wondered who would win the bet. No one really talked about it much, but everyone knew about Tommy and Jude. The Boyz , except Chaz had not been phased by it. Jude wasn't the first opening act Tommy had gotten involved with in recent history. They all remembered Brianna with fond memories. Almost everyone had found the couple in one compromising situation or another. They spent all their free time in one another's rooms after all. SME and the Boyz minus Chaz had made a wager to see how long Tommy and Jude could go without Sadie finding out the truth. Chaz was strangely quiet about the whole thing.

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First Dance

They both wondered how this had happened. How exactly had they wound up at a club with Sadie, Spied, and Sean, J.P. And their dates for the evening. Tommy looked at Jude with frustration in his eyes. It had only been 2 days and he was already sick of pretending for Sadie. Sadie had clung to him like a burr, since they had first been introduced. She was a beautiful girl and Jude had been right when she had said Sadie would have been his type. Of course that was before this crazy rocker chick came knocking his world off it's axis. He had danced with Sadie twice already. The girl tried to grind up so close to him, his body couldn't help but respond and that had made him feel guilty. And the guilt had made him angry, so he had blown her off and headed for the nearest drink.

Jude sat down next to him at the bar and touched his hand lightly while checking to make sure Sadie was still occupied with Sean on the dance floor.

"Jude we need to tell her." Tommy said, impatience in his tone.

"Tommy you know why we can't...Please.." She begged, her blue eyes pleading with his. He sighed and reached to touch her cheek, but she flinched away. He glared at her and knocked back another shot. A slow song came on and Tommy grabbed Jude's hand starting to pull her onto the floor even though she tried to resist.

"Even friends can dance together Jude." She let him lead her into the crowd of bodies. Her arms went around his neck as he pulled her in and his hands went around her slender waist. 2 days and he already missed the feel of her. He was addicted to her, but couldn't seem to care. She looked up at him with her blue-gray eyes and his eyes softened. His hand dipped underneath the hem of her silk spaghetti strapped red top, that Sadie had forced her to wear, and she let out a small gasp at the feel of his palm on her naked back. The crowd swallowed them up and they noticed no one, but each other.

"This is the first time you've ever danced with me." She nodded as their bodies seemed to meld impossibly close.

"I can't dance." He raised an eyebrow.

"What are we doing right now?"

"Having sex with our clothes on?" She quipped. Her words made him instantly hard and she looked at him in shock. Her body responded to the dark eyes staring down at her and her mouth parted to take in a shaky breath.

She felt herself being pulled towards the back of the club. They walked into the V.I.P. Lounge and then past to the semi-private bathrooms. He pushed her into a stall and locked the door behind them. His mouth was on hers instantly, demanding entrance with his tongue. He lifted her up against the wall and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Sadie had done one thing right tonight at least. She had insisted Jude wear a short skirt.

His fingers pushed the one strap of her top down and his mouth went to her breast. He sucked and nibbled making her cry out. Her hand went to the back of his head to hold his mouth to her chest. He reached down underneath her skirt and touched her already damp heat. He slid her g-string to one side and pushed two fingers into her as her muscles clamped down at the intrusion. She leaned back a little and had her hands on his belt undoing it and then working on his jeans. He tore her panties off and managed to shift her weight with one hand and push his own jeans and boxers down. He positioned himself at her entrance and thrust up quickly. She wrapped her arms and legs around him again, her mouth finding his, as he pushed himself in and out of her. He pressed her against the cold tiled wall, thrusting harder as she gasped his name.

"I want to watch you as you come." He said as he twisted his hips in a way that created more friction against her sensitive flesh. He watched her eyes as he moved deep inside of her. When he saw them cloud over with starting pleasure, he stroked into her harder and faster. Her muscles quivered and convulsed around him as he took her mouth to muffle her scream. Her short nails dug into the back of his neck as he continued to pound himself into her naked flesh. Her eyes had opened again and she was watching him now.

"Come for me." She rasped as she purposefully tightened her inner muscles against his rigid flesh. It was enough to send him over as he pushed into her and found his own release. He lowered her legs to the floor and she stood unsteadily still leaning against the wall. His hands rested on either side of hers as he leaned over her. He rested his forehead to hers and they both closed their eyes. The sound of their heavy breathing filled the small room.

The moved apart and cleaned themselves up. He buttoned his jeans and zipped them as she leaned over to pick up her shredded panties. He winced as she gave him a look.

"Sorry..." She laughed and pushed the balled material into his jacket pocket. She tried to pull her little skirt lower, hoping she could make it the rest of the night without flashing anyone. They left the stall and she looked in the mirror to try and salvage her hair and makeup as best as she could. Their eyes caught and held in the glass. "I'll try to be good from now on. I promise." She gave him a disbelieving look and shook her head. The door swung open to reveal a man coming in who looked at Jude in surprise. She tried to give him a nonchalant look as she walked by him out the door leaving Tommy to fix himself up.

Jude walked over to Sadie who was having a drink at the bar with Spied. Her sister's cheeks were flushed and it appeared she had already had a few.

"Where have you been?" Her sister shouted to be heard over the music.

"There was a line in the women's room." Spied just rolled his eyes, noticing his friend's disheveled appearance immediately.

"Have you seen Tommy?"

"Uh...I think he might have gone off with some girl." Sadie frowned and got a determined look in her eyes that Jude did not like. It was the 'what Sadie wants, Sadie gets' look Jude was all too familiar with growing up.


	12. Chapter 12

_As I promised I am posting 2 chapters today. BTW Saderia the lack of condom only means I was too lazy to write it in. It means absolutely nothinging in this story. ;)_

**Chapter 12**

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Kwest is the Best?

"Hey Kwest." He turned to see Tommy walking over to him with a gorgeous blond wearing a very short, tight blue strapless dress clinging to his arm. He admired her assets for a moment, and then Kwest looked at the two of them in surprise. Jude and SME were on stage performing and Tommy was with someone else?! He eyed the curvaceous blond more closely. She was exactly Tommy's type, but Kwest had thought things had changed since Jude had come on the scene.

"Kwest this is Jude's sister Sadie." Kwest eyed Tommy more closely and relaxed. Tommy didn't have that indulgent smirk he got for his playmates, in fact he looked kind of disturbed and not in a good way.

"Sadie this is Kwest. He's a friend of mine." Sadie said her hellos, but Kwest could tell she was only interested in vamping it up for Tommy. She flirted with him shamelessly and touched him as much as possible.

"Um Tommy could you come pick out the mike you want to use later?" Kwest walked over to one corner and Tommy followed, leaving Sadie to watch Jude's performance.

"T What's going on? Doesn't Sadie know about you and Jude?" Tommy sighed.

"Jude didn't want her to know."

"Why not?" Kwest asked amazed. "Are you telling me this poor girl throwing herself at you is better?"

"Jude seems to think Sadie will tell their father his 18 year old daughter is sleeping with a married man." Tommy said sardonically. Kwest winced.

"Oh..."

"Yeah..." They both stood there for a moment, Tommy really not wanting to go back to face Sadie and Kwest because he was still taking in the situation. "Hey man do me a favor and hang with her while I sing with Jude?" Kwest nodded.

Kwest and Sadie watched the couple sing, from the wings. Jude's face was visible while Tommy was facing away from them. He was always amazed by the electricity they generated together on that stage. It was almost a tangible thing, their connection to each other.

"Hey Sadie?"

"Yeah Kwest." She turned her sky blue eyes towards him.

"I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but maybe you should lay off of Tommy." Her eyes widened in confusion.

"Why? He's a big boy..."

"Well it's just... Jude and Tommy are good friends. You could complicate things."

"Are you saying they're hooking up?"

"No...I'm just saying Jude really cares for him. I mean look at them out there."

She watched them more closely and could see the look in her sister's face as she sang with him. She frowned and thought she understood now, why Jude had warned her away from Tommy with the 'he's married' excuse. Jude had a crush on Tommy Q! The guy Sadie had always wanted and Jude had always made fun of. Jude wanted Tommy for herself! As if there was ever a chance of that happening. Starting when Jude had been in 6th grade the boys Jude had liked had always wanted Sadie. This would be no different.

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Sweet Sister

As soon as Sadie got Jude alone in their hotel room that night, she pounced. She had been waiting through the entire concert to give Jude a piece of her mind. How could Jude be so manipulative?

"You have a thing for Tommy don't you?" Sadie accused, hands on hips. "You only warned me about him, because you want him!" Jude tried to respond, but Sadie scoffed. "As if you have a chance with Tommy."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jude said quietly. Everything had always been a competition to Sadie growing up. The only thing Jude had had until Tommy was music. Sadie was beautiful, and uber-smart, she spoke 4 languages for God's sake. She also knew exactly how to act dress and how to act around guys. She was everything Jude was not and Jude had finally stopped trying to live up to her sister.

"Come on Jude. You're pretty, but Tommy dates fashion models. You aren't exactly in that league."

"Are you saying I'm not good enough for him?!" _Oh if you only knew sweet sister_, Jude thought.

"I think boys like Jamie and Vin are more your speed." Jude shook her head angrily. Sadie always did this. She always turned everything into a contest, whether it was for their parents affection or anything else Jude had ever wanted. Sadie only saw Lil Tommy Q, as a possession, another notch on her belt.

"Think what you want Sadie." Jude stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

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Unexpected

Tommy walked into his room after he had finally gotten away from the fans backstage. It was part of the job to flirt with the adoring girls after all.

"Hey..." He said in pleasant surprise as he saw her sitting on the bed with a remote control in her hands. She had her knees tucked up to her chest and looked annoyed. "Not that I'm not happy to see you, but I thought you had to stay with your sister..." She got up and walked into his arms. He held her for a moment before she started to speak.

"We got in a fight. She said I had a crush on you and that you'd never like someone like me. Apparently you're out of my league." She grumbled against his chest. Tommy grinned against her hair.

"She's right about one thing." Jude didn't catch the teasing quality in his tone. She glared up at him and tried to pull away, but he held her fast.

"You're not the type of girl I like." Her eyes were starting to darken with anger. "You're the girl I love." She poked him in the ribs.

"Stop teasing me. I'm not in the mood. I love Sadie, but she can be a real bitch." Tommy widened his eyes at her words.

"What are you in the mood for then?" He cajoled as he kissed her neck. He backed her towards the bed and kissed her body until she couldn't remember anything, but his tongue licking along her skin.

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Missing Persons

Sadie glanced at the alarm clock again and frowned. It was now 2 am and Jude had been gone for 3 hours. She might have been angry with Jude, but she was still her sister and she loved her. She started to worry, wondering where the hell Jude could have gone.

She knocked on the door impatiently and then knocked again when he didn't answer right away.

"What the hell?!" Spied growled as he swung it open. "Sadie?" He said in confusion.

"Is Jude with you? She never came back to the room and I was getting worried."

"Spiedy!" A high pitched girl's voice shouted from further inside the room. "Come back to bed!" Sadie flushed. That was definitely not Jude's voice. Spied turned and assured the girl he would be right there before he looked at Sadie again. Apparently Jude had been telling the truth when she had said there was nothing going on between she and Spied. He looked at Sadie impatiently.

"Did you try asking Quincy?"

"No. Why would I...?"

"Goodnight Sadie." Spied started to shut the door in her face and she had to step back in order not to get hit with it. She stared at the closed door in shock.

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Goodnight Sadie

Tommy opened his room door sleepily, clad in only a towel, slung low around his waist. Sadie's mouth turned dry as she looked over his broad shoulders, muscled chest and corded arms. She saw the fresh hickey on one pec and felt a stab of jealousy.

"Oh my God you have someone with you. I'm so sorry...I just..." She started to blush furiously. He was so hot! He interrupted her rambling.

"What do you want Sadie?" He said in his husky voice. The curtness in his tone confused her. Guys did not speak to her like that! They were usually sweet and cajoling.

"I...Spied said you might know where Jude is. I know it sounds crazy. I mean you're obviously busy..." She trailed off as he moved back a step and swung the door wider to reveal the girl in his bed. She was facing away from the door, long blond hair cascaded off one shoulder. The sheets were draped around her waist, exposing the lines of her slender curves and bare back.

"Can this wait 'til morning?" Her eyes shot back to his sapphire blue ones. "She just got to sleep." Sadie was stunned into silence for a brief moment.

"Uh...I just wanted to make sure she was okay..." He nodded and started to close the door.

"Goodnight Sadie."


	13. Chapter 13

_The song in this chapter is Love Bites by Def Leppard_

**Chapter 13**

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Morning Calls

Jude groaned as she woke up to the sound of the alarm clock beeping. She felt Tommy move towards his edge of the bed and the annoying sound abruptly shut off. He rolled back towards her and she opened her eyes to find his staring back at her.

"Hi..." She gave him a small sleepy smile.

"Hi..." He returned it with a sexy smile of his own. She glanced past him to check the time and found it was only 6:15 am.

"Quincy why did you set the alarm so early?"

"We have to take a shower."

"It only takes me like 10 minutes..." She adjusted her head on the pillow and closed her eyes again.

"Not if I wash your back." She opened her eyes to see him grinning at her.

"Is that what the kids are calling it these days?" He let out a small laugh.

"You're a piece of work Harrison." He leaned over and gave her a soft kiss. Tommy stood up and pulled Jude to a standing position with him. He proceeded to pick her up and sling her over his shoulder.

"Hey! I can walk you know?"

"Yeah, but I like this vantage point better for your sexy ass." He gave her a playful smack on said ass and started for the bathroom.

"Tommy!" She laughed and wriggled as they entered the other room.

He put her down and reached for the shower knob as his lips found hers. She wrapped her arms around him as they tripped stepping into the bathtub. He pushed her away from him and turned her around so her back was to him. She felt thick liquid on her hair as his fingers began to massage her scalp. She closed her eyes as the water streamed down and his fingers worked through her hair. He moved her forward to rinse her hair, pressing his lips to her neck in an open mouthed kiss, sucking on her slick skin.

Then she felt the rough fabric of the soapy washcloth rubbing circles against her belly and then move up to each breast making the nipples hard. His mouth continued to suck and nip at her throat, making her moan as he moved the washcloth against her skin. His hand began to travel lower until he reached her most sensitive area. He rubbed the cloth against her folds, making her bite her lip to keep from screaming. When she couldn't take the slow torment anymore she quickly turned and pushed him against the wall, her lips capturing his, her tongue asking for entrance against his mouth. When he wouldn't open for her, she started to work her way down his throat, nipping and licking like he had done to her. She slowly worked her way lower and lower with her lips, until her hot breath brushed his arousal. His hands fisted in her hair as she licked the tip of him, circling and teasing.

She finally took him in her mouth making him groan. She started to slide her head back and forth on his hardness. His hands tightened in her hair as she started to suck as she bobbed her head. He pulled her up, before she could make him come. This time he pushed her against the wall taking her mouth in a bruising kiss. He lifted her up and entered her in one swift motion. Tommy loved the gasp she always made at his entrance into her body. He thrust into her hard and deep, almost pulling all the way out before pushing in again. His motions quickened as her tight heat became too intoxicating.

"Jude come with me." He rasped, as he felt the pleasure begin to spiral out of control. She let out a small scream as her muscles started to convulse around him. He rammed into her hard, almost bruising her back as he pushed her against the tile. His own release exploded through him in a wave of sensation. Tommy let her go and she slid boneless to the bathtub floor, where he dropped down beside her. He reached up to switch from the knob from shower to bathtub spout and let the tub fill. He rested his head against Jude's shoulder, panting, still out of breath. When he looked up into her eyes, he saw the sparkle that he loved.

"That's one way to wake a girl up." She grinned and bit his lower lip.

"Jude I need to tell you something."

"Hmm..." She said distracted by his wet skin as her fingers traced the defined muscles of his chest.

"Sadie came by last night looking for you." Her eyes shot up to his and he was afraid she would explode, but her words surprised him.

"Oh well...At least this way I get to have you to myself." She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.

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Who's the Dumb Blond Masquerading As My Sister?

Jude let herself into her room and saw Sadie sitting on the couch watching a morning talk show. Sadie looked up at her and frowned.

"Come here I need to talk to you." Sadie commanded. Jude rolled her eyes and walked over sitting on the matching chair. "What's going on with you Jude?" Jude really wasn't sure what she was supposed to say to that ambiguous question. Sadie sighed and continued. "You didn't have to throw yourself at Tommy just to prove I was wrong Jude." Jude looked at her sister in stupefied amazement.

"Wait...You think... I went to Tommy's room last night to jump him because of what you said?!"

"Well didn't you?"

"You still don't get it...You are like the smartest person I know. How can you be so blind?" Jude just wanted to scream in frustration.

"Come on Jude you expect me to believe Tommy Q really wants you for more than a one night stand? You were still a virgin when you left for this tour. Don't you think he wants someone with a little more experience?"

"You're just addicted to winning Sadie. Tommy is not one of your trophies." Tommy was right Jude realized, Sadie had to know what was going on between them. Jude was silent as she stood up and began to pack up the few things she had left there.

"The bus leaves in 45 minutes. Remember to turn in your room key." Jude said without looking at Sadie, as she picked up her stuff.

"Wait where are you going?"

"Away from you." Jude said angrily and opened the door to walk out.

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The Blond Gets It

It was 8:15 now and the buses were all supposed to have left 15 minutes ago. Sadie wondered who was running late on the Boyz Attack bus, as everyone was present on theirs. SME were all engrossed with the video game they were playing and Jude was sitting at one of the tables, reading a magazine. She had not said a single thing to Sadie since Sadie had gotten on board. The bus door opened and Sadie watched in shock as the latecomer walked onto the bus. She looked over at SME to see if they were as surprised as she was, but they barely gave him a glance as they continued to play their game. He had a duffel bag swung over his shoulder, a cardboard tray holding 2 cups of what she assumed was coffee and a box of strawberry frosted Pop Tarts rested between the cups. He made his way over to Jude and put the tray down, pulling a cup out and handing it to her as she looked up. He kissed her forehead and she smiled at him.

"Hey Quincy!" Spied shouted from his spot in front of the T.V. Tommy turned to look at him. "You could have remembered us too, since we let you have your way with our lead singer." Jude picked up one of Kyle's many random drumsticks and flipped it right at Spied's head. He ducked and it bounced off Wally's shoulder.

"Hey!" Wally said shrugging it off, still pushing manically at his controller. Tommy smirked and headed to the back of the bus with his bag and into Jude's room. He came back out minus the bag and went over to her as Sadie could only watch in stunned fascination. He lifted Jude's bare legs off the seat and sat down, depositing them on his lap. They were so comfortable with each other. Sadie watched as Tommy took a packet of Pop Tarts out of the box and opened it, handing one to Jude who absentmindedly took it and bit in while he started on the other.

Spied came over to Sadie and sat down, noticing her gaze still locked on the couple.

"How...how long Vin?" She turned and looked at him. He shrugged.

"A while..." Jude had let Sadie throw herself at Tommy knowing he wouldn't be interested! Sadie felt humiliation creeping over her, burning her cheeks. Spied could see she was pissed and he didn't blame her. He had told Jude she should have just told Sadie the truth from the beginning.

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Tommy's High?

When an 80's rock ballad came on the radio Tommy started to sing to a little too loudly to Jude. SME heads collectively snapped up from their game and they looked over at him like he had gone nuts. Sadie could only stare.

__

I don't wanna touch you too much baby

'cuz making love to you might drive me crazy

I know you think that love is the way you make it

So I don't wanna be there when you decide to break it

No!

Jude clamped her hand over his mouth to shut him up and he bit her, so she let go.

"Are you on drugs or something? You're starting to freak me out." He had been acting strangely all morning, not leaving Jude's side except to bring her things. He caressed her skin constantly and would whisper sweet nothings into her ear. Tommy and Jude liked being together, but they didn't normally feel the need to be with each other every second. And now he was singing a cheesy song to her? He looked at her innocently.

"What's wrong with serenading the woman I love?" She looked at him skeptically, knowing he had to be up to something.

"What's the real reason? You have been _way_ too nice." He stared into her big eyes and leaned to whisper into her ear.

"I just want your sister to know you're not some random hook up to me. You matter to me." Jude's eyes softened.

"That is so sweet... and kind of demented." He frowned at her and she giggled. "You don't have to keep trying. I know you want me Quincy."

"I guess that means I don't have to give you what I bought for you." Her eyes lit up.

"You bought me something?"

"You don't need me to show my devotion to you remember?" He teased.

"Give." She held out her hand.

"Close your eyes." She did so with a pout as he took a flat jewelry case out of his leather jacket. He pulled a pendant out of it and started to fasten it around her neck when her eyes flew open. She touched the chain and looked down to see a white gold crescent moon with a star dangling from the tip connected by a small diamond. She looked at him wide eyed.

"How did you...?"

"I saw it in the hotel jewelry store last night and asked them to open for me this morning." She shook her head. Typical Quincy using his fame to get what he wanted. "So do you like it?" Her answer was to take his face in her hands and kiss him, until the bus felt like it was spinning.

"Hey no PDA on the sacred bus!" Spied screamed when they wouldn't stop. She finally let him breathe with a big grin on her face.

They stopped at a rest stop for snacks when Sadie finally got Jude alone. She grabbed her arm and dragged her out of ear shot of the others.

"Why did you lie to me?!" Sadie practically screamed at her. "You must have thought it was so funny to see me all over Tommy when you knew he was only into you!" Jude cringed at Sadie's outburst, realizing she had hurt her.

"No Sadie it isn't like that...We didn't mean to..."

"Did you laugh together at Sadie's pathetic little attempts to seduce him?" Jude could only stare at her sister open mouthed. "You know what save it. Don't talk to me. I'll be gone in a few days anyway."

They both looked up when they heard Sadie's name being shouted by a male voice.

"Hey Sexy Sadie wanna ride with us?" The man called from the Boyz Attack bus, having witnessed the screaming match.

"Love to!" Sadie shouted back as she stomped away from Jude. Tommy walked up to Jude then and saw Sadie get on the bus.

"What happened?" He asked a still stunned looking Jude.

"I messed up..." He took her in his arms and she buried her face against his chest.


	14. Chapter 14

_Here's the next chapter. Thanks to everyone who has been reviewing. I like suggestions for my stories, but this one is actually almost completely written out and posted on DLS except 2 or 3 chapters so I will not be changing it. I **can** tell you that Portia will make an appearance and that there will be some major drama eventually. ENJOY!_

**Chapter 14**

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Revelations

When they arrived at the stadium Jude watched as Sadie got off the Boyz Attack bus with Chaz's arm wrapped around her waist. She frowned knowing this could not be good, as Chaz leaned down to whisper in her sister's ear and Sadie giggled in response. She also knew she had to give Sadie time to cool down, before Sadie would listen to anything Jude had to say, especially warnings about Chaz.

Jude finally got Sadie alone in their hotel room the following night. Jude had been staying in Tommy's room as usual and had left Sadie alone hoping a little time would lessen her anger. Apparently it hadn't because when Jude entered the room Sadie turned to glare at her.

"Shouldn't you be with Tommy?" Sadie sneered. Jude took a deep breath and sat down on the other double bed.

"Look Sadie...I'm sorry..."

"Yeah...Sure you are..." Sadie said disbelief clear in her voice.

"I am! I know you're mad at me, but please listen to me." Sadie just rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. "Watch out for Chaz. He's been through so many girls on this tour already." Sadie shook her head with a look of disgust on her face.

"What is it with you? Did you sleep with every Boyz Attack member or something?"

"What?! No!"

"Chaz was so sweet when we were hanging out. He listened to me when I bitched about you and Tommy. But then he started asking me questions about you. He thought he was being subtle, but I could tell he only wanted to know more about you. Why is he so obsessed with you?"

"I...I don't know...I mean he asked me out before, but I told him I wasn't interested." Sadie was not used to being second place in front of guys. "Sadie the only reason I didn't tell you about Tommy was because I was afraid you'd tell dad." Sadie was angry and hurt all over again hearing that Jude didn't trust her.

"God Jude do you really think that's a good enough reason to lie to me?!"

"No...But..."

"Why would you get together with him anyway? You said you hated boy banders." Sadie asked curiosity getting the best of her, even though she was still mad at her sister.

"You think I wanted to fall for him?! I came on this tour to get my music out there."

"Then what happened?" Jude shook her head. "You still can't tell me the truth?" Sadie scoffed. "He's married! You think he's going to leave his wife for you? You're just like Yvette!" Sadie said callously wanting to hurt her. Jude's face crumbled then as Sadie looked on in shock. Jude was not a crier. When their first dog Sam had died, 6 year old Jude had stayed dry eyed while Sadie had cried her heart out. Jude buried her face in her hands and Sadie could hear the sobs coming from her. Sadie moved over to sit besides Jude and put her hand tentatively on her back, but Jude didn't even notice.

"Jude I didn't mean it...Don't cry..." Sadie pulled her sister into her arms and Jude sobbed into her shoulder.

"I tried so hard not to fall for him Sadie. I swear. We just started hanging out together, as friends nothing else. When we talked...He just got me, like no one else ever did." Sadie stroked her hair softly like their mother used to do.

"Did he seduce you?" Jude shook her head against her sister's shoulder.

"We were hanging out one night and we got caught in the rain and we just kissed. It was like everything we had ever done together was leading to that kiss. It was so amazing and so scary." Jude looked up at Sadie. "Have you ever had a kiss like that? Where it's like you just know he's the only one it'll ever be like that with?"

"No Jude..." Sadie said softly, starting to realize how much Jude cared about Tommy and starting to worry.

"I don't know what to do Sadie."

"Jude you're going to get hurt if you stay with him..."

"I know, but I love him so much. How do I let that go?" Sadie was scared for her sister now. Tommy would break her heart. It was inevitable.

"I don't know."

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We Want Details

When Jude had finally calmed down, Sadie gave her a small smile.

"I think we should have a girls night out." Sadie suggested, though she could see Jude wasn't thrilled at the suggestion. "Come on..." Sadie wheedled. "I have to leave in a few days." Jude nodded reluctantly.

Jude called Tommy's room and left a message explaining where she'd be and that she's probably stay with Sadie the rest of the night. Sadie rolled her eyes.

"He doesn't own you you know?" Jude shrugged.

"Does it make me pitiful if I wish he did?" Sadie shook her head.

"You are hopeless."_ I know._

As they walked down the hotel hallway all dressed up or skanked up as Jude liked to think of it, Sadie asked a question that made Jude blush bright red.

"So how is he in bed?"

"Sadie!"

"Come on Jude. The world wants to know!"

"Let's just say...If it was any better...I'd probably just drop dead."

"Hey I want details!" They joked and argued the rest of the way to the hottest club in town. Where they drank into the wee hours, flirted with random guys and came back stumbling to their room.

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Big Sister

She had been avoiding him, he knew it and he alternated between anger and confusion. She had stayed with Sadie the night before and they had been on the bus the next day. Jude and Sadie had apparently worked out their differences and he was glad for her, but she was spending all her time with her sister and barely speaking to him. So when he saw Sadie sitting alone in the lounge, where they were performing that night, he immediately walked up to her.

"Hey Sadie." She looked up from her Economics textbook and gave him a funny look. He sat down next to her, forcing her to pay attention to him.

"What do you want Tommy?" Her voice was not overly friendly, surprising him a little. Jude and Sadie were getting along again, so why was Sadie P.O.'d at him?

"What's going on with Jude?" Sadie didn't answer. He could tell she knew something. "Did you say something to her?"

"Nothing she didn't already know."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sadie sighed.

"Do you care about my sister?" She asked seriously, looking into his eyes for any sign of a lie.

"More than anyone I've ever known." He said honestly knowing she was just looking out for Jude.

"She's not like your fans you know? She graduated from high school a virgin. I don't know what you think you're doing with her."

"Sadie..." He interrupted.

"Tommy if you care about her maybe you should let her go. You're going to hurt her." He could never hurt her, he thought. But deep down in his rarely acknowledged conscience he knew he might, because that was his M.O.

"I can't Sadie..." Sadie's blue eyes flashed fire now and he stopped her before she could yell at him. "I love her." She opened her mouth and closed it again, not knowing what to say. Tommy Q was in love with her sister and actually admitting it. And Jude was in love with him. They say love conquers all, but Sadie couldn't see their affair ending well.

"Well you better figure something out then, because you aren't single and you can't string Jude along forever."

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Bittersweet

Tommy got off the hotel elevator and saw her blond hair and familiar figure right away. She was walking out the door, into the heavy rain that was pelting the sidewalks. Sadie had left for the airport that morning and Jude had still not looked for him. The times she had seen him, she had been with her sister and the sadness in her eyes when she had caught his gaze had haunted him. He didn't want to explore the very real possibility that maybe she was trying to let him go. He quickly rushed to the entrance and out into the deluge, seeking out her form among the few solitary souls willing to brave the downpour. He finally saw her start to turn a corner and he ran.

Jude didn't know why she was stupid enough to be out here, in this miserable wet city. It was just everywhere she went, she thought of him, missing him. She was trying so hard to remember who she was before he came into her life. She needed to find herself again and not be this girl addicted to a man she had no right to. Someone grabbed her from behind and spun her around, making terror leap to her chest. His lips crushed down on hers and all of her thoughts fell away. When they parted to breathe, he pulled her to an overhang and brushed her wet bangs from her face, mirroring the gesture that had started their relationship. Her cheek leaned into the palm he held to it and she closed her eyes. His thumb traced her lips and then his mouth was on hers again. She wrapped her arms around his waist underneath his leather jacket, soaking what had still been dry, not that he cared. Tommy was too busy reminding her with his mouth and tongue what he meant to her. When he pulled away she stared up at his eyes that had turned a dark shade of blue.

"Don't let go Jude." She shook her head.

"I won't." She replied and hugged him.

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Bleed For Me

The rain was only a drizzle now as they walked along the city sidewalks. Not many people were out and those that were hurried along to their destinations. They didn't look twice at the soaked couple holding hands as they strolled down the street.

"What would you do for me?" Jude asked jokingly as swung around to face him.

"Anything."

"Would you eat a spider?" He raised an eyebrow at her.

"If I have to."

"Would you bleed for me?" He looked behind her at the shop window and grinned.

"Yeah I would." He bent down and kissed her lips softly, before pulling her towards the front door.

They emerged 3 hours later, Jude not quite sure how this had all happened. His lips had been so convincing as the needle brushed her bare hip and by that time it was too late to stop. It had hurt some, but she barely noticed as he held her hand and stared into her eyes. She wanted to see what the ink looked like against his skin, but the bandage covered it and she knew she would have to wait. She had told Sadie she wanted to belong to him and now in a small way she did. They both had the same tattoo branded into their skin now. His was on his right bicep and hers was on the backside of her left hip. It was simply a stylized J & T intertwined with curly q's surrounding it, making the individual letters hard to make out unless you knew what to look for. It looked like random swirls, making a paisley design. But they knew and that was all that mattered.


	15. Chapter 15

_Thanx for your indepth reviews Starsinger22 and to answer your question I currently have 41 chapters written and it should end at 43. And welcome Larydreamer and thanks for giving it a chance! Ths song is Hold On by the Goo Goo Dolls._

**Chapter 15**

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After Midnight

Jude wandered around the room trailing her fingers along the counter as Tommy played fragmented tunes on the piano. The hotel bar had closed an hour ago and Tommy had sweet talked his way in, saying he needed to use the piano. She sat down beside him and watched as his fingers danced across the keys.

"So are you gonna play a whole song or don't you know any?" He grinned at her and his fingers caressed the ivories playing a melody she had never heard. She closed her eyes and listened, hearing something special coming from his hands. She opened her eyes and stared at him as the notes faded away.

"Do you have lyrics?" He started again and added his voice to the melody.

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I wandered through fiction to look for the truth

Buried beneath all the lies

And I stood at a distance to feel who you are

Hiding myself in your eyes

And hold on before it's too late

We'll run 'til we leave this behind

Don't fall, just be who you are

It's all that we need in our lives

And that risk that might break you

Is the one that would save you

A life you don't live is still lost

So stand on the edge with me

Hold back your fear and see

Nothing is real 'til it's gone

And hold on before it's too late

We'll run 'til we leave this behind

Don't fall, just be who you are

It's all that we need in our lives

So live like you mean it

Love 'til you feel it

It's all that we need in our lives

So stand on the edge with me

Hold back your fear and see

Nothing is real 'til it's gone

Hold on before it's too late

We'll run 'til we leave this behind

Don't fall, just be who you are

It's all that we need in our lives

She leaned in and kissed him lingeringly. Jude was impressed that he had done this on his own.

"Nice..." She said.

"What the kiss or the song?" He asked in amusement.

"Both." He tickled her, making her laugh.

"It's really good Tommy. But what are you going to do with it? It deserves to be heard."

"Jude you know I can't." She touched his forehead with her own.

"Not yet, but you will." Jude said with no doubt in her voice.

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Paris Calls

Jude and Tommy were snuggled up on the couch in his hotel room, after their concert, watching a movie. He reached out and plucked a strawberry from the tray and popped it into her mouth. She nipped at his fingers playfully as she bit into the ripe fruit. He realized with a start that this was the first time he had ever just hung out and watched a movie with a girl. He was never bored around her, because something about her changed his environment in ways he still did not understand. It reminded him of that conversation they had had about the sunset. She took a glass of champagne from the side table and sipped at it, the bubbles going to her nose. Tommy watched her as she laughed so engrossed in the movie, she didn't notice him staring at her. As he was about to kiss her the phone rang. He unwrapped himself from her and stood up to answer it.

"Oh...Hey baby. Yeah I miss you too." Jude stiffened for an instant before she got up, turned the television off and walked out onto the balcony. He wanted to go after her, but Portia was still speaking. This was the first time Jude had been in his room when the Portia had called. Half the time he was in her room or they were out doing something, so he hadn't actually spoken to his wife in 3 weeks. "No I didn't get any messages. You know how it is. We're gone before they even get a chance to see us."

"Yeah I've been busy." He listened halfheartedly.

"How's Paris?" He saw Jude leaning against the railing looking out at the city lights. "Good. Look I need to go. I'm meeting the guys for drinks." He didn't want Jude to start doubting them again. "Yeah I know it's late..." He said a little annoyed. "Alright I'll talk to you soon."

He walked over to her and stood beside her at the railing. The panoramic view stretched out before them, but neither of them really noticed.

"What are you thinking about big eyes?" She looked up at him and shrugged.

"Why did you marry Portia?" Her voice only held curiosity and not the sadness he feared.

"Does it matter?" Of course it mattered. He knew that. It was just that he didn't want to discuss something that could effect their relationship. He started to mumble out a slightly convoluted story about Darius and taco commercials.

"What?! Did you just say you slept with Portia because Darius made you do a taco commercial?" He ducked his head in embarrassment.

"No I slept with Portia because I liked her and she was there and willing. It was an added bonus that D. didn't want me seeing her." She waited for him to elaborate. " I _married_ her because I was piss drunk and really pissed at Darius for making me do a taco commercial." She gave him a disbelieving look. He had to be joking! Right? That was not the Tommy she thought she knew. She felt herself feeling bad for the other woman when she would rather not be thinking about her at all. " It's not like I planned it Jude. You have to believe that much." He didn't want her to turn away in disgust at his actions because her opinion mattered too much. "I was angry and Portia got drunk with me one night. We were in Vegas and I don't even really remember what happened." Jude's eyes grew incredulous. Tommy sighed and looked over at Jude.

"You don't remember getting married..." Jude uttered in shock. He shook his head.

"Little pieces here and there, but I didn't even know about it until we saw the marriage certificate the next morning."

"Then why stay married to her?" This was the question he had been dreading and she had wanted to ask since he had admitted he had never loved Portia.

"Jude you know Darius. If I hurt his baby sister, he'll ruin my career and yours too, if he finds out about us." He pulled her into his arms then and she went willingly, knowing it was where she had to be.

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Same Old Song and Dance

Just another fight, countless in the scheme of Boyz Attack history. Tommy shook his head angrily, knowing Chaz would never listen, would never change. Their music could be so much better, but over synthesized beats and mediocre lyrics were all they wanted to offer. Jude watched him pace the room angrily and she stayed silent. She couldn't force him to see that he would never grow as an artist if he stayed with the band. He had to figure it out on his own.

"Tommy..." He looked up as if surprised she was there. He walked over to her and she pulled him down onto the bed. Her lips met his hard unyielding ones, but she knew exactly how to press down to make his respond.

His hands tangled in her long hair and his anger was directed towards more pleasurable pursuits. He took off their clothes quickly, his hands urgent on her tender flesh. She moaned into his mouth, as he pulled away to put on a condom. His hands grasped her hips, as he sat legs outstretched on the bed, and he lifted her onto his arousal, her legs spread out on either side of him. As he lowered her down, the press of him against her swollen flesh made her gasp as he thrust up quickly, pushing her down. She held onto his shoulders as he moved against her, her breasts pressed against his hard chest, nipples rubbing against his skin. Their eyes locked as their connected bodies rubbed and ground against each other. Their mouths met in a hungry kiss, as sensations intensified, with his every upward thrust. She pushed her hips forward, rubbing her clit against him, the friction bringing her closer to the edge. He grasped her ass with both hands and lifted her, then pushed her down harder against him. She cried out and bit down on his shoulder, as she felt her muscles start to tighten.

"Look at me." Her wild eyes met his, as he pushed his lower body against hers, sliding against her sensitive flesh, making her lose her breath. She was so close to the edge and then she was free falling. He slipped out of her and pushed her onto her back, entering her wet heat again in one swift motion. He took her mouth as his lower body mimicked his thrusting tongue. She was all sensation as he pounded into her and he finally surrendered to release on a moan against her neck. He rolled off of her and his hand found her wet heat, knowing she had been close to going over again. He circled with his thumb as his fingers entered her, causing her hips to jerk off the bed. His fingers thrust against her G-spot, while his thumb worked her clit and her hands grasped the sheets, as she felt the pleasure building. It hit her all at once as her inner muscles convulsed around his fingers hard, and his thumb became to much against her most sensitive spot. She twisted away from his hand and collapsed onto his chest.

"Do you feel better now?" She grinned up at him. He gave a short laugh.

Later on as their bodies cooled they started talking about Tommy's problem.

"You heard that song Jude. Boyz Attack could be so much better then just another boy band."

"You've been with them for years Tommy, maybe you're just growing in different directions."

"That's the problem Chaz doesn't want to grow. He just wants things to stay the same. I don't want to be still be shaking my ass at 20." Jude giggled earning a frown from him.

"Not even for me?" She asked sweetly. He just shook his head unable to stay angry in her arms. She put her chin on his chest and looked up at him.

"Have you thought any more about going solo?"

"I did...But Darius still has me under contract for another year."

"So why can't you work on a solo album?"

"Because Boyz Attack is a platinum guarantee. He probably wouldn't give anything I worked on a chance."

"So work on something he'll bury."

"What?!" He said lifting his head to look at her.

"Work on your own stuff on your own time."

"And give Darius a crap album he'd never release. It's a nice idea anyway. But I don't know..."

"I'd help you any way I could. I got your back." He looked into her eyes and for the first time in his life really believed someone did.


	16. Chapter 16

_This chapter is short, but should be pretty interesting!_

**Chapter 16**

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Last Bus Out

She woke up in his arms and smiled into the sapphire eyes looking down at her. They were in her cramped bedroom on the bus headed to the next city on the tour. Tommy couldn't wait to get to the hotel, because Jude had a hang-up about having sex with SME so close by. She had let him have her in a public bathroom, but not in the privacy of a bedroom. He thought it was so cute. They were spending more time together than they had before because Portia's return was just a few days away. They tried not to talk about it and instead enjoy what remaining freedom they had. He didn't want to waste a moment without her. He lowered his head and brushed his lips against hers. Soon the light touch was not enough and he deepened the kiss as his hand slid underneath her t-shirt. He groaned as she quickly stopped his progress.

"Tommy!"

"Please Jude, just a little..." She laughed as he tried to kiss her neck. She rolled away from him and got up. He pouted at her as he watched her from the bed as she put on a pair of shorts. "Jude."

"Hmm?"

"I love you don't forget." He didn't know why he felt compelled to remind her.

"I love you too Tommy Q." She bent down and tangled her hand in his messy hair, bringing her lips to his. As he started to wrap his arms around her waist she pulled back out of his reach. She shook her head at him.

"You'll have to be good, if you want me to be good... later..." He arched an eyebrow at her provocative words.

"Baby I like it better when you're bad." He reached up and grabbed her hand, pulling her down before she could even react. His body covered hers, preventing any chance of escape. He persuaded her with mouth, tongue, hands and teeth until she didn't care if even Dave heard her screaming Tommy's name.

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The Surprise

Portia spied her handsome husband by the refreshment table and started walking towards him a smile on her lips. She had missed him so much these few months, but Paris had been an amazing experience. She had flown back as soon as classes were over, wanting to surprise him. She had just dropped her stuff off at the hotel and found out the band was here rehearsing. Her steps stopped suddenly when she noticed what he was doing. He had just poured coffee into a Styrofoam cup, which wasn't unusual since she knew he loved coffee. The part that made her stop was the fact that he was adding cream and sugar to it. She knew he drank it black.

A slender blond haired girl dressed casually walked over to him and put her hand on his arm. She had on tight jeans and a red tank top, not Tommy's usual choice of one night stand. Her husband normally liked them decked out in tight skin baring outfits with perfect hair and perfect makeup. He turned and smiled at the girl, handing her the cup. She could see how intently Tommy was focused on her, as he hung on her every word. The flirting didn't really surprise her. Portia knew Tommy had probably not been faithful while she'd been away, but _she_ was the one he had married and _she_ was the one he would come home to. There were always so many willing groupies hanging around the tours and he couldn't help but take what was offered.

This was different though. Portia had never seen her husband be tender with anyone or considerate of their needs. Her blood froze as she watched their body language for another moment before going over to them. A man coming from the stage, saw Portia watching the couple. He grinned as she walked over to join them. _Let the games begin._ He thought to himself. He watched as Portia introduced herself to Jude.

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And The Games Began

Jude put her hand on Tommy's arm, their skin tingled where it met. He turned and smiled giving her that look that he saved only for her. He handed her the coffee and she smiled back.

"Thanks." She took a sip, still surprised sometimes that he remembered exactly how she liked it.

"So did you ever find Wally?" Jude laughed. Wally, Kyle, J.P. And Bruno had all gone out last night. Everyone found their way back except Wally.

"He showed up at 10 this morning with his clothes all torn up. Apparently he passed out on someone's lawn and their poodle attacked him." They were both laughing when a woman walked up to them. Tommy's face froze and Jude seeing his look dropped her arm. Jude turned to look at the newcomer, who proceeded to lean up and kiss Tommy lingeringly on the mouth.

"Portia I didn't think you were coming back till the end of the week..." Tommy croaked out. Portia gave him a dazzling smile.

"I wanted to surprise you babe." Portia turned to get a closer look at the girl who her husband was interested in.

"Hi I'm Portia Quincy. Tommy's wife." She held her hand out for Jude to shake. The girl looked uncomfortable as she took it and quickly dropped it.

"I'm Jude Harrison." Portia thought she knew that name from somewhere, but couldn't place it. Jude felt an arm drape across her shoulders and turned her head expecting to see Spied, but it was Chaz gazing back at her. Tommy stiffened visibly, at Chaz touching_ his_ girl.

"Hey Portia... Welcome back. I see you've met my girl." Chaz said smiling at Jude who gave him a weak smile in return. Portia relaxed, thinking she had gotten it all wrong. "You're looking fine as usual. Paris definitely agreed with you." He said eying her up and down. She was wearing a tight expensive black dress, Black stilettos, gold hoops and a gold belt lending the perfect touch to her outfit. Jude felt under dressed in comparison, as if meeting her lover's wife wasn't awkward enough.

"Chaz Blackburn and monogamy. Wow. I never thought I'd see the day."

"Hey if Tommy here can do it so can I. Sometimes you just find the one that's worth it." Chaz saw Tommy jerk slightly at his words, and grinned internally. They exchanged pleasantries, although Tommy was pretty silent, even when Portia linked her arm through his.

"Hey I got an idea. Why don't we all go out for dinner tonight to celebrate your return Portia? Someplace nice. My treat." Chaz suggested. He knew it would be bad for the band if Portia actually found out about Tommy and Jude, but he could still have a little fun making Tommy squirm. Spending time with Jude was also high on his list of priorities.

"That sounds great Chaz." Portia answered for the both of them. Chaz turned his head to smile at Jude.

"You have something to wear babe? I'd love to take you shopping..." She nodded quickly.

"I'm all set..." She half mumbled. Thank God E.J. Had made sure she brought a couple of dresses with her and Sadie had also left her a couple before she had gone home. Because Chaz taking her shopping would probably have caused World War 3 between him and Tommy. Jude forced a bright smile that didn't reach her eyes as she looked at the other woman. "It's been great to meet you Portia, but I have rehearsal with my band now. I'll meet you guys in the hotel lobby tonight?" Jude ducked out of Chaz's embrace.

"8 good for everyone?" Chaz asked and they all nodded their heads. Jude walked away quickly, her heart in her throat.


	17. Chapter 17

_Thanks for all the reviews guys! It makes me want to post sooner too. ;)_

**Chapter 17**

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Quality Time

Portia linked her fingers through Tommy's as they walked into the hotel. She felt the absence that she had not seen earlier. She turned her head towards him and he didn't notice, seeming distracted.

"Where's your wedding ring?" He looked down at their joined hands and shrugged.

"You know Darius doesn't like me wearing it." She stopped walking before he did and he turned for their confrontation.

"Since when do you listen to Darius?" Tommy looked into her eyes and finally nodded.

"You're right...As always beautiful." And he gave her a small peck on the forehead as they continued up to their room.

They entered the room to see Portia's luggage placed discreetly to one side. When she had come up earlier to freshen up she had not realized that none of Tommy's things were here. Tommy walked over to the couch and sat down, flopping his feet on the coffee table. He reached for the remote and had the T.V. On leaving Portia to unpack her things.

"Where's all of your stuff?" She asked and he looked up at her with an unreadable expression.

"I didn't have time to bring it up from the bus this morning." She nodded accepting his answer as she unzipped a suitcase.

"Don't you think you should get it? We have dinner in a little while..." He stood up quickly, knowing this was the opportunity he had been waiting for.

"I'll be right back." And he headed out before she had a chance to say anything else.

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Reality Intruding

He went to the bus first to find a suit to wear from his suitcase and then he went up the 7th floor. They were lucky Boyz Attack had all been put on the 10th floor. When Tommy entered her room, his eyes went immediately to her sitting on the bed, staring at the T.V. Her startled gaze jumped to his as he walked in and sat down beside her. His hand covered her fingers and he searched her eyes to try and figure out what she was thinking.

"I don't know if I can do this tonight..." She finally said as her eyes closed, shutting him out. He caressed her cheek with the back of his hand.

"I'm sorry..." He whispered and pressed his lips to her softly. Her arms flew around him in an involuntary gesture and he held her breathing in her unique scent. "Are you okay?" He asked. She nodded. "Because if you don't go it'll look suspicious."

"I know..." She let her arms fall from around him and he stood up. He went over to his bag that he had placed in the room earlier and rummaged for his shaving kit. He opened it up and took a ring out. He turned and showed it to Jude.

"She asked..." Jude nodded jerkily.

"You better get going." He walked over and gave her one more kiss, resting his forehead against hers.

"I love you." He murmured before standing up again. Tommy took his things and walked out with guilt gnawing at his stomach. It was like nothing he had ever felt before.

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Always the One

She exited the elevator reluctantly. She had waited as long as possible, before making her way down to the lobby. It was exactly 8 as her heels found the marbled floor. She self-consciously, made her way towards the foyer, as two men gazed at her mesmerized. She had on a silver blue silk dress that matched her eyes to perfection. It had a cowl neckline, tight in the bodice and flaring out at the skirt to below her knees. On her feet were a sexy pair of silver high heeled sandals, with straps wrapping around the ankles. Her hair was pushed back, revealing her slender white neck. Tommy had never seen her dressed up before and it was almost like a shot to the heart. She walked up to them, standing beside Chaz. Chaz took advantage of her proximity and placed his hand possessively on the small of her back, her bare back. The back of Jude's dress was made up of only two crisscrossed straps to hold the bodice in place. She had to fight the natural urge to step away from him. Tommy saw the touch and was ready to rip Chaz's arm out. Tommy's hand tightened involuntarily.

"Baby if beauty were time, you'd be an eternity." Jude looked at him not quite believing he would say anything so cheesy and had to laugh. Chaz kissed her cheek as they turned back to the other couple.

"You guys are so cute." Portia said.

"We should get going." Tommy said glaring at Chaz behind Portia's back. They went outside to meet the 2 cars Chaz had hired. Tommy watched as Chaz helped Jude into the first one.

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Champagne, Subterfuge and Soufflé

They were seated at the best table in the best restaurant in the city. The paparazzi outside had snapped pictures of the 2 couples coming in and were waiting patiently for them to leave. Chaz sat down beside Jude with Tommy across from her and Portia across from Chaz. Chaz immediately ordered 2 bottles of Dom Perignon. Jude quickly took a sip as it was served by the waiter. Chaz and Portia held up the conversation after they had all ordered. Jude and Tommy both tried hard not to look at the other. Jude found herself taking a another drink of the bubbly beverage as she listened half heartedly to Portia talking about Paris.

"Jude you have to taste this it is amazing." Chaz moved his fork in front of her mouth with a piece of salmon on it. She tried to turn her head.

"No thanks. I'm good."

"Oh come on this is the best salmon I've ever had." He waved the fish in front of her face again.

"Leave her alone man. Jude hates fish." Tommy finally said. 3 pairs of eyes turned to him at his outburst. Portia of course wondered why Tommy would know something like that, when he couldn't even be bothered to remember her birthday. Chaz put his fork back on his plate and looked embarrassed.

"Really?" Jude gave a small nod. The tension was palatable as the they all turned their attention back to their various meals. Jude took another gulp of champagne, picking at her food, but not actually eating much. Tommy frowned at her, noticing the amount she was drinking. Chaz refilled her glass and she gave him a small smile.

"So did you catch our new dance routine today? I think it's better than the old one." Jude coughed on the liquid she had just brought to her mouth as Tommy looked at her amused, waiting to hear what she would say. She bit her inner lip, trying hard not to laugh as she caught the sparkle in Tommy's eyes.

"I need to use the restroom." She blurted out and quickly got up leaving them, practically running towards the Ladies room. Chaz gave them a baffled look, not understanding what had set her off.

"I'll check on her." Portia volunteered and got up to go after her.

Jude stood in front of the mirror and burst into hysterical laughter. The tension of the night had taken its toll on her, combined with the champagne she had drunk. The door swung open and she saw Portia walk in. Portia stood next to her and took some lip gloss out of her purse to freshen her make up.

"What's so funny?" Jude explained how she had never actually been able to watch the Boyz perform. Portia started laughing too.

"Not once? You've been on the road with them for months!"

"I know I know. Just don't tell Chaz." Portia nodded and looked over at her.

"So you and Chaz huh? You don't seem like the type to date him. You know he's got a reputation?" Jude shrugged.

"I really didn't plan on getting together with anyone one this tour." Jude said truthfully. "I even promised myself I wouldn't get involved with another industry guy." Recognition dawned in Portia's eyes.

"Jude Harrison... I knew your name sounded familiar."

"What?!" Jude fairly squeaked. What could Portia have heard all the way in Paris?!

"You were Shay's girl." Jude's shoulders relaxed.

"Yeah a longtime ago..." Portia put away her make up and started to wash her hands.

"I forgot to mention I love your dress." Jude looked down at the dress Sadie had bought for her.

"Thanks. My sister got it for me. I don't have any fashion sense. I like your necklace." Jude admired the gold chain with a round pendant hanging off of it, around Portia's neck. Portia touched it briefly.

"Traditional Quincy guilt gift." Jude's eyes widened. "First time he cheated on me..."

"Don't you worry? I mean with all these groupies hanging around?" Jude finally asked.

"He might flirt with them, hell he even might sleep with them, but I'm the one he comes home to." Jude's face grew pale at the other woman's words.

"We should probably get back out there before they come in looking." Jude said and they made their way out to the table.

Tommy watched Jude closely as she became more giggly as the night progressed. Chaz kept his arm on the back of her chair and made sure to fill her glass when it was half full.

"Mmmm this soufflé is so good." Jude practically moaned as she put another bite to her lips. The action distracted both Chaz and Tommy.

"It's just dessert Harrison." Tommy said trying to stop her from her sexy little moans. Portia wondered why Tommy called Jude by her last name.

"How can you say that? Have you ever had it?" He shook his head. She looked at him in surprise.

"But you're French Quincy." Before Tommy could reply Portia spoke.

"How did you know Tommy was French?" It took Jude a moment to formulate a reply. Although she wasn't really as drunk as she appeared, the alcohol _had _slowed her responses.

"My sister Sadie is obsessed with Tommy Q. She must have told me..." Portia knew that Tommy had kept his past out of the media. No one really knew his background. "I mean she knew about your marriage and everything." Jude continued to over share. When lying less is better Jude. She mentally kicked herself.

Jude was a little wobbly by the end of the dinner and Chaz had his arm around her to keep her walking straight. As they walked out front the cameras almost blinded them with their flashes. They stood waiting for their hired cars as Chaz held onto Jude a little too closely. The first car pulled up and the driver got out to open the car door.

"I uh need to ask Chaz something." Tommy said to Portia and walked over to them. Jude had already gotten into the vehicle when Tommy made his way over.

"Don't touch her Chaz." Tommy warned through clenched teeth. Chaz smirked at him.

"You're _wife's_ waiting for you Tommy." Chaz got in and shut the door leaving Tommy standing on the sidewalk. Portia came over a minute later. She linked her arm through his and leaned against him.

"They make a cute couple don't they?" Their car pulled up then, saving Tommy from answering.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

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Muddled Truths and Mixed Motivations

"Hey you..." Chaz said smoothly as he slid in beside Jude on the leather seats.

"Hey." She said softly, her voice holding a surprising clarity. He looked into her eyes then, noticing the entirely too sober gaze she gave him, even in the dark recesses of the car. As they drove away, she continued to stare at him. "Why are you doing this Chaz?"

"Maybe I just want a chance to spend some time with you." She gave him a skeptical look showing him she didn't believe him for a minute.

"Why?"

"Sometimes...You can't help who you fall for." He said more seriously than she had ever heard him, repeating word for word what she had said to him when he first found out about her and Tommy and had confronted her on it. She searched his brown eyes with her own trying to find the truth of his words. She still wasn't sure when he gave a small self deprecating laugh, breaking the silence. "Okay pissing off Tommy doesn't hurt either." She believed that much about Chaz's motivation. "Hey you hungry? I know you didn't eat much at dinner." Jude frowned and thought about it. Now that her nerves had settled out of the presence of Portia, she found she was. She nodded and Chaz signaled the driver to pull over ahead.

Chaz helped Jude out of the car and they were standing at a hot dog stand, with picnic tables on the grass surrounding the parking area. White lights were strung along the trees.

"You sure know how to treat a girl." She teased.

"Hey I paid for a four star meal that you didn't even eat...And that champagne you swilled down was 250 a bottle." Jude's eyes widened.

"250?!" He chuckled at her reaction.

"You know Tommy might act like he hates being part of Boyz Attack, but he enjoys the benefits as much as the rest of us." He nodded towards her. "Like giving girls pretty things." Her hand went to the pendant, tucked underneath her dress and she frowned at him. A man pulled into the parking lot, stopping in the shadows. He had known in his gut there would be a better story if he followed them, than just getting pictures of the 2 couples double dating at a swanky restaurant.

Jude sat back on the picnic table, bare feet on the bench as Chaz ordered for her. She let the gentle breeze caress her skin and tried to enjoy the night instead of thinking about the love of her life in the arms of his wife. Chaz came up to her and handed her, her hot dog. He sat down beside her and watched her in surprise as she inhaled her food.

"Hey I've been on a bus with SME for months. I had to learn to fight for food." He laughed. "You know you're not so bad when you stop with that sleazy player act." He looked at her, not quite believing she actually had the stones to say that to him.

"You know Jude, Tommy and I really aren't that different." He could see she wanted to protest. "All I'm saying is, his past record is just as bad as mine. Ask him about Brianna some time. You're not even the first singer he's gotten involved with on this tour." He took his jacket off and put it around her shoulders as she stared into the darkness. He let Jude contemplate his words for a while before speaking again. "Jude I really like you." Jude frowned at him.

"Chaz I never thought I'd be saying this...But... I don't want to hurt you. Forget about me...I'm a lost cause."

"Hey looking after my heart is my job, not yours. Go on a date with me. You might actually like it." She shook her head and he knew she wouldn't change her mind right away. "Fine, but you still have to hang out with me." She whipped her head up ready to protest. "Portia will get suspicious if she never sees us together." There was a determined set to her jaw as she stared into his eyes sizing him up.

"I don't let anyone force me to do anything I don't want to Chaz." With that she stood up, and walked back towards the hired car, shrugging his jacket off onto the ground. He watched with admiration, as her small, finely defined frame got into the vehicle. He soon joined her and they rode in silence back to the hotel.

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That's New

Tommy changed out of his suit in the bathroom and came back out in a pair of jeans and a black tank top. Portia lay against the pillows, the long trip starting to take its toll on her. That was when Portia saw it for the first time, gracing his right bicep. There was a black swirl design, that made him look slightly dangerous. She was surprised he had not bothered to mention it to her.

"When did you get that?" She asked as she sat up a little. He walked over and sat down beside her.

"A few weeks ago. I liked the design." She put her fingers to his arm tracing the curves, but couldn't make anything out of it there were so many lines. It was different from anything she had ever seen before.

"I like it. It looks sexy..." She said huskily as she looked into his eyes. His eyes darted away from hers.

"Why don't you get some sleep. You look tired." She frowned slightly. They had been apart for months and he didn't even want to touch her.

"What about you?"

"I'm kind of wound up. I think I'll take a walk. Maybe see what the guys are up to..." Tommy leaned down and kissed her briefly as her eyes drifted shut. He reached over and shut off the nightstand light before getting up to leave the room.

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Not Letting Go

Tommy quickly glanced around the hallway to make sure no one was around before slipping the extra key card Jude had given him into her hotel room lock. He slid in quietly and turned to see her sitting on the bed waiting for him. She had sobered quickly, having not been nearly as tipsy as she had pretended.

"How could you let him put his hands all over you?" Jude stood up and glared at him.

"1.His hands were not all over me. 2. Like you're one to talk. You were with your WIFE!" He was an ass he realized. He had no right to be jealous. She had only gone along to ease Portia's suspicions after all. He pulled her towards him, but she didn't want to move. He tipped her face up to his to see the tears in her eyes.

"Hey...I'm sorry." He kissed her softly, but she did not respond. He looked at her again and did not like what he saw. She looked pained, but also resolved. Resolved for what? He didn't think he'd like the answer.

"Maybe it's time to let this go Tommy."

"Don't say it Jude." He shook his head. Was there a specific moment that she had become so important to him, he wondered. He could feel his heart aching at even the thought, of losing her.

"I went into this knowing you were married. I couldn't stay away from you." She said so sadly, a hint of desperation reflected in her voice. "But these last few months aren't real. You don't belong to me...We should just end..."

"No!" He interrupted, unable to let her say those last words.

"Why not?" Tears slid freely down her face now as he held her.

"I love you Jude." Her hands clung to him desperately as their lips met. When they pulled apart Jude still looked unsure.

"What about Brianna Tommy? Did you love her too?" His fists tightened by her sides.

"Chaz told you about her didn't he?" She shrugged. "She was just another willing fan Jude. It didn't mean anything..." She turned her head away.

"Do I...mean anything to you Tommy?" She whispered so softly, he had to strain to hear. Her words were like a blow to him. No one_ but _her had ever meant anything to him. He took her chin in his hand and forced her to look up at him.

"Tell me you actually think you mean nothing to me."

"I don't..." She started, but could not continue.

"Look me in the eye and tell me you really believe I don't love you, that these last few months didn't matter." She twisted her head out of his grasp and shook it, unable to look at him. "Say it Jude and I'll leave you alone." Her tear filled eyes looked into his desperate ones.

"Say it Jude." He said forcefully. She shook her head, knowing she couldn't say the words, knowing they would be a lie. His lips pressed against hers and her brain simply stopped fighting her heart. Her heart knew the truth, knew him on the deepest level as his had always recognized hers.

Her mouth opened to his tongue stroking softly, seducing slowly. His fingers were so gentle against her skin as he slid his hands under her t-shirt to cup her bare breasts. She lifted her arms for him as he pulled her shirt off. She watched him as he took his own tank top off quickly. Tommy reached for her and their chests pressed together, skin to skin as his lips found hers again. She went pliantly as he pushed her against the sheets, his weight heavy on hers. She cradled his hips between her own, and could feel the rough denim against her thin shorts. Her hands went to his ass pulling him closer as he thrust against her, the friction making her gasp. He got off her suddenly and stood up to get rid of his jeans and boxers, before sliding down next to her. He inched her shorts and panties off, kissing the exposed flesh as he went.

He spread her thighs with his hands, opening her lips to his tongue, flicking against her sensitive nub. He heard her breath catch as he sucked on the small cluster of nerve endings. When he looked up she was staring at him. He slide up her body and kissed her again angling his head to meld his mouth to hers perfectly. Her hips raised, as she brushed her lower body against his arousal, trying to align him to her. He pulled back and reached for a condom in the nightstand, sheathing himself quickly. The tip of him grazed her opening and she pushed her hips up, needing him deep inside her.

Tommy slid in slowly as he caught Jude's gaze, heard her gasp as his hardness stretched her inner muscles impossibly wide. He went slow, pushing deep and withdrawing almost all the way before pushing his way back in. Her legs wrapped around his waist, as continued to stroke into her tight, swollen flesh. Their eyes met and he drowned in her blue orbs as his body pushed in and out of her. He saw her eyes darken as she began to feel the building pleasure and he thrust harder and faster, wanting to go at the same time. As her muscles clamped down on him, he felt the edges of sanity blurring as his own body exploded in unparalleled sensation. His body pinned hers down against the mattress as his head rested against the curve of her shoulder. Her arms wrapped around him, as he shifted so not all his weight was pressing her down. She slung one leg over his possessively and he stroked the bare thigh with his hand as his lips rested against her soft skin.

He got up finally to get rid of the condom in the bathroom and came back to see her curled against a pillow in the fetal position. He slid in beside her and his fingertips lightly touched the tattoo at her hip. His, it said clearly to him. Just like he was hers. He wrapped his body around hers, holding her tight as he listened to her breathing slow.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

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Love Song

Jude woke up slowly, feeling his absence immediately. She turned her head and saw the note lying on his pillow, with a single red rose on top of it. She reached for the paper, leaving the rose on the linen.

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Because days come and go

But my feelings for you are forever

She could already hear the music that would accompany those lyrics as she got up to shower his scent off her skin.

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Comfort

Portia followed Tommy to the arena for a quick rehearsal that morning, for the show later that night. As they stood waiting for the other members to show, she saw a couple in the distance, standing close, looking pretty intimate.

"What's going on over there?" She asked in puzzlement. Tommy turned to see Spied and Jude in a tight embrace. He hated Spied in that moment with a blind intensity, not because the kid was moving in on Jude, but because he was doing something Tommy could not. Spied was comforting Jude who was hurting, hurting because of Tommy.

"They used to date." Tommy said distractedly. It wasn't the first time Portia noticed how much Tommy seemed to know about Jude. Had they hooked up at one point? But that still didn't explain why he remembered details about the girl. The Tommy Quincy she knew, when it came down to it only cared about himself.

"Well Chaz better watch out... because it doesn't look like they're done with each other." The last thing he needed to be reminded of was Chaz.

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Goldmine

Tommy was waiting in the hotel lobby for Portia to come downstairs so that he could take her to lunch, when he spotted Chaz. He walked over to the other man, ready to confront him. He had been ready all day, but there had been too many people around at rehearsal that morning. Jude had reluctantly told him everything last night when he had pressed her, knowing she had been keeping something from him.

Portia stepped out of the elevator, her eyes scanning for the familiar dark hair. She spotted him talking heatedly to Chaz. Tommy had always had a hot temper since she had known him, so she started forward quickly, hoping to diffuse the situation. As she neared them Tommy's fist went up and connected with Chaz's face whipping his head back. Hotel security had been called when the desk workers had seen the argument escalate. Chaz's punch went wild, barely grazing Tommy's jaw. Portia moved between them her palms pressing on both their chests before they could hit each other again.

"Stop it!" She screamed, knowing there was nothing she could do to prevent more bloodshed. Security guards showed up then and pulled both men back. The lone reporter who had been haunting the lobby got the goldmine of pictures in this scene. And the headlines would read: **Boyz Attack Love Triangle**. There would also be confirmation of Lil' Tommy Q's marriage to Portia in the form of the wedding ring on his finger caught on camera.

When Portia asked what the fight was about, Tommy had refused to answer and she had known it would be a bad time to press him, when he was still so angry. He told her he needed to be alone, to calm down and that she should go to lunch without him. She let him go reluctantly, sensing more trouble coming.

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Salvation

She opened the door at his knock and she took his hand pulling him in to close the door behind them. His arms were around her holding her tight and she remained silent, holding him too. His arms finally relaxed from around her and when she took his hands she saw the knuckle starting to swell. Jude did not say anything as she took ice from the bucket and wrapped a towel around it, holding it to his bruised knuckles. Her other hand found his cheek, touching it softly and he turned his head to kiss her palm. He walked them over to the couch and sat down, pulling her onto his lap and still neither of them felt the need to speak. He pressed his forehead against hers and let the anger drain away, unable to linger, in her presence.

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Realization

Portia watched them from the side of the stage as Tommy started to sing. Kwest came up beside her and she turned to him.

"I never knew he could sing like that."

"None of us did..."

"How long have they been doing this?" Kwest hoped she was simply asking about the song.

"A few weeks after Jude joined the tour. I don't know any details. You'd have to ask Tommy." She nodded as her attention turned back to the couple. Kwest slipped away as she watched them. They played to the audience, her turning away from him and then coming back to sing the chorus. They stood close, their movements completely in sync, like they had done this a hundred times before. Portia had heard Jude's entire set with Tommy by her side, until this song, when he had left her to walk on stage without telling her why.

"Back to defend your territory huh?" Portia saw Diana, one of the back up dancers for Boyz Attack. She knew the girl did not like her and guessed it was because Tommy had married her. Everything fell into place at Diana's words, the fight, the way Tommy knew so much about Jude, the way Chaz and Jude just didn't seem to fit. "Wow they could light the stage with the electricity they generate." Diana said trying to instigate. She didn't like Portia for the reason guessed. Tommy had slept with her just once and never looked back even though she had given him every opportunity. He had married Portia a week after their little encounter. Diana walked away with a extra sway in her step, a grin on her face, knowing she had put doubts into the other woman's mind.

Portia had noticed when they had walked into the building, that Tommy hadn't given the scantily clad girls with the backstage passes a second glance. She had to convince herself that this was just another one of his flings, but doubts crept in as she watched them finish Broken. Tommy took Jude's hand automatically and they bowed. He pulled her off stage, both of them high from the adrenaline of performing. When Tommy spotted Portia he looked surprised as if he had forgotten she was there. He dropped Jude's hand and she joined her band leaving them alone. Tommy looked into Portia's eyes, but she would not give anything away. She needed all the information she could gain. She smiled at him, throwing him off guard.

"You were amazing." She kissed him until he pulled away.

"I need to go change." She nodded and watched him walk off. Portia was his wife and once his affair had run its course, he would come right back into her arms as he had every other time. She wasn't sure why she loved Tom Quincy so much to let him continue to do this to her, but she wouldn't give him up without a fight.


	20. Chapter 20

_Since the last chapter was kind of short I decided to post today. ENJOY!_

**Chapter 20**

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Assignations

Tommy was busy flirting with one of the groupies after the show, when Portia came up to him and spoke into his ear soft and low. She wanted him to meet her back at the hotel room as soon as he was done there so they could spend some much needed time together. He nodded and smiled at her, knowing he had no choice but to agree. She gave leaned over and they shared a lingering kiss before she left. As soon as he was sure Portia was gone, he headed back to the hotel too, knowing she wouldn't be expecting him for a couple of hours. It might be the only opportunity to see how Jude was holding up.

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And Brandy Was Her Flavor

He slipped into her room expecting to find her watching T.V. Or working on a song, all he found was emptiness. He figured SME must have taken her somewhere to take her mind off of things. He sat down on the couch and clicked on the television to wait.

One hour passed and no sign of Jude. Then two and she still wasn't back. He kept telling himself 10 more minutes and he would go back to his own room to see Portia. It was almost 1:30 in the morning when he heard the key card in the door. Tommy stood up quickly and went over to open it to see Kyle and Wally on either side of Jude holding her up. She gave him a glassy eyed smile and at the glare Tommy directed at the boys, they let her go leaving Tommy to catch her before she wound up on the carpet. She clung to him and he could smell the alcohol permeating off her skin. Before Tommy could ask Kyle or Wally anything they had scurried off, knowing better than to answer anything Tommy wanted to know.

"Tommy..." She said happily as her arms stayed wrapped around his neck. He half dragged her, half carried her into the room and dropped her onto the bed, sitting down beside her. He had never seen her quite this drunk before and he didn't normally find drunk girls all that attractive, but this was Jude and she was cute.

"Jude why is your lipstick all smudged?" He asked noticing the smears against her ivory skin. Had someone been hitting on her?

"Brrrrannndy..." She mumbled as her lips found his neck. He pulled her back and looked at her.

"You were drinking brandy?" He hadn't known she liked hard alcohol.

"No.. silly...kissed Brandy...Kyle was rigghtt..." He raised his eyebrows in shock. Wait! What?!

"Where exactly did SME take you tonight?"

"Diivaa's.." She named a well known gentleman's club.

"They took you to a strip club?!"

"Thought they'd be skanky, but... they were nice..." She gave a very un-Jude like giggle. Tommy didn't know whether to laugh or find SME and kill them. Then the idea of Jude kissing another girl hit and his blood rushed South.

"How'd you wind up kissing 'Brandy' then?" He asked, voice a little rough.

"Kyle shaid...girls had shofter lips than guys...and I said no way! Your lipsh are so shoft..." Her eyes riveted on his full lips. "Annnywayyyy...We were taking body shots off Brandy and I...asked if I could kish her..." Tommy's half arousal, suddenly sprung to full attention. He groaned as her hand found his inner thigh. "Can I tell you a secret?" He nodded. "Watching them dance made me... horny..." She admitted in a low whisper. Her lips were suddenly nuzzling his neck and he thought he would come right then! He took her hand off his thigh and pushed her onto the pillows. He was not going to do this. He was not going to have sex with Jude when there was no way she would remember it in the morning. Not that he had never done it with drunk girls before, but this was Jude. She made it difficult to concentrate though as he took her shoes off, and unbuttoned her jeans to pull them down her legs. She had on a lacy blue thong that made his mouth water. Okay maybe he could just touch her a little...

"Tommy...?" She whispered, and he moved beside her. "I don't feel so good..." She pouted. He sighed, knowing he must really love her and pulled her off the bed, supporting most of her weight because she couldn't seem to stand, and took her into the bathroom. She sank down beside the toilet and soon the contents of her stomach hit the white porcelain as he held her hair back. He tried not to look or breathe as she finally finished and he flushed the toilet as she sat back. He stood her up and handed her some mouthwash. He had to thank God for small miracles as she was apparently now sober enough not to drink it and instead swished it around before spitting it out. He wiped her mouth with a damp wash cloth and sat her back down, knowing this was not over yet, having quite a bit of experience in this area. After one more round she put her head in his lap as he sat back against the wall. He stroked her hair away from her sweaty neck, as she closed her eyes. Somehow they fell asleep that way.

Jude woke up groggily, head pounding. She was wrapped around Tommy, in a weird pretzel position, on a tile floor. It took her a full minute to realize they were in the bathroom. As she remembered the club, she wondered how Tommy had wound up here. He was supposed to spend time with Portia last night, which was one of the reasons SME had demanded she go out with them. Jude reached for Tommy's wrist and looked at the luxury watch on it, wanting to snort. It figured he would buy something that probably cost more than her car. Her eyes widened at the time though. It was 6:30 in the morning and she assumed Tommy had been with her all night. Her head pounded harder and she winced. She shook his shoulder hard and he opened his eyes disoriented for a second. He unbent himself from Jude and she fell onto the cold tile.

"Tommy it's 6:30..." She couldn't speak above a whisper, her mouth was so dry. He sat right up and ran his fingers through his hair. Portia was going to kill him! He looked over at Jude and his eyes softened. She looked exactly like she had been doing what she had last night. He stood up and filled a glass of water from the sink, grabbed some ibuprofen from her toiletry bag and handed both to her. She swallowed the pills and drank half the glass before handing it back to him. He pulled her up and they made their way back to the bedroom.

"How...How did you wind up here?" She asked confused as they sat down on the bed.

"I was waiting for you..."

"But what about Portia?" He sighed.

"I came back here early and wanted to make sure you were okay, but you weren't here."

"Oh..." Jude tried to remember last night, but only brief images flashed through her mind, including one of a pretty girl with short blond hair.

"I should really get going. I never made it back to the room."

"Tommy!"

"I know..." He kissed her softly and got up to leave. "Oh and next time I see you I want details about Brandy." He grinned and winked at her before shutting the door behind him. Who was Brandy? Jude wondered as she fell back onto the pillows.

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Forgotten

Tommy entered the room quietly, trying not to wake his wife. He saw the table still laden with covered plates and a bottle of champagne left in now melted ice in the bucket. He knew he had really screwed up this time as his eyes fell on Portia curled on the couch, wrapped in only a satin robe. He took the comforter off the bed and knelt to put it on her. Her red swollen eyes opened then to meet his.

"Tommy...?" She asked in a soft husky voice.

"Hey..."

"I...I thought something happened to you." Her eyes filled with tears and he found himself holding her as she sobbed into his chest. No matter what, he did care about Portia, and he hated that he had hurt her like this.

"Shh...I'm fine...J.P. Had too much to drink and I took him back to his room. I was tired. I must have crashed on his couch. I'm sorry I worried you" Portia didn't know if she believed him. It wasn't the first time he had made promises he hadn't kept.

"Don't ever leave me..." She begged and he brushed his hand along her tear stained cheek.

"Of course I won't..." He said willing to say almost anything to get her tears to stop even if he didn't mean the things he said. He held her for a longtime as she started to calm down, charming her with his words. He promised he would spend the next free day with her doing anything she wanted.

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Damage Control

He looked at the tabloids gracing his desk and frowned as the anger started to rise. One tabloid had a picture of Chaz and Jude sitting intimately next to each, with his jacket around her shoulders. That wasn't really important however, compared to the one with Chaz, Tommy and Portia in it. He grabbed the paper in his hands and crumpled it into a ball throwing it across the room. He would have to fix this before the tour was threatened.

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It Hurts

Jude got onto the bus later than morning with her hair back in a ponytail, no make up and a pair of sunglasses on that did not fit her face. Her head was still killing and her muscles ached. She remembered who Brandy was now and was on the warpath. The boys would pay for not stopping her. Not that she was the only one who had kissed a member of the same sex. She wondered if blackmail would be better.

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Fun, Sun, and Little Too Much Skin

Portia sat next to Tommy at a poolside table enjoying the warm day. He had a pair of sunglasses on, so she couldn't tell if he was staring at the pool area where Jude sat. Jude was wearing a pair of running shorts and a tank top, her feet dipped in the water, reading a Kurt Cobain biography. SME , Sean and Bruno horsed around in the pool and had been trying to get her to join them. She shook her head, since she wasn't wearing a bathing suit, the only one she had brought was a bikini and she couldn't exactly wear that in front of Portia. Spied swam up to her and started to flick her with droplets of water. She glared at him as he tried to convince her to get in once again, but she wouldn't budge. He finally took matters into his own hands as Sean swam up beside them. Spied grabbed Jude's book out of her hands and tossed it a few feet away, knowing she would kill him if he ruined it. Before she could get away the two boys each took a leg and pulled her straight in. She came up spluttering and splashed water at them as they made an escape. After dunking Sean and Spied under a few times, she got out. Her tank top had ridden up her flat belly and her water logged shorts had pulled the waistband down. When she turned her back Portia could see part of a black tattoo visible on the back of the girl's left hip. She couldn't be sure from this distance, but it looked awfully familiar as she turned her head towards her husband who had a blank expression on his face. Before Portia could get a better look, Jude had pulled her tank top down and picked up her book to head inside.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

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Sweet Revenge

Jude lit the smoke bomb and threw it in the empty trash can. She waved it around, and near the boys room, waiting for the bus to fill with a hazy cloud before pounding on their doors. She put the basket down to one side as she waited for them.

"Fire!" She yelled at the top of her lungs. "Get out guys! Fire!" Kyle, Spied and Wally all stumbled out. Kyle was only in boxers, Wally in tighty whities and a t-shirt and Spied was the only one in pajamas. Eww...Jude thought. They looked panicked as they saw the smoke, practically pushing each other out of the way to get to the front of the bus. Glad to know they would have looked out for her if it had been a real emergency. She rolled her eyes as they ran off the bus, Jude following behind slowly. She nodded at Dave and he shut the doors behind the boys. They rushed for the grass at the side of the road before turning and realizing Jude wasn't with them. That was when they noticed her still inside the bus. She waggled her fingers at them and smirked. They came back and started pounding on the door to be let in. The late night air was cold on their bodies.

Tommy looked out at the window as Ben slowed the bus down, seeing the other one stopped ahead. Tommy and Chaz were the only ones still awake and in the common area. He heard Ben radio Dave to make sure everything was alright. Dave said something about doing a favor for Jude and Tommy, Chaz and Ben started laughing when they drove by seeing SME in their underwear pounding on the bus doors. He would have to ask Jude how she had managed that one and he reminded himself never to piss her off.

Jude grinned and whipped out her cell phone as her band mates begged to be let back in, promising anything and everything. She snapped a few pictures and promptly sent one to Tommy before turning to Dave.

"Should we let them back in?" He winked at her and laughed.

"Well you don't want them getting sick." She nodded and he pulled the lever to swing the door open. She stepped to one side to let them pass. They ran up the steps, shivering and glaring at Jude as they made their way back to their rooms to get more clothes on.

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Guilt Intruding

They both sat on the couch in her dressing room, still only half dressed, Jude's leg slung over Tommy's. Their lovemaking had been great as always, but something about it didn't feel right to her. Deep down she knew what it was. She remembered how horrible it had been when she had found her father and his mistress together and now she was that woman, having clandestine quickies whenever they could find a chance. She moved her leg off of him and started searching for her clothes.

"What's wrong?" He could feel her shift in mood as if it was his own. She looked at him with troubled eyes. She shook her head, knowing he would not like what she had to say. She put her shirt and jeans on before meeting his eyes again.

"Maybe you should just tell her Tommy..." He just looked at her. "You're just hurting her ..." _And me_. She did not add.

"It's not that easy. What am I supposed to say Jude?"

"It's just two words Tommy...'We're over.'" His stunned eyes met hers. She couldn't possibly mean they were over could she? He reached for her and pulled her back down beside him, wrapping his arms around her, face in her hair.

"I'll tell her Jude. I promise." She closed her eyes, wishing she could believe him completely, letting him hold her anyway.

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The Other Woman

Portia stood up from the bed as Tommy entered the hotel room. She looked at him and just knew where he had been. Her hands balled into fists as she stared at him.

"Hey..." He said softly, not really looking at her. When she did not answer he raised his head to see the confrontational stance she held.

"Where were you?"

"With the guys."

"That's bull. You were with her!" He hated it when she got like this. It reminded him too much of his childhood when his mother had used that same tone of voice. His jaw hardened and he turned cold eyes on her.

"Who was I with Portia?" He said stonily. She either missed the signs or refused to acknowledge them in the face of her own anger. She had accepted when he cheated, but this was so much more. She would not lose.

"Jude!" He shook his head.

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"You have the same fucking tattoo Tommy! Why do you have to lie about it?!" This should have been the perfect opportunity to tell her the truth, but for some twisted reason he didn't.

"I can't talk to you when you're like this..." He started for the door.

"You're going back to her again aren't you?" She called from behind him. He did not answer as he slammed the door behind him. She crumpled onto the floor, more afraid of losing him than ever before.

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Damage Control Part II

Darius showed up without warning. He greeted his sister and took her out to lunch having not seen her in 4 months. Portia hid her unhappiness well, telling him all about Paris and everything she had learned. Darius had never approved of her and Tommy getting together. She would not be the one to confirm that he had been right all along, so she played the happy wife. After lunch it became all business as he called Chaz and Tommy into one of the hotel conference rooms where he and Portia were waiting. He ranted and raved as he was wont to do, not really phasing either of them as they just glared at each other from across the table. When he asked what the fight was about, knowing there was no way it was over his sister, neither of them would answer.

"I made you guys and I can ruin you! You are not going to screw up the last few weeks of this tour! Do you understand?!" The just nodded still silent, pissing him off even more. Tommy listened in shock, not realizing there was so little time remaining and his thoughts drifted to what would happen with Jude. Asia was the next stop, so he would have very little time between tours.

"Darius it was over nothing...They just needed to blow off some steam. They've been stuck together for months." Portia tried to calm her brother. He could be vindictive if crossed and he could make all of their lives hell. Darius looked over at his sister, knowing she was hiding something. He kept his thoughts to himself though and barked for them all to get out. They scrambled out with haste.

He was actually glad that Jude was seeing Chaz now, because there had been rumors about her and Tommy. Of course there were always rumors floating around about celebrities of their caliber. There was one that claimed that Bruno had decided to become a Buddhist monk and was donating all his worldly possessions to a charity. Darius snorted. As if...There was also a funny one about a trans-sexual claiming to be pregnant with Spied's baby. He wondered sometimes where the tabloids came up with these things. He had one more person to see, before his flight out tomorrow. His empire didn't run itself after all. He picked up the phone and dialed her room.

"Jude it's Darius. I need to see you. Now." He commanded and then hung up, sitting back to wait for the girl. She had turned out to be quite the surprise on this tour.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

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Things I'd Rather Not See

Two women each received a large bouquet of long stemmed red roses in identical cut crystal vases in their hotel rooms. The first woman brought the perfect blooms to her nose and inhaling deeply the delicate perfume, believed that this was evidence that he still cared. The second woman eyed the beautiful arrangement warily, her fingers touching the velvet soft petals only once before moving away from the flowers. She had never experienced this before, but she knew what it meant. The first woman's words echoed in her ears. _Traditional Quincy guilt gift. _She hadn't felt this particular mix of emotions in a long time. The song she had written back then to express those feelings fit just as well now. Jude picked up her acoustic guitar and settled on the couch to start the opening chords.

Tommy walked in as she started the second verse. The sound amazed him as she sang her heart out, her voice dripping with emotion. The acoustic was a perfect backdrop to this song and he wondered why she never did it this way in her concerts. He just stood there watching the back of her head, listening to the painful words. He was glad this song had not been written because of him, but wondered even more now than ever before who it was about.

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Oh my permission to sin

You might have started my reckoning

I've got a reason now to bury this alive

Another little white lie

As she finished the final verse, he walked around the couch to sit down beside her. She looked over at him in surprise, her eyes unguarded for a split second and he could see the confusion and hurt them. When she blinked they was gone, making him question if he had seen them at all.

"Hey..." She said softly. No matter what, seeing him always made her heart skip.

"Hey big eyes. You okay?" He touched the back of hand to her cheek and she closed her eyes leaning her head against him. "Was Skin written about a boyfriend?" He asked knowing jealousy when he felt it now. Had someone else meant that much to her that they could hurt her that badly. Her eyes opened and a hint of amusement was evident in them in response to his tone.

"It was about a guy..." He frowned. "But not the way you're thinking. I caught my dad fooling around on my mom in our living room a couple of years ago. Apparently it had been going on for a while too." He winced. "The worst part was he wanted me and Sadie to lie about it for him. I told him he had to tell her. She kicked him out as soon as she found out. He destroyed our family." Tommy took her hand stroked the soft skin with his. "That's why I didn't want to get together with you..."

"Jude..." His eyes softened, as he looked at her. He hadn't realized how hard their relationship had been for her, even at the beginning.

"Don't worry it's been a longtime. So what about you? Are your parents still together?" He explained that his dad had died when he was really young and his mother had been the one to raise him. He had found himself telling her things he had hidden from almost everyone else. She felt lucky that she had had a good family life for as long as she had as she heard how much harder his life had been. Tommy had never really had that, his Dad had died when he was so young. She felt herself feeling sorry for the little boy he had been. It made sense now why he usually didn't open up to anyone. He told her how he wound up with Boyz Attack after getting in trouble. She understood why he was having a hard time letting Portia and the band go now.

"So why don't you do Skin acoustically for your show? It's so powerful like that."

"That's why. It's too much for me sometimes. The only time I've done it acoustically was the first time I debuted it when I sang it to my father." He nodded and leaned over to rest his forehead against hers.

Their lips met in an unhurried open mouthed kiss and he angled his head to deepen it. He pressed her down onto the couch and they took their time kissing. He pulled himself off of her and they each got undressed their eyes locked. He looked down at her creamy skin and bent his head to kiss her neck Her hands pulled him down, until he was pressed against, her thighs cradling him. His kisses were what made her get into this mess in this first place, she thought with amusement. Neither of them needed much foreplay, with the powerful emotions that had been running through them diverted into passion. He reached for his wallet and pulled out a condom, putting it on quickly. Her hands grabbed his ass, pulling him close again as he entered her swiftly. She was so tight, and warm and wet, he groaned. Their bodies moved together so perfectly, none of it took any effort.

He pulled almost completely out of her and started short quick thrusts that hit her G- Spot just right, making her cry out. Her short nails dug into his upper arms as she kept her legs wide open for him. As the ripples of her inner muscles started, signaling her pending release, he pushed into her hard, making the strokes long and fast. She came on a small cry, as his lips found hers. She drank his mouth in as his own pleasure overwhelmed him. His weight was nice, as he fell on top of her. She held him against her, their heartbeats in sync. The roses were forgotten to the whispers of love he placed against her ear.

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Unexpected Friends

The tour was ending soon and things had not changed. Tommy spent time as much time as he could with Jude and enough with Portia to keep her if not satisfied, unable to complain too much. Jude's heart grew heavier as the days passed more quickly. Tommy wanted her to go to Asia with the tour, but she knew she couldn't, not with the things the way they were now. She was walking through the arena hallways when Chaz stopped her. They exchanged greetings and stood there for a moment in companionable silence.

"So the tour's almost over. Can I call you when you get back to Toronto?" Jude bit her bottom lip. She and Chaz had fallen into an easy almost friendship after their double date, stopped by full friendship only because they didn't spend much time together with the bad blood between him and Tommy. Chaz had stopped coming on to her and she actually found she liked his company.

"I don't know if that's really a good idea. You and I never really got along..."

"Fair enough." She started to walk away.

"You'll always be the one though." He called after her. She stopped and turned her head to look back at him. He had a cute grin on his face.

"The one what?" She said unable to resist the bait or a returning smile.

"The one that got away." She had to give a laugh at that and just shook her head, as she continued her exit. She called her cell phone number over her shoulder, not caring if he caught it.

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Boys and Their Toys

Tomorrow would be the last day of their tour and they were currently 1 and 1/2 hours from Vancouver, the Boyz Attack home base. Tommy walked around the stage area impatiently, wondering where his friend was. The dealership he had placed an order with right before the start of the tour had finally received his brand new car from Italy. He had loved the Alfa Romeo 8C Competizone ever since he had seen it in a car magazine. There had been one more rehearsal scheduled that day so he was unable to go pick it up himself from Vancouver sending Kwest in his place. He needed this, the ability to drive off, to forget about his job.

Things with him and Jude had grown tenser by small degrees and he was convinced they both needed to get away from it all for a while. Of course the need to show his girl his newest toy was high on his list of priorities too. He finally spotted Kwest who was grinning from ear to ear as he walked over to Tommy. He threw Tommy the keys and shook his head.

"That was freaking amazing." Tommy gave him a suspicious look. "She's fine. I didn't go that fast." Kwest lied easily. Tommy just rolled his eyes not believing his friend for a second and started to turn.

"Thanks man." He called over his shoulder as he went to find Jude.

"What's the hurry?" Kwest called after him.

"I'm taking my girl for a spin." Kwest knew who he meant and frowned. He didn't like the way Tommy was treating either woman and he could feel things were going to get worse real soon.

Jude was busy with SME working out some new tunes for her next album, when Tommy found her. She was reluctant when he asked her to go for a ride with him, but she never could seem to say no to him. He looked so cute and so excited to show her his new toy. He grabbed a hold of her hand and pulled her out of the room as she turned to give SME an apologetic look.

The news of the arrival of the car had already made its rounds among the crew members, including Portia. He had told her last night Kwest was going to get it for him. She was excited for Tommy, remembering how much he wanted it when he had ordered it all those months ago. She started looking for him, and froze when she saw him, walking out the back door of the arena, not alone, tugging a blond behind him. Portia had been the one to listen to him talk about the car nonstop after he had seen it in that magazine. He had had to pull some major strings to get it as quickly as possible and it actually hadn't been released in North America yet. Portia felt a nugget of hurt growing in her belly, but she told herself she only had to hang on a little while longer. The tour was over tomorrow and she was pretty sure Jude would not be joining them in Japan in a few weeks.


	23. Chapter 23

_Okay there is going to be a ton of drama coming up and this is the turning point coming up too. ENJOY! and thanks to everyone who's taken the time to review!_

Chapter 23

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The Day To Nowhere

They found the car parked in the V.I.P section, carefully, spaces away from any of the others. Jude could only whistle in pure admiration as she walked around it to take in the sleek curves. It was a metallic red, screaming look at me! Pull me over! I have too much money! Jude laughed at the thoughts in her head. This was so typical Tommy, but she could see why he had wanted this car so badly. Her fingers slide along the smooth surface as he clicked the unlock button. Tommy admired the car and her, his two favorite girls. He went around and opened the door for her, surprising her as he leaned down for a quick kiss before she got in.

As she belted herself in, the car started, not with a purr, but with a roar of the V8 engine that got even Jude's blood pumping. She did drive a vintage muscle car herself after all. He put his sunglasses on and they sped out of the parking area. As they drove down the country roads, he linked his fingers with hers and place their joined hands on his thigh, only letting go when he needed to shift. It was a beautiful Fall day, with sun shining and leaves starting to turn. Their silence was companionable, which had always surprised him about Jude. Normally she was pretty outspoken, but she always seemed to know when the situation called for quiet. Jude shifted a little and felt a sharp corner of something jab her in her jacket. She took out a case containing a CD Kyle had just downloaded for her. The disc made its way into the slot before Tommy could protest. She winked at him and he laughed. The mariachi style guitar solo started and she could see the skeptical look he gave her, even with his sunglasses on.

"Just listen. Things aren't always what you expect you know."

"Like you." He replied. She gave a small smile as she looked out the window again. The song changed and he understood what she meant then. It was different, but good. The beat drew the listener in and he found his foot pushing down a little harder on the accelerator as the trees whipped by.

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Perfection

The found a little roadside cafe and had an early lunch there. Jude realized this was kind of like their first date. That was extremely weird. The place was not busy and their empty plates were forgotten as they worked on the music to the lyrics he had written for her. The waitress half listened to them as she cleaned up around the place, amused by their humming and sudden bursts of inspiration as they worked on a melody. The young couple were really cute as they laughed and argued all in the same breath. The man looked a bit familiar to her and she wondered. He was movie star handsome, with piercing blue eyes.

"So what are we going to name this latest Jude Harrison, Tom Quincy collaboration?" He asked twirling a finger in her golden locks.

"Forever." They stared at each other until the squeal of the waitress shocked them out of their moment.

"You're Little Tommy Q! Oh my God my daughter loves you! Don't go anywhere we live just down the street. I have to call her." They watched her run behind the counter and then looked at each other again. He stood up pulling her with him. His wallet was out in a second and a few bills were placed down on the table before he dragged her out the door.

They were laughing, as the tires kicked up gravel and they pulled back onto the road. So much for normalcy.

"Did I mention I like it when you wear skirts?" She had on a blue skirt, cut just above the knee and a white blouse on. His hand found its way to her thigh.

"I ran out of clean clothes." The skirt had been one of the many items Sadie had left for her. His fingers inched their way further up her inner thigh and she bit her lip as they stroked her soft skin. The pads of his digits rubbed against her panties and she had to hold back a moan. She parted her legs giving him better access. He slipped the fabric to one side and started to caress her curls, sliding against her lips. His fingers found her sensitive nub and he pinched it gently sending a wave of desire through her, bowing her spine. His finger slid into her and she was already wet at his touch. Another finger joined the first and he started short thrusts against her willing flesh. As she neared her orgasm he stopped suddenly and her eyes opened to stare at him accusingly. He had a smirk on his face as he brought his fingers to his mouth and sucked them clean one by one. She could only stare, enraptured.

Her eyes were dark with desire as she reached for his hard arousal pushing insistently against his jeans. She placed her hand on top of him and squeezed gently. Then she unbuttoned his fly and pulled down the zipper, knuckles skimming his length through his boxers. He bit back a groan as she took him out of his shorts. Her hand fisted around him and she moved her hand up and down on his shaft in a twisting motion that she knew he liked.. He lost focus of the road for a moment and they swerved as he saw the curve coming up. She grinned at him as he gave her a half exasperated look.

"Pull over." She murmured as she leaned close and started to suck on his neck. He saw an unmarked road and took the corner a little fast as he pulled into a small wooded clearing. Tommy braked hard and shut the car off in a heartbeat. He pushed the seat back giving them room to maneuver. She swung her legs over his, straddling him as their lips met and tongues tangled. Tommy pulled back and started to unbutton her blouse, but his fingers were clumsy and he growled with frustration, finally just ripping the fabric apart causing the buttons to fly onto the floor. Jude's mouth gaped open in shock.

"Hey! I liked that blouse!" He pushed the cups of her bra down and he had his mouth on her nipples before she could protest anymore. She started to grind again his hard length, teasing herself and him mercilessly. His hands slid down to her ass and she guessed his intent and pulled back.

"Don't you dare! I'm not going bare assed in this skirt!" He laughed as she wiggled and squirmed against him pulling her panties down herself. The movement of her body rubbing against him made him groan. She positioned herself at his tip and slid down the barest centimeter, wetting his hard cock with her juices. Their mouths met again and his hips thrust up involuntarily. She pulled away from his lips.

"Condom." She whispered breathlessly and shifted off of him so he could put one on. He put his hand to the back of her head and pulled her in for another kiss as she lowered herself slowly onto his arousal. He swallowed her gasp as he filled her to the hilt. His hands went to her hips, but she pulled them away and shook her head. Her hands went to his shoulders to brace herself as she slid herself up and down, the slow pace driving them both a little crazy. Their eyes locked as she quickened her pace, feeling the burn in her thigh muscles. He grasped her ass, holding her in place and pushed up hard, starting a faster harder rhythm that left both of them gasping. She was so close, but she wanted him to cum at the same time so she tightened her inner muscles on him, making him thrust faster. He lost his rhythm as she started to convulse around him, sending him careening into an intense orgasm. She let herself fall against him and he held her wrapping his arms around her back.

As they drove back to the hotel he thought about the day they had spent together. It wasn't just the sex, although that had been a fing mazing. It was her and the song they had worked on and the laughter and hell even the silence. She smiled over at him as he squeezed her hand. If this was a glimpse of how real life would be with her, it was impossible because nothing could be that perfect. At least it never had been for Tommy Quincy.

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Nothing Lasts

Later on they found themselves in her hotel room. Tommy was intent on sweetening her up, so that he could mention the question that had been bugging him for weeks now. She had been so resistant to the idea of it, that he had to try a different tact. So his lips started at the sensitive curve of her ear, and then down to the pulse of her throat as his fingers brushed her nipples through her shirt. She let out a sigh as his teeth nipped at her soft skin. He pulled back, sensing her mood was as good as it was going to get.

"Jude come with me to Asia..." He pleaded and she tensed. She had refused to answer him the last two times he had asked her. She frowned as she moved away from him and sat up.

"Is Portia going?" He nodded reluctantly, knowing this wasn't going the way he had intended.

"What do we alternate days? Or do I get days and she gets nights? Is that how it goes?"

"It'll be just like now. This has been working." Jude thought he must have been delusional. How was this working? He was tearing her apart and Portia definitely wasn't happy.

"If I go like this I'll be what? Your pet groupie? At least I had a _reason_ to be on this tour." She wouldn't tell him now, that she could have a reason to be on the next tour if she wanted it.

"You're my girlfriend!" He said in frustration.

"Married men don't have girlfriends Tommy... just mistresses and whores." The force of the guilt that slammed through him was like an attack, making him want to lash out in return.

"You knew I was married the first time you slept with me Jude!" He wanted to take the words back so badly at the look he had just put in her eyes.

"Go back to your wife then Tommy!" She didn't say it with volume, but with the forcefulness in her voice she usually reserved for music.

"Why is it always so easy for you to let 'us' go Jude?" He asked softly.

"Maybe because there shouldn't have been an 'us' to begin with." Her words hit him like a blow and he clenched his fists, before giving her one final glare.

"Maybe you're right." He stormed out of her room, her words echoing in his head. He needed someone who accepted him as Little Tommy Q and didn't expect more than that from him. He made his way back to his own room where she greeted him in surprise.

__

His Wife

He kneaded her plump breast through the silk material and his lips found her throat as he tried to drown out the emotion he felt for another.

"Not so rough..." Portia said in a husky rasp. He froze and let go of her, standing up in one quick motion. She looked up at him in puzzlement. "I didn't mean stop..."

"I...can't...This is wrong..." Not until Jude had he ever experienced real guilt at his own actions.

"I'm your wife! How can this be wrong?!" He just shook his head and started to back away. "Tommy?" He did not know what to say.

"I need to go..."

"To her?! If your girlfriend is so in love with you. Why didn't she say yes to the Asia tour right away like Darius wanted?" He looked up at her in shock. Jude had never mentioned anything about Asia. "You ever think you're just a fling to her too?!" She picked up the bedside alarm clock and threw it at him, grazing his shoulder, but he didn't even flinch. He glared at her, any sense of guilt rushing away in a tide of anger.

"I can't handle you like this..."

"When have you ever tried?!" She continued to rant at him, but his ears tuned her out like they had countless times before, like he had with his mother when he had still lived at home. He had had enough of her. His right hand went to his left and Portia watched as he yanked off the gold band encircling his ring finger.

"I can't do this with you anymore!" He threw the ring onto the coffee table where it bounced and landed on the carpet. He turned to storm out the door not even acknowledging her final words.

"You don't get it! Nobody leaves me! Nobody makes a fool out of me!"


	24. Chapter 24

_The song in this chapter is Broken Hearted Soul by Ra. I suggest when it comes up during (And He Finally Knew) you listen to it on Youtube to get the whole effect. This is where the major drama starts. Oh and I'm posting so soon because I'm celebrating that the story was finished yesterday at 43 chapters. ENJOY!_

**Chapter 24**

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Things I'd Rather Not See

Jude turned the corner, seeing a door open and a man step out. It was the same man she had been looking for to apologize, because no matter what she still loved him. He did not notice her as his fingers were busy buttoning his shirt and she saw the crimson lipstick smeared along his jaw line. As he walked away in the other direction she took her cell phone out and dialed a number.

"Hey Darius, it's Jude. I'm good thanks."

"Yeah I thought about it. I am so grateful you gave me the opportunity to do this tour. It's been amazing."

"I have some things going on back home and I can't do it right now." She lied.

"I know I'm missing out."

"Yeah maybe Europe. Thanks again. Bye D." She hung up and walked back to her room.

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Soul Searching

Tommy walked out of the hotel needing the brisk evening air to clear his head. He had to get away from all the thoughts running around in his brain. He had never been good at confronting his own problems and he didn't know if he could start now. Portia had planted a seed of doubt into his heart. Why hadn't Jude agreed to Darius's offer right away? She wanted him just as much as he wanted her didn't she? He walked for what seemed like hours, but was really only two, before heading back to the hotel. There was only one person on his mind and he needed answers from her.

He unlocked her room's door and stepped inside, surprised by the towel clad guy coming out of the bathroom. Spied looked up at him and jumped.

"Man you scared me!" He held the towel more tightly around him.

"Where's Jude?!" She would never...would she?

"She told me she wanted to switch rooms. Something about not liking the sun in the windows." Tommy frowned and was about to ask what room Spied had when he stopped him. "Just give her a little time okay? She wouldn't talk to me, but she looked like she was in a bad place." Tommy nodded and wondered where he would go now.

"Hey you mind if I bunk on the couch?"

"Mi casa, y su casa." Spied was definitely one unique kid, but he had Jude's back and that was all that mattered to Tommy.

"Thanks."

"I'm gonna go get dressed now..." Spied said a little awkwardly before turning away.

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Parting Words

Tommy finally cornered her in the arena hospitality room, the next afternoon. Jude had ignored all his calls and had left Spied's room early that morning obviously to avoid him. She stared at him, not knowing what else to say, so he was the one who spoke first, surprising her with his question.

"Why didn't you tell me about Japan?" He asked bluntly. He thought she loved him, and this was their chance to stay together. How had he found out? She wondered.

"Because I told Darius no." He looked at her in shock. Was this it? " I can't be with you, like this... anymore Tommy." She wondered if he could see the devastation she felt, reflected in her eyes and then she wondered if he even bothered to look.

"You're breaking up with me?" No girl had ever rejected him before. "I love you Jude."

"Then pick me Tommy." His eyes showed pain, but he did not speak. "I thought so..." She shook her head in defeat. "You know exactly why I'm not going to Japan."

"I can't believe you would throw us away like this." He said angrily waving at the room with his arm. "How can you ask me to give this up? You love it just as much as I do."

"I loved being with _you._.." She said quietly.

"Would you give up your music for me?" He asked trying to make her see his point.

"Is that what I'm asking you to do Tommy?" He turned his head away at her penetrating gaze. She wasn't asking him to give up a single thing he really loved and he knew it. She wanted to give him herself, completely, but that could not happen while he was married to another. "Choose _me_. Come with me." She begged. He didn't have an answer in the face of her obvious pain. When it came down to it, his promises to her had been empty. He found in that moment he couldn't give up everything he had worked for, not even for her. Because what would he have left, without the fame and fortune? There were no guarantees that he was good enough to have a solo career, and ever more doubts started to creep in. And Jude, deep inside he had a barely acknowledged fear that eventually, she would see all of him and turn away in disgust.

"I..."

"You're a coward." She said scornfully, although inside her heart was breaking.

"You don't know anything!" He shouted at her as she started to walk away.

"You keep shaking your ass and singing music you despise Lil' Tommy Q." She turned and said before continuing her exit.

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No Goodbye

After they sang Broken for the last time on the tour, they took their bows and Tommy started to walk off the stage when he realized she hadn't followed. He turned at the edge of the stage to see the microphone still in her hand.

"Hi everyone. You guys have been so awesome. Since this is my final concert I want you to be the first to hear my new song." Jude's eyes caught Tommy's as the piano chords started. She turned back to the crowd and began to sing. His hands clenched into fists as he listened to this song she had kept from him. His eyes grew wet and he turned unable to listen anymore. They had both made their choices. He walked away as her haunting voice carried throughout the arena, piercing daggers into his heart. Maybe later they could talk again.

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Where's my will  
Can I find the way  
The earth is wild  
And I can't sit still

__

A familiar sound

A familiar voice

Makes it so hard to make a choice

I don't know if I should stay

__

A thousand stars  
You will have my word  
I'm bright enough  
To fill these cracks

__

A familiar place  
A familiar voice  
Makes it so hard to make a choice  
I don't know if I should stay

I ran to you like water

I threw my body in

And I'll stand up on the ocean

Just to show you that I am strong, strong...

But what if I am wrong

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A familiar look

A familiar smile

Makes it so hard

To make a choice

And I don't know if I should stay

away...

Jude packed up her guitar and grabbed her duffel bag from her dressing room. There were crew members that she needed to say goodbye to, and she made her rounds with the ones that weren't too busy to talk. She went to find SME next. The boys would be taking the tour bus home, but Jude had decided to fly. There was an after tour party, but none of them had opted to stay for it. She had not told Tommy and made the boys swear they wouldn't either. She and Tommy had said all there was to say that afternoon.

"Are you sorry you did this tour?" Spied asked wrapping an arm around Jude both of them knowing what he really meant.

"Of course not. We made some great music." He gave a small laugh.

"I'll call as soon as we get back." She nodded and he kissed her forehead. He had promised to bring the rest of her stuff back to her.

Kwest spotted her with Spied and made his way over having heard the news. He opened his arms and she went into them for a hug. They said their goodbyes and exchanged phone numbers. Jude had liked his laid back personality and hoped to see him again someday.

"Don't be a stranger awright?" She nodded.

"Watch out for him Kwest." She was the only other person who knew Tommy wasn't as self confident as his persona seemed.

"I will Jude. You take care." She nodded.

Jude barely made the last flight headed for Toronto. She sat alone in her row and finally let the tears fall. The flight attendant saw the sniffling girl and brought a box of tissues over handing them to a grateful Jude.

"Man problems?" The kind woman asked. Jude nodded, but did not speak, staring instead at her tear stained reflection in the glass of the window. The woman walked away, shaking her head in sympathy.

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I Can't Believe

Tommy went to his dressing room at intermission, drinking from a water bottle, wiping the sweat from his brow with a towel someone had handed him. He had been off tonight, messing up a couple of the steps and his band had noticed, not that he cared. As he walked towards the vanity table he saw the jewelry box that sat there holding a piece of paper down. He opened the box knowing what he would find. It was the necklace he had given Jude. He picked it up, the chain sliding between his fingers and he reached for the accompanying note. The first two lines were in his own handwriting. She had written another verse below his in her messy scrawl.

_Because days come and go_

_But my feelings for you are forever_

_One last kiss, before I go_

_Dry your tears_

_It is time to let you go_

No! His mind screamed. The words she had written brought the finality of their relationship straight into his soul. He grabbed his car keys from the table and pulled the door open. He looked for the nearest stage person asking if they had seen Jude. The man gave him a strange look before telling him that she had already left for the airport. No one had a chance to stop him as he tore past them, towards the back exit of the stage. His new car was parked away from everyone else's at the far end of the private lot.

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And He Finally Knew

He got into the Alfa hurriedly and shut the door, starting the car without conscious thought, his mind was so full of her. How could she not say goodbye? How could she not let him convince her to stay? The smell of sex still lingered in the air, not masked by the strong scent of new car and it hit him in the gut. He clenched the steering wheel harder trying not to relive the passion that had coursed through him, not 20 hours before. As he started down the road, he barely noticed the music on the radio playing through the custom made sound system. He glanced over to see the screen with a CD icon on it and realized Jude had left the song she had played for him yesterday, behind. It had been the most perfect day he had ever had, before reality had intruded again. He hit the play button and the mariachi style guitar solo came on. For some reason it spoke to him as he continued to speed, towards his destination. The frantic beat fit his mood perfectly as he listened to the lyrics that he had not paid much attention to the first time.

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I can't believe I'm fallin down to my knees

they got me begging you please and I still need another way

my broken chest it hurts, it won't let me breathe

I'm staring down at my wrists

you know I have to insist

that you talk to me

why won't you talk to me

Did she know somehow that this song was the one he would identify with? Did she know him that well? Why else would she have kept the Asia tour from him, guessing he would not keep his promises. He reached for his cell phone on the passenger's seat and hit redial again. Still it just rang until voice mail kicked in. He threw it back onto the leather in frustration. Jude don't leave like this.

__

when did I want to be lonely

when did I want to be cold

I can't believe that it's over

the beating of my

broken hearted soul

He would never believe it was over, not even if it came from her own lips. There was too much between them; too much to throw away. She knew it too!

__

I can't believe that I am down in this hole

always paying the toll

for having found my way to you

it doesn't matter that I pushed you away

when you wanted to stay

I have to find a way to make you

talk to me

why won't you talk to me

He tried to call her again, but again she didn't pick up. He prayed like he hadn't in years that he would make it in time as his foot pressed down even harder on the accelerator. He didn't know what he would say when he got to her. He only knew he had to see her face again.

__

when did I want to be lonely

when did I want to be cold

I can't believe that it's over

the beating of my broken hearted soul

when did I want to be lonely

when did I want to be cold

I can't believe that it's over

this feeling in my broken hearted soul

He wanted to say those words to her, to tell her he did love her. Why couldn't she see they belonged together? She couldn't leave like this. His heartbeat was frantic as he refused to accept that it was over. His stomach felt hollow like he had lost something vital to his existence. She couldn't really mean it. She loved him too and he couldn't believe he had ever doubted that for the barest minute.

__

don't you dare walk away

this cannot be the end

you're my savior, you're my lover, my muse, my best friend

I won't smile again

I won't ever be loved

you can' t do this to me

if you can hear what I'm saying

please talk to me

you never talk to me

His thoughts were muddled, only images of her coming through. The red head who had blown him off the first time they had met. The girl who had sang Broken with him, pouring emotion into every note. Her sleeping figure curled against him. One again he reached for his cell and dialed, pressing the phone to his ear. Dammit Jude answer! When he looked up the winding of the road was only 20 feet away. He slipped off the accelerator, but the car barely slowed as his foot hit the brake hard.

__

when did I want to be lonely

When did I want to be cold

I can't believe that it's over

The beating of my

broken hearted soul

There was no squeal of tires as the sleek car met the sharp curve of the road too fast. Then there was only darkness as oblivion came to greet him head on.

__

I can't believe that it's over

this feeling in my

broken hearted soul

_Dry your tears_

_It is time to let you go_

**A/N: Everyone seems to forget that Portia never meant to kill Angie. Angie just happened to be the one to take Tommy's car.**


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

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Emergency

Portia, Kwest and the Boyz Attack members were all camped out at the hospital where Tommy had been brought. The Boyz had gone downstairs to get some food when Darius came rushing in having been called when Tommy had abruptly left the concert. He saw his sister sitting crumpled in a chair with Kwest beside her. As Kwest saw him he stood up to let Darius have the seat, leaving them alone. Portia looked up at Darius and as he took her in his arms she burst into uncontrollable sobs.

"It's all my fault! What if he dies?! I love him so much!"

"Shh...Portia he's going to be okay..." He didn't really know that, but he had to reassure her. "It's not your fault." Her eyes looked up at him, clearer than they had been just a moment ago.

"Dar I did something real bad." And then she told him the truth. He sat back staggered for a long moment as he stared into her brown eyes, not knowing this stranger in front of him. He took control of himself and his efficient mind started to plot.

"I'll take care of it."

When his sister had calmed down some, at least for the moment, Darius walked off to make a call. At best it would be attempted murder, at worst murder in the first. He could not let anything happen to his baby sister. He had promised their mother he would always watch out for her.

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It Just Gets Worse

It was almost 7 in the morning when Jude made it home from the airport. She hadn't slept at all on the plane and her eyes were swollen and gritty from crying. As she let herself in she heard the television on in the living room and dropped her things by the door to go investigate. It was early for anyone to be up. Sadie sat on the couch riveted to the screen. There was a breaking news story about to be announced again as it had been many times over the late night/ early morning.

"Sadie?" Her sister looked up at her with horror written all over her face.

"Jude sit down." The news reporter came on then.

_We are live at the scene of the accident where Boy Attack front man Tommy Quincy smashed his sports car into a telephone pole, last night. Police say speed may have been a factor. He was flown straight to St. Michaels Hospital where his condition is reported to be critical. There are no further details at this time. We will keep you updated as facts become available._

They showed a picture of the crumpled red sports car, smashed beyond recognition; the car Jude had been in just yesterday. Jude ran from the room and grabbed the kitchen phone, pulling the number Kwest had given her just last night, from her pocket. She dialed his cell phone praying he had it on.

"Yeah?" He answered sounding agitated. Sadie walked in having followed her, but she did not notice all her attention was focused on one thing.

"Kwest!"

"Jude..." His voice softened.

"Is he...?" She couldn't ask the question.

"He's alive...But he hasn't woken up yet. He hit his head hard and they're worried about hemorrhaging in the brain."

The phone fell from her hands as she slid to the floor gasping and crying. Sadie sat beside her wrapping her arms around her. Sadie took the phone off the floor and spoke to Kwest for a few minutes. She told him she would have Jude on the next available flight that day. Sadie drew Jude a bath and left her before looking for flights.

__

Awareness

Tommy became aware in slow degrees, pain lanced through his body, but he felt strangely content at the hand holding onto his. She was there and that was all that mattered. He opened his eyes slowly, expecting to see her familiar blond tresses lying against his side, but instead the hair was thicker and much darker in color, belonging to a different but just as familiar person. Where was he? His eyes scanned the hospital room for any sign of the one he needed to see, but there was no one else in the small space.

"Hey." He croaked. Her head jerked up at the sound in the room, quiet except for the beeping machines. Tears filled her eyes as relief added to the ever present guilt.

"What happened?" He obviously knew he was hurt, but the reason why eluded him. It was only Jude dominating his thoughts. Where was she?

"Tommy you were in an accident...Do you remember?" For a moment he couldn't think clearly, his head hurt so much.

"The Alfa?" She nodded. And he remembered all of it in flash. Jude had left and he had gone after her. The song and then the curve of the road, ran through his thoughts. Portia started to cry and he held the back of her head with his good hand, the other one was in a sling strapped to his side. He comforted her, even though he was hurting too.

"Hey...It's okay..." Portia finally got herself under control.

"It was destroyed." She whispered and he could have died. She stood up then. "I'll get the doctor. He'll want to know you're awake." She couldn't meet his eyes.

Many people had wanted to come see him when they had heard he was awake, but the only one he allowed was Kwest. When Kwest entered the room, he took one look at Tommy and winced.

"That bad?" Tommy had a large white bandage on his forehead and scratches and bruises all over. His arm was in a sling and more bandages were wrapped around his chest to protect his broken ribs.

"Good news you might have scared all the groupies off for good." Tommy gave a small laugh that sent him reeling as pain stabbed through his chest.

"Man don't do that." Kwest winced again.

"Sorry..."

"Do me a favor. Look for my pants?" Kwest walked over to the closet and searched until he found a small bag of personal items. He figured Tommy's clothes had probably been ruined at the crash or after in the emergency room.

"There's just this." He held up the bag and Tommy raised his arm for it. He took out the item he had been looking for and breathed a sigh of relief. Kwest looked on, but did not comment. A white gold chain dangled from between Tommy's fingers and he watched as he started to fall asleep. Portia came in and he nodded at her before leaving.

__

Relief and Instant Pain

Jude and Sadie were waiting to board the flight back to Vancouver when Jude called Kwest one last time. They would have to shut off their cell phones on the plane so this was her last chance to get an update. Noon was the earliest Sadie had been able to get tickets for and although she had told Jude to get some sleep, her sister had sat on the couch catatonic until the taxi had arrived to take them to the airport. Jude had not slept for over 29 hours. Sadie watched as Jude put the phone to her ear, praying there would not be bad news at the other end of the line.

"Jude he just woke up." Kwest said recognizing the caller number right away this time. She let out the breath she had been holding since early this morning. "He's pretty banged up, but the doctor says he'll be fine. When is your flight arriving? I'll come get you." She did not answer him. Now that the fear was ebbing away, the ever present pain took its place.

"Jude?" At her continued silence, understanding dawned on Kwest. "You're not coming..."

"No..." She couldn't see him and be able to let go again. She was barely functioning right now.

"Do you have anything you want me to tell Tommy?" He didn't want her, she tried to tell herself.

"Don't tell him anything Kwest. I...I'm glad he's okay...Do me a favor?" She said a little shakily.

"What do you need?"

"Don't tell him I called okay?"

"Jude are you sure?" Kwest asked with concern in his voice.

"Yes...Thanks Kwest." Sadie could see Jude was barely holding on as she hugged her.

"He just woke up..." Sadie nodded. "They said he would be okay..."

"Come on. Let's get you home then."

__

Home

It was almost 2 PM by the time they got back to their house. Jude had not said a single thing on the ride back and Sadie looked at her worriedly. They were greeted by Jamie who had left his house as soon as he had seen the taxi pull up. He had been looking out the window all day, knowing Jude was supposed to be back today.

"Can I get your autograph?" He asked in a forced nonchalant voice, although inside he was so excited to finally see her again. It had been a long few months without her. She was his best friend and after missing her for so long, he had realized, much more. She looked up at him with tired red rimmed eyes and threw herself into his arms.

"Jamie..."

He caught her automatically and looked over her head at Sadie in question. He held her awkwardly, her arms were so tight around him. Sadie mouthed the word 'later' and walked up taking Jude from him. She led her sister into the house with Jamie trailing behind them. Sadie sat Jude down on the couch and put a throw blanket on her. Jude tucked her knees up to her chest and stared into space as Sadie brought Jamie into the kitchen.

"What's going on Sadie?" Jamie asked confusion and worry warring in his voice. Sadie sighed, pondering what she could tell him.

"She met someone on the road Jamie...It...didn't end well." Jamie frowned, while jealousy hit him. She had not said a word all of the times he had called her. Then he realized he had been the one doing most of the calling. "Jamie...She needs friends right now...Don't ask her anything, unless she volunteers it." He nodded. "I need to go to the store. Watch her for me?" She knew Jude would need all the comfort she could get and first on that list was ice cream.

"Sure." Jamie wandered back into the living room as Sadie left. He sat down beside Jude and she put her head on his shoulder. Jude was uncharacteristically silent and he wondered again what had happened. Jude wanted to be numb in the worst possible way, but the pain would not go away. Jamie for the first time since they had met, could not understand, that she physically could not force herself to speak. There was only one word that wanted to escape from her lips, his name.


	26. Chapter 26

_The song in this is I Don't Care by Apocalyptica and I Still Love you by you know who. As always reviews are welcome._

**Chapter 26**

_Homecoming_

Jamie let himself into Jude's house the next morning with two covered plates in his hands. He found her in the kitchen, with an untouched cup of coffee in front of her. She looked up at the sound of his approach and gave him a half hearted smile. He placed a plate in front of her and uncovered it to reveal J shaped pancakes he had convinced his Nana to make for her.

"Nana said you needed a welcome home."

"Tell her I said thanks...but I'm not hungry..." She had been living on nothing but coffee for the last 2 days.

"If you don't eat, you'll hurt her feelings." He cajoled. She nodded hesitantly and broke a small piece off to nibble on. Jamie was worried about her. He had seen her go through breakups before and she had never been like this. He sat with her all morning, but she said few words, instead asking him about the radio station where they had hired him full time.

Later that morning the phone rang and Jude immediately grabbed it, surprising Jamie.

"Hello?" Jude was always afraid it would be Kwest with bad news. She had felt compelled to sneak in a phone call to him this morning, needing to know Tommy was still okay.

"Hey...We just pulled into G-Major...You want me to come by?"

"Yes. I need you..."

"We heard on the radio...I'll be there soon." He hung up and Jude felt a little better they were back. No matter how wonderful Jamie had been yesterday and this morning, there was no way he could understand. And there was absolutely no way she could explain it to him. It hurt too much.

As soon as Jude opened the door she fell into Spied's arms. He could give her something Jamie could not and she broke down again, crying into his shoulder. Spied had been there. Jamie looked on as jealousy ate him up. It couldn't possibly have been Spied she had been with could it? That made no sense. She had started to calm down when Spied realized Jamie was still staring at them.

"Why is Jamie glaring at me?" Spied asked close to Jude's ear a little confused. Jude looked over to see Jamie look away quickly.

"I dunno...I didn't tell him anything...about you know... Sadie told him I was with someone and it didn't end well. Tell Kyle and Wally no detes either 'k?" Spied nodded. He could understand why Jude wouldn't want to share her experiences with anyone, not even Jamie. She had essentially had an affair with a married man. No matter the motivation, it wasn't something to be proud of and it could not be explained to Jamie in a way that showed Jude and Tommy's true relationship. One of Jamie's flaws was how he viewed the world in black and white; there were no shades of gray for him. It was like how he had been the only dissenting vote about Jude going on the tour with Boyz Attack. He had accused her of selling out. He simply wouldn't understand, so no one would tell him.

__

The Real World Calls

Jude had been licking her wounds for 5 days now and Sadie came in to see her sister, staring blankly at the T.V. Sadie knew she had needed time to heal and had put Georgia off as long as possible, but it was time for her sister to remember her other love.

"Jude..." She looked up in surprise, not realizing Sadie was there. "You have to get dressed. Georgia said you have to come in today." Jude nodded, knowing it was coming. She had stayed up all last night to write a new song and found she wanted to record it too. No matter how many goodbyes she said to Tommy, there was always a kernel of hope that wanted to grow, because she loved him. No matter what, she had accepted she didn't want to get over him.

Jude sat in Georgia's office listening to her speak. It felt good to be back in this building and she felt normalcy return, at least a little.

"So how was it?" Georgia asked with a smile on her face, masking the concern she felt for the girl. Jude looked like she had lost weight, and hadn't been sleeping properly. She should have been bouncing off the walls having come back from such a huge experience.

"It was good...I learned a lot."

"I'm proud of you, you know?" Jude looked up at her in surprise. "Your album went Platinum." Jude mustered up a true smile.

"Seriously?!" Georgia nodded.

"Seriously. So are you ready to start your next success Super Star? We have some studio time set up tomorrow morning." Jude gave her a serious look as she prepared herself to just jump in.

"Do you have anything open now? I have a song I want to do." Georgia was a little taken aback, but nodded.

"Head over to Studio B and tell Roger what you need." Jude got up and walked out of her office. Georgia wondered what had happened on tour. She got a few answers when Jude came out of Studio B 4 hours later and she heard her first single for her sophomore album.

Jude stood in the sound booth and sang her heart out, because this was what was in her heart and she knew always would be. She wished she could have said those words to him. She wished not for the first time it could have been that easy. But nothing about them had ever been easy. She closed her eyes and let her first love fill her, taking away only the briefest hurt.

_If we walk away now  
There's no turning around  
Gotta say what I mean  
While you're here with me  
I'm not sure I'll find words  
To cover the hurt  
That I see in your eyes  
But I gotta try_

_I know rocks turn to sand  
And hearts can change hands  
And you're not to blame  
When the sky fills with rain  
But if we stay or walk away  
There's one thing that's true  
I still love you  
I still love you_

_Can you search down inside  
Let go of your pride?  
If I forget trying to win  
And just let you in  
I didn't travel this far  
To watch it all fall apart  
So give me your hand  
And take a chance_

_I know rocks turn to sand  
And hearts can change hands  
And you're not to blame  
When the sky fills with rain  
But if we stay or walk away  
There's one thing that's true  
I still love you_

_Riding with me as close as before  
Whatever happens, I won't ask for more  
Here in my heart from now 'til the end  
Flame out or fly, we have to try again_

_I still_

_I know rocks turn to sand  
And hearts can change hands  
And you're not to blame  
When the sky fills with rain  
But if we stay or walk away  
There's one thing that's true  
I still love you  
Yeah, I still love you_

_If we stay or walk away  
There's one thing that's true  
I still love you  
I still love you_

When E.J. And Georgia heard the song they were floored. It was so much softer than her previous work and filled with so much emotion. Georgia wasn't sure what to say as she looked at the girl who could not meet her eyes. Luckily E.J. Saved the day with one of her outrageous questions.

"It isn't about Chaz Blackburn is it?!" Georgia gave her a look and Jude simply looked amused. "What? We all saw the tabloids Jude." E.J. Said defensively. Jude shook her head a small smile on her lips.

"No. Chaz and I are just friends."

"Too bad...The publicity would have been great." E.J. Said dejected. "Are you sure you...?" Jude laughed and shook her head.

"Yes I'm sure."

"Everyone will be wondering who it's about."

"Let them..." Jude said with a maturity that surprised Georgia all over again. Gone was the girl who had been uncomfortable around the media. In her place was someone who would not care what people said.

"Good job Jude." Jude nodded and got out of the chair.

"Thanks. What time tomorrow?"

"10." She nodded and left.

_Anger_

Tommy had been in the hospital for twelve days now and he was scheduled to go home in two. Twelve days and not one phone call, not one acknowledgment that he had almost died. He had expected her to show up the next day and she hadn't. Then he had convinced himself she would be there the day after that, and then the day after that. Her face haunted his dreams every night. But Jude had forgotten him as soon as she had stepped out of that stadium. She didn't care and he found himself slightly numb from the hurt and anger it caused. He had not been the only liar in their relationship. If she had loved him, it couldn't have died this quickly. He reached for some paper and a pen with his good arm and started to write.

_I try to make it through my life_

_In my way_

_There's you_

_I try to make it through these lies_

_And that's all I do_

_Just don't deny it_

_Don't try to fight this_

_And deal with it_

_And that's just part of it_

_If you were dead or still alive_

_I don't care I don't care_

_Just go and leave this all behind_

_'Cuz I swear (I swear)_

_I don't care_

_I try to make you see my side_

_I always try to stay in line_

_But your eyes see right through_

_That's all they do_

_I'm getting buried in this place_

_I got no room, you're in my face_

_Don't say anything_

_Just go away_

_If you were dead or still alive_

_I don't care I don't care_

_Just go and leave this all behind_

_'Cuz I swear (I swear)_

_I don't care_

_I'm not changing everything_

_Cuz you won't be there for me_

_I'm not changing everything_

_Cuz you won't be there for me_

_If you were dead or still alive_

_I don't care I don't care_

_Just go and leave this all behind_

_'Cuz I swear (I swear)_

_I don't care_

_If you were dead or still alive_

_I don't care (I don't care)_

_I don't care (I don't care)_

_Just go and leave this all behind_

_I don't care (I swear)_

_I don't care...at all_

He tweaked the lyrics until he was satisfied. He had known exactly what to say to her. He sat back in the bed, proud of the song he had written. But it wasn't true, at least not yet, if ever. He couldn't stop caring and that was what hurt the most.

_Different Girl_

Jude was sitting with her knees drawn up facing Jamie on the couch when Sadie walked into the room. Sadie noticed black curls on Jude's back where her short concert tee had ridden up. Sadie reached over and pulled it up higher revealing Jude's tattoo before Jude could stop her.

"Hmm...sexy Jude." For just a moment Jude forgot.

"You should see it on his arm..." Sadie raised an eyebrow and pictured it. Bad boy with the tattoo. Matching tattoos...Jude's face got somber again as she realized what she had said. Sadie would probably never see him again, anymore than Jude would. Sadie turned to Jamie to diffuse the situation.

"Do you think it's sexy Jamie?" Jude turned so Jamie could see it more clearly. His mouth hung open and all he could utter was one syllable.

"Uh..." The sisters looked at each other and burst out laughing. At the time Jamie had thought it was damn hot, but later as he recalled the conversation he was upset by the implications. Jude had gotten a matching tattoo with the guy, no one would name, she had been seeing on tour. It had been that serious.

"What does it mean? It seems kind of random for you." Jude took Sadie's hand and folded her fingers until only the index was left out. She traced the start of the letter T and then the J. Jude looked at her sister, to see if she saw it now. Sadie's eyes widened.

"Oh..." Jamie's view had been blocked by Sadie's arm and he frowned, yet again kept out of the loop. He didn't understand the big secret about Jude's brief relationship and she wouldn't talk, no one would, not even Kyle or Wally when he had tried to grill them.


	27. Chapter 27

_**A/N: I'd like to say thank you to all the people who have taken the time to review this story. I normally hate when people start whining that they aren't getting enough reviews and are going to hold the story hostage. Honestly though, even I have thought about simply quitting posting on this website because the lack of feedback for a story I have worked hard on is very discouraging. I will however finish posting my story on here because those of you that have taken the time to tell me you like it deserve that.**_

_The song used is Forever by Papa Roach_

**Chapter 27**

__

Welcome To The Show

The Boyz Attack Asia tour, that had been postponed due to Tommy's accident, started 2 and 1/2 months later. When Tommy had left the hospital, Portia had been the one to take care of him and he had let her. As soon as he had finished the medication the doctor had given him, he started drinking. Portia was living in her own hell, but thought she deserved it. She tried to make him happy every way she knew how and at least their fighting had stopped, but Tommy's drinking only got worse. He wasn't angry with her anymore and she didn't know if it was a good sign, because he treated her with a tolerant indifferent affection instead. She went to Japan with him, hoping the change of scenery would cheer him up. He had always liked performing.

__

Postcard

Fan mail arrived at G-Major for Jude with amazing frequency now and E.J. usually took care of most of it, so when she handed Jude a postcard, Jude was surprised.

"I thought you said you were just friends with a certain boybander..." E.J. Said a little slyly. Jude's hand was a little shaky as she looked at the picture of Japanese cherry blossoms. She turned it quickly and read the brief words.

__

Wish you were here beautiful.

Missing your smile.

-Chaz

Jude had to laugh, although it wasn't funny. Of course it was Chaz, who else would it be. She found herself wondering as she always did, if_ he _still thought of her.

__

Little Tommy

Jude and Jamie had been ready to see a movie one afternoon when Sadie decided to invite herself. The two girls outvoted Jamie and he wondered how he had wound up being one of the only men in a theater full of women. Okay so maybe he had watched an episode or two on T.V., but it only been for the sex scenes. He groaned as Sex and the City started. Jamie closed his eyes as an outdoor shower scene involving Samantha's neighbor started. He wanted to run away at this point.

"Ripped and well hung. I think I'm in love." Sadie said, eying the screen appreciatively.

"You think he's big?" Sadie thought Jude was kidding, but when she looked at her Jude looked curious.

"You don't?" Jude shrugged, having only had one guy to compare him to and Sadie eyes widened.

"Oh my god! You mean..." Sadie's mouth hung open. "You were a virgin!" She said a little too loudly, making everyone around either 'Shhhh!' them or listen more intently.

"A little louder Sadie. I don't think people in the next theater heard." Jude hissed.

'Sorry' Sadie mouthed. Jamie sunk lower in his chair, embarrassment warring with jealousy. His question of how involved Jude had gotten with the guy on tour was answered and he wasn't happy about it. Sadie managed to stay quiet through the rest of the movie, but as soon as they were in the lobby she had more questions for her sister.

"My first time hurt and he was smaller than that movie guy...You must have been crying." Sadie totally ignored Jamie walking beside them. He had been a fixture in their lives for such a longtime. Jude shook her head, remembering that night, how gentle he had been.

"Sadie Jamie's here..." Sadie rolled her eyes.

"Oh come on like he never did it with Patsy." Not that Jamie had been remotely Patsy's first.

"If I tell you will you at least shut up until we get home?" Sadie nodded. "It hurt for like a second okay? I was a little sore afterwards, but that was it...He was so... slow..."

"Slow...?" Sadie raised an eyebrow making the innuendo out of the word that it deserved. "Did you...you know...?" Jude groaned. Sadie had been trying to get details out of Jude forever, but Jude had stayed quiet until now.

"Yes! Now shut up Sadie." Jamie trailed behind them, wanting to sink into the floor.

__

Wrong Woman

Two weeks and it had been pure misery for Portia. Tommy was a mess when he wasn't performing, staying out late and doing God knows what with the groupies.

"Tommy what is wrong with you? You _chose_ to stay with me. Why are you drinking all the time?" He laughed at her scornfully.

"I didn't choose _you_ Portia. I took the easy road. I stayed for the money and fame. Your brother would have buried me alive if I had left with Jude." His eyes locked on hers as he tried to push her away once and for all. The only time he touched her now was when he was drunk.

"So who is it this time Tommy?" For him there was always a girl involved.

"It's always her Portia." Tommy said, so tired of this game they played.

"Why do you always do this to me Tommy?" She said broken now, as drops fell onto her clasped hands.

"Why do you always let me Portia?" His gaze stared at her tear filled ones. "Why do you insist on hanging onto someone who loves someone else?" She shook her head, unwilling to believe his words.

"You don't mean that..." She said in a small voice.

"Do you remember our wedding Portia?"

"Of course I do...Why are you asking me that?"

"Because I don't! That's how much it meant to me." He sighed. "Look Portia even before I met Jude I was never faithful to you. You're a good person and you deserve better than that..." Tommy was wrong on at least one point; she wasn't a good person. Guilt woke her up at night, but she had promised Darius she would never tell anyone what had really happened to Tommy's car.

Jude had called him a coward that last day and she had been right. He had been afraid to change his own life, not knowing if he could be more than just a player in a boy band. Instead of choosing what he really wanted, he had let the only person who got him, the only one he had ever loved, go. He asked for a divorce that night, unable to pretend for Portia or for Darius any longer. Portia flew back to Canada as soon as she was able to, finally accepting that there was nothing left between them to fight for.

__

Loneliness

Lin gripped the headboard bars as he shoved hard inside of her. His eyes looked through her, lost in some other place, as he moved above her. It was a good thing she liked it a little rough. Her lower muscles tightened in pleasure, wringing a cry out of her. He thrust against her a few more times before finding his own release. He rolled away, onto his back, his arm flung over his head.

"Are you always this vigorous?" She asked leaning on an elbow to look over at him. His haunted blue eyes met hers.

"Sorry..."

"Oh no worries darling. I _like_ 'forceful'." She said in her lilting British accent. She was an international model visiting home in Hong Kong, that he had met at an industry party that night. She leaned over and reached for the CD on the nightstand. She inhaled two lines of white powder on it, before offering it to Tommy. He shook his head and watched her. She was a lovely girl, slender, tall and sleek with exotic almond eyes and silky long black hair. Yet he found he felt nothing as he admired her lithe body.

"So who is she?" She asked, startling him out of his thoughts. She was perceptive, he would give her that.

"What makes you think it isn't my wife?" She shook her head with a hard smile.

"You wouldn't be here fucking me if it was your wife..." He did not feel the need to answer her. She was just a stranger after all. "Lucky girl. The one who has your heart. Whoever she is." She said gazing down at his endowments. Her gaze made him feel slightly dirty. She slid her body down and took him in her mouth. His hands fisted in her hair as she worked her lips on him.

He felt hollow inside as she left his hotel room. None of the women he had lost himself in could replace _her_. He pulled out a crumpled piece of paper from his travel bag and lay it down next to the blank hotel stationary. He was finally ready to put lyrics to their song.

__

In the brightest hour of my darkest day  
I realized what is wrong with me  
Can't get over you  
Can't get through to you  
It's been a Helter Skelter romance from the start

Take these memories that are haunting me  
Of a paper man cut into shreds  
By his own pair of scissors  
He'll never forgive her  
He'll never forgive her

Because days come and go  
But my feelings for you are forever  
Because days come and go  
But my feelings for you are forever

Sitting by a fire  
On a lonely night  
Hanging over from another good time  
With another girl  
Little dirty girl  
You should listen to this story of a life  
You're my heroine  
In this moment I'm lonely  
Fulfilling my darkest dreams  
All these drugs all these women  
I'm never forgiving this broken heart of mine

Because days come and go  
But my feelings for you are forever  
Because days come and go  
But my feelings for you are forever

One last kiss before I go  
Dry your tears  
It is time to let you go  
One last kiss  
Before I go  
Dry your tears  
It is time to let you go

Because days come and go  
But my feelings for you are forever  
Because days come and go  
But my feelings for you are forever

One last kiss  
Before I go  
Dry your tears  
It is time to let you go  
One last kiss  
Before I go  
Dry your tears  
It is time to let you go  
One last kiss

Dawn had crested the skyscrapers, when he was finished. He wasn't done thinking about Jude yet and he wasn't sure he ever would be. She had left him empty and he didn't know how to reclaim what was his. He didn't know if he wanted to.


	28. Chapter 28

_The song in this chapter is Shame by Stabbing Westward_

Chapter 28

__

It All Comes Out

The tour was almost over when Kwest found Tommy at the hotel bar late one night. He had been meaning to check on him, but was usually busy with his own work or he was unable to find Tommy. Tommy sat on the high back stool and stared at the bottles lining the wall, barely acknowledging his friend. Kwest sat down beside him and ordered a beer.

"What's wrong with you man?" Kwest had noticed the women, the drinking and the rumors of harder stuff Tommy had gotten into.

"How do you forget?" Tommy swirled the amber liquid around in his glass, before taking a healthy swallow. Kwest figured he was talking about the accident, until Tommy spoke his next words.

"I miss her." Kwest knew immediately who Tommy was talking about and it wasn't his soon to be ex-wife.

"If you miss her why don't you talk to her?"

"Kwest it's been months. She forgot me the minute the tour was over. She didn't even call me when I was in the hospital." Kwest could not believe Tommy would really think that. Jude had been crying so hard, when she had heard about the accident Sadie had had to take the phone. Of course Tommy didn't know that...Some promises were made to be broken.

"T. there's something I need to tell you." Tommy gave him a bleak look. "When you had your accident, Jude called me as soon as she found out. She went right back to the airport ready to take the next flight out..."

"Then why didn't she?"

"She called me before the flight. That's when you woke up...Once she knew you'd be okay...She called me every day until you were out of the hospital man." Tommy sucked in his breath imagining what would have happened if she had come back. Would he still be here? Or would he have had the courage to finally do what he really wanted?

"Why didn't you tell me this before?"

"She asked me not to. You were still with Portia T. Besides I thought you would have figured it out. Didn't you heard that single she released?" Tommy shook his head. I Still Love you had been released before they had left for this tour. Kwest frowned. Tommy should have heard it.

"I can't listen to her voice..." Kwest shook his head in disbelief.

"You two really are meant for each other, both stubborn asses." Tommy looked at his friend wondering why he was attacking him all of a sudden. "T. the title of the song is I Still Love You." Tommy asked if Kwest had a copy and quickly followed Kwest to his room to take his I-Pod.

__

Acceptance

Tommy sank onto the sofa ins his hotel room, before he let himself listen. His eyes closed as he hit repeat and let her voice melt away the pain he had been carrying for so long. He finally accepted that she loved him, no matter what, flaws and all. He knew then that she wouldn't stop loving him. Later as his emotions calmed a little he knew he had to respond to her song. As always she was his best inspiration, when his hand found the pen and he started to write. He sat in his hotel room and let himself feel everything he had denied for so long. He felt the guilt and longing that had become a part of him and was ready to let it all free. Everything became more real, more alive as he thought of her now.

The song he came up was simple and to the point. Tommy hoped someday she would hear it.

__

I only see myself reflected in your eyes  
So all that I believe I am essentially are lies  
And everything I've hoped to be or ever thought I was  
Died with your belief in me so who that hell am I?

I don't know if I am real without  
What is left of me without you  
I don't know what's real without you  
How can I exist without you

I'm wandering 'round confused  
Wondering why I try  
The more that you deny my pain  
The more it intensifies...

I pray for someone to ache for me the way I ache for you...  
If you ignore that I'm alive  
I've nothing to cling to

I don't know if I am real without you  
What is left of me without you  
I don't know what's real without you  
How can I exist without you

I stare into this mirror  
So tired of this life  
If only you would speak to me or cared if I'm alive

Once I swore I would die for you  
I never meant like this  
No I never meant like this  
No I never meant like this

_I don't know if I'm real without you  
What is left of me without you  
I don't know what's real without you_

_How can I exist without you  
How can I exist without you  
How can I exist without you_

She's Not For You

Spied watched Jamie's face as he watched Jude do her interview. Jude had invited them along, having planned on hanging with them afterwards. The look of longing and hope gave him away. He was in love with Jude, again. Spied found himself trying to head Jamie off, even though he knew it was probably a lost cause.

"Don't do this Jamie." Spied said, causing his friend to look at him in puzzlement.

"Do what?"

"Don't fall for her again. She's not the same girl you used to know." After Tommy, Jude would never be content with any relationship Jamie could offer. She needed someone who had the kind of intensity she possessed.

"What you want her for yourself?" Jamie asked scornfully, jealousy coloring his words because he couldn't help but see how close Spied and Jude had become after the tour.

"It's not like that Jamie. She can't give you what you want." Jamie frowned as he watched her flirt with the interviewer.

She was different he had noticed, and it wasn't the hair because she had been blond way before she became a redhead. It was like some infinitesimal part of her personality had come upon an immovable object and had bent to fit it. The fan boys and men that looked upon her as a sexual object phased her not in the least, and some of them had even been amazingly good looking. It was as if she was more comfortable in her own skin, accepting her sexuality and using it when it suited her purposes, although never on him. She could flirt shamelessly without batting an eyelash, with any number of men, whereas before she had no awareness of how guys saw her. Now she seemed to know and didn't seem to care. What had happened to Jude on tour? What man could possibly have left such a deep imprint on her psyche in such a brief period of time?

__

We're Done

The tour was over and last night Tommy had told his band they were over too. There had been questions and threats, but he let them slide off his back. He wasn't worried about losing the fame anymore, because he didn't think anything could be worse than losing her. As they sat around the V.I.P. Lounge of the airport, he far away from Boyz Attack, he felt lighter somehow. He was glad to be going home. As soon as he got there he would ask the band publicist to release a statement of his separation from Portia. He had to get things right this time.

As Tommy sat in his plush seat in first class, flying home from Thailand, he looked out the into the inky darkness of night. He should have been ecstatic, should have felt unburdened because now he was sure she had cared, had loved him. He had the freedom to find her again, without doubts weighing him down. But her words continued to haunt him. _Married men don't have girlfriends Tommy... just mistresses and whores. _He remembered the pain in her voice and in her eyes and it still twisted his guts into knots. This would be the hardest thing he had ever done in his life, but she deserved all of him and until he could offer that he would not risk hurting her again.

__

Lunch and the Former Boy Bander

Jude was singing in the sound booth when she felt someone watching her. Her eyes widened in surprise as she stared at the man she had not seen in almost half a year. He had the same cocky attitude as he grinned at her and motioned her to come out. She took her headphones off and greeted him in the hallway. The interns looked on with interest, of course they all knew who he was.

"What evil wind brings you into town?" She teased. He shook his head.

"Same old Jude. You look good." He said as he took in her tight red tank top and tight jeans with a familiar glint in his eye. Jude rolled her eyes in response.

"Same old Chaz." They both smiled.

"So I thought I could take you out for lunch." She thought about it for a moment and nodded. There was no reason they couldn't hang out anymore.

He took her to a nice restaurant that she felt under dressed in, but the staff was all effusive smiles and warm welcomes. She still could not get used to his level of fame. Sure she had some of her own, but it wasn't nearly like this.

"You never answered my question. What brings you to town?"

"You..." She placed the glass of water she had been about to sip from back on the table.

"What?"

"Relax I had some free time, so I've been kicking around Canada." She looked at him in puzzlement.

"Tommy wanted a break from the band." None of the members of Boyz Attack had been convinced that Tommy had really quit. He would come back soon enough and in the mean time they all had the vacation they had needed. Jude froze in shock. He had left Boyz Attack. But why now? She turned her eyes back on Chaz trying to catch the thread of his conversation.

"You didn't hear a single thing I just said did you?" Jude looked a little embarrassed as she shook her head. "I asked if you were seeing anyone." She sighed and thought 'here we go again.'

"No...But..." Chaz looked at her and shook his head.

"But you're not ready to start dating again?" He had never had this particular sentence directed at him before, but he could guess just from the look in her big blue eyes.

"I have a lot of stuff going on right now." He nodded accepting her words. The truth was if it had been important enough to her, nothing would have stood in her way of doing what she wanted. She was simply a lost cause, but he had had to try one last time. He delivered her back to G-Major with smiles and laughter. They had had a good time together and Jude found she liked him, even if he was a player, he was honest about it.


	29. Chapter 29

_The song in this chapter is Like The Way I Do by Melissa Etheridge. The game they play is only included because my readers wanted it in there. It is pretty funny though._

**Chapter 29**

__

Promises To Keep

When Tommy returned to Vancouver he was immediately forced back into the studio. Darius was livid when he heard Tommy had quit Boyz Attack and he said in no uncertain terms that he would not let Tommy out of his contract. It was exactly what Jude had predicted would happen. Tommy started working on his supposed solo album, getting Kwest a job as engineer, to help him out. The hours in the studio weren't wasted because he learned everything about producing that he could. He had hoped that maybe Jude would have contacted him after the Boyz Attack separation was made public, but she never did. He didn't blame her though; he was still married after all. He lost himself in the studio, unable to work on his real music, but getting experience working with the equipment. He would stop himself every time his fingers itched to dial her number. He had promises to keep before he would let himself disrupt her life again.

_He Moved On_

Jude went out to get the mail and started thumbing through it as she made her way back into the living room. She saw the tabloid and rolled her eyes. Sadie had some strange obsession with Talk National even though it usually full of nothing but malicious gossip and rumors. As she sat down her breath froze as she saw the picture on the cover. Tommy with Cassandra Hayward, a beautiful, polished up and coming actress looking all cozy, their cheeks touching as she appeared to be whispering into his ear. She scanned the article quickly and there was speculation about whether or not Cassandra was the reason for Tommy's separation from Portia. Jude would not let the hurt take over again, instead she let anger find its place. He had finally found someone who he had thought was worth leaving Portia for. Bastard! She picked up her journal and guitar and got to work, channeling her emotions into music.

Jude was strumming on her guitar a few hours later when Spied walked into her living room. She had finished the song and felt cleansed. She knew deep down Tommy would one day regret letting her go.

"Hey I just wrote this. Tell me what you think." He sat down on the matching chair opposite her on the couch as she began.

_Is it so hard to satisfy your senses  
You found out to love me you have to climb some fences  
Scratching and crawling along the floor to touch you  
And just when it feels right you say you found someone to hold you  
Does she like I do_

_Baby tell me does she love you like the way I love you  
Does she stimulate you attract and captivate you  
Tell me does she miss you existing just to kiss you  
Like the way I do_

_Tell me does she want you infatuate and haunt you  
Does she know just how to shock you electrify and rock you  
Does she inject you seduce you and affect you  
Like the way I do_

_Can I survive all the implications  
Even if I tried could you be less than an addiction  
Don't you think I know there's so many others  
Who would beg steal and lie fight kill and die  
Just to hold you hold you like I do_

_Baby tell me does she love you like the way I love you  
Does she stimulate you attract and captivate you  
Tell me does she miss you existing just to kiss you  
Like the way I do_

_Tell me does she want you infatuate and haunt you  
Does she know just how to shock you electrify and rock you  
Does she inject you seduce you and affect you  
Like the way I do_

_Nobody loves you like the way I do  
Nobody wants you like the way I do  
Nobody needs you like the way I do  
Nobody aches nobody aches just to hold you  
Like the way I do  
No, no no...  
Tell me does she love you like the way I love you  
Does she stimulate you attract and captivate you_

_Baby, baby, baby  
Tell me does she miss you existing just to kiss you  
Like the way I do  
Tell me does she want you infatuate and haunt you  
Does she know just how to shock you electrify and rock you  
Does she inject you seduce you and affect you  
Like the way I do_

_Like the way I do_

"I'm finally over him Spied. Congratulate me." To Jude it was a goodbye and an acceptance of what he had meant to her. Spied did not say anything, knowing she was lying to herself. No one wrote a kick ass song like that could have not still cared about the object of said song.

"Angry chick music. She's definitely feeling better." She threw a throw pillow at him, which he caught easily.

"I'm glad I never had sex with you."

"Excuse me?! I am not bad in bed!"

"Relax Dude I just meant if that song was about me I'd be curled in a ball on the floor crying my eyes out." She relaxed a little. "I just bet, you're not bad in bed." He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. "With all those hours you logged in with Quincy."

"What were you keeping track or something?! Perv!" She threw another pillow, harder this time, hitting him upside the head. He threw it back at her and they both laughed.

"Come on Dude the bus isn't that big." She started blushing. "Dressing rooms, hotel rooms, bathrooms..." He sang. "Am I missing any?"

"Who told you about the bathroom?!"

"Wow I meant the one on the bus...Still don't know how you managed. That shower was barely big enough for one person."

"It actually works out better that way. The girl can brace her feet on the shower wall." Spied widened his eyes in admiration. She might be his bud, but she was still a hot chick.

"I take it back. Sleep with me." She shook her head at him and rolled her eyes. Boys. "Wait...What bathroom did you think I was talking about?"

_"_Er...Remember that club we took Sadie to?"

"You and Tommy disappeared...Oh...You dirty girl." She laughed. No one had ever accused her of that before.

"Why did you just call Jude a dirty girl?" Sadie asked walking in from the kitchen, plopping herself next to Jude. Spied filled her in and Sadie looked at Jude with wide eyes.

"Hey Sades I think I'm finally over him..." Jude said to change the subject. Sadie hoped so, because Jude had not had that carefree spark in her eyes for a longtime.

"That calls for a celebration." Sadie was dialing numbers before anyone could stop her, and had enlisted Spied's help with Jude's friends.

TMI

"Let's play I Never." Sadie piped up as a bunch of them sat around in the living room drinking. There was loud music blasting on the stereo and people hanging out all over the house.

"Aww come on that's kind of boring." Kyle complained as he took a drink from his plastic tumbler.

"Not my way." Sadie grinned. She was not done grilling Jude after all. "We only use sexual and nude experiences." Jamie relaxed figuring Jude would not wind up drinking much, if this was how they were playing it. He had never really seen her drink before. Sure they had sneaked a few bottles of cheap wine here and there when they had been younger, just to be rebellious, but she had never been that into it. Jude shook her head, not nearly drunk enough for this and continued to flirt with Sadie's college friend Josh. "Jude you have to play." Sadie insisted. Sadie's friend Jessica leaned over and whispered a little too loudly.

"I thought you said your sister was a prude anyway?" Jude's head snapped up and she glared at her sister.

"Who are you calling a prude?!" Everyone's attention became riveted on their argument.

"That was before. I didn't realize you'd turn into such a slut." Sadie teased.

"I only slept with one guy! That's more than I can say about some people!" Jude said sarcastically.

"Oh yeah well what did you have to do to keep a guy like him interested?" The sister's eyes locked in an intense stare off, until Josh interrupted.

"There's only one way to solve this." Everyone's eyes trained on him. "We play the game and keep score of who drinks the most." Jude sighed and nodded resignedly.

"Wait were you upset because she called you a prude or because she called you a slut?" Wally leaned over and asked Jude. She shrugged. She hated being labeled.

"I'll go first." Sadie volunteered. "I never slept with someone else's date while they were on said date." And Sadie wondered why Jude wouldn't share her experiences with her. Jude's eyes shot daggers at her as she mouthed the word 'bitch', before she took a drink. Of course she was the only one. Josh eyed her with even more interest now. Jamie frowned, unbelievingly at Jude.

"I've never done it in a moving vehicle." Kara, one of the G-Major interns said. Jude, Sadie, Spied and Jamie drank.

"I've never done more than 3 positions in one session." Someone said. Half of them drank, including Jude.

"I've never done it for more than an hour." Kara said. Most of them drank, but the girls wondered if some of the guys had been lying.

"I've never done it for more than 3 hours." Sadie said once again paying attention to Jude. Her sister predictably drank. Go Tommy! Sadie thought. She still wondered how her virginal sister had gotten the sex god.

"I've never done it in a body of water." Jessica said.

"Wait do pools and hot tubs count?" Spied asked and she nodded. Jude looked over at him.

"Where did you...?"

"The Hilton I think. Pool or hot tub?"

"Both...Which Hilton?" Both?! Jamie thought as another wave of shock hit him. Jude had never been that open about PDA and she had done that?!

"I don't remember..." Jude cringed, hoping it wasn't the same one, because that was a little icky. Everyone looked on in interest at their conversation. They took their drinks and continued.

"I've never had a threesome." Jude finally said, stumped for a good 2 minutes. Wally and Josh took a drink. Wally's friends all turned to stare at Wally in shock.

"What?! Marie and Sasha were bored and decided to de-virginize me." He named two of the Boyz Attack groupies that followed them from show to show.

"You weren't a virgin though..." Kyle said.

"They didn't know that..." Wally grinned.

"Go Wally!" Jude said. The game continued and Jude continued to drink more often than not, Sadie kept up, but Jude was definitely winning.

"I've never done it outdoors." Kyle said.

"Like in nature?" Jude asked, not sure if that's what he meant.

"Like outside." Kyle gave her a look. Jude remembered that time Tommy had dragged her to the rooftop of one of the hotels to watch the sunset and started blushing. He had bent her over the railing and...She took another drink, trying to cool her flaming cheeks.

"Where?" Sadie asked and Jude found herself answering automatically before she could stop herself.

"Rooftop of the Hyatt." Had she just said that out loud?

"Where haven't you done it?!" Sadie asked in shock.

"How about someone else's bed?" Jude jabbed at Sadie knowing she had used one of her friend's room's before.

"I've never stayed in bed for more than 3 hours." Kara said. Jude, Sadie, Josh, Spied, Jamie and Jessica all took a drink. Sadie was curious now and named an outrageous amount of time.

"I've never stayed in bed for more than 8 hours." Jude glared at her sister and put the liquor to her lips, again. Sadie's eyes widened along with those of them who were still sober enough to care. Jamie looked on in disbelief as Jude took drink after drink.

"I've never had sex more than 3 times in one day." Someone said and of course Jude drank yet again. She was pretty far gone at this point so when Sadie went before anyone else could, she barely noticed.

"I've never had sex more than 8 times in one day." Sadie watched Jude scrunch up her nose in concentration. Damn too high, she thought, until Jude finally took another drink. "When the hell did you have time to sing?! You were busy screwing like bunnies!" Sadie asked in disbelief. Jude just shrugged. Spied noticed how pale Jamie's face had gotten. It was hard to see your dream girl knocked from her pedestal.

"Well they took advantage of the tour bus too you know." Kyle volunteered. Jude shot him a death glare and then one at Spied.

"If you say anything about bathrooms I'll mention Lola." Spied closed his mouth.

By the time everyone was too drunk to play Jude had won hands down, not that anyone but Jamie cared at that point.

Months Go By

Jude finished her sophomore album to celebration at G-Major. She had done it in good time, making everyone happy. Georgia knew this one was even better than her first, carrying a depth that Jude had not exhibited before the tour. She still wondered who had broken Jude Harrison's heart, but did not pry. Jude had some time off now, as they all waited for the producer to do any finishing touches he needed to and then the masters had to be taken to New York. She spent more time with Jamie, since she hadn't while she'd been wrapped up in her music. Her tour was scheduled to start right after the album was to be released and she found herself a little nervous at the idea. She had never been the headliner before and she didn't know if life on the road would bring back too many memories. He had never called her since coming back from Asia and she assumed he had forgotten about her. She still wondered how he did it, because she could not forget.


	30. Chapter 30

_The song in this is Far Away by Nickelback. thanks to everyone who's been reviewing. I'm glad you guys are still interested after all these chapters._

**Chapter 30**

__

Miles To Go

Tommy finished his album, not so coincidently at the same time as his contract was about to end. He had a meeting scheduled with Darius in a week's time to present his solo album. He couldn't wait to get it over with, so he could finally move on.

As Tommy sat in front of the desk he tried to look at Darius expectantly, as if he cared. Darius had a grim look on his face as his dark eyes fixed on him.

"You've been working for months, wasting my money and this is the shit you come up with?!" Darius yelled tossing the CD onto the desk where it proceeded to slide onto the floor. Tommy gave Darius that cocky look he had always detested.

"It's not shit." Tommy said ironically, because of course it _was_ crap.

"You did your little experiment it's time to get back to the real world Tommy. You know where you belong." There it was, the reason Darius had been so indulgent. He thought once Tommy had gotten this attempt at a solo career out of his system he would meekly go back to Boyz Attack. Tommy's face was a mask as he looked at his former manager.

"Yeah I do D. and it's not in Vancouver." No hint of doubt was in his voice. He wondered if he should have pretended to be more upset about his album being trashed, but decided it was too late now. "I fulfilled my contract. We're done here." He stood up before Darius could continue his tirade and left his office.

__

Plan Forward

Tommy was in his Vancouver apartment packing a couple of last minute things as there was a knock on the door. He opened it to see his former band mate, standing there.

"What are you doing here Chaz?"

"You could at least invite me in." Tommy opened the door wider and nodded towards the living room. There were moving boxes stacked around the room. Chaz looked at him in surprise.

"What do you want Chaz? As you can see I'm busy." Same old Tommy, Chaz thought, thinking he was better than everyone else.

"You tried your solo thing. It's time to come back Tommy." Tommy looked at him in amusement.

"Did Darius tell you to come here?"

"He said your album was missing something..." Chaz said with more diplomacy than Tommy thought him capable of. When Tommy didn't answer, Chaz sighed. "Where are you going?" He nodded at the boxes.

"Toronto." There was only one reason for Tommy to go there and they both knew who she was.

"Huh...Really...Jude didn't mention anything last time I saw her." Chaz goaded Tommy out of habit, not out of any real need to annoy him, but it worked just the same.

"What are you doing seeing Jude?!" Chaz shook his head at Tommy's over the top response.

"You pitiful bastard. You act like she's still your girlfriend." Tommy glared daggers at him. "And she acts like she still belongs to you..." Chaz found he was glad that Jude had said no to him. She was a little too complicated and dramatic for his taste. Tommy looked at Chaz in surprise. Had he actually said something nice for once. Did Jude still miss him? Tommy found himself offering Chaz a drink and they sat down together for the first time in months. Chaz didn't volunteer any more on Jude and Tommy found himself unable to ask.

"You really aren't coming back are you?" Tommy shook his head.

"Tell the guys...Tell them I'm sorry." Chaz was surprised at his words. He had never heard the other man apologize for anything before, both of them had been too arrogant for that. "I'm just not in that place anymore." When Chaz left they still weren't friends, but they understood each other a little better.

__

And It Begins Again

Jude packed her last bag and looked around her room again, making sure she wasn't forgetting anything. She wondered if she should look for a place of her own when she got back from the tour. Her father had seemed stressed by all of her friends constantly popping in and it would be nice to have a place to rehearse. Her CD had just been released and was high on the charts, surprising no one, but her. She was nervous and excited, but also a little sad. She had been in this place a year ago, knowing she would meet him, but not for a second thinking she would like him, let alone love him. She had gone on a few dates with guys she met through G-Major, but her heart had not been in it. She had the weirdest knack of attracting guys who became good friends.

"Jude the car's here." Sadie said as she poked her head in the doorway. Jude nodded and they both grabbed her things before heading downstairs.

Jamie was waiting for her in front of the house. He had been pacing back and forth making the driver of the hired car wonder if he was a stalker. The driver got out of the vehicle when he saw the two sisters come out. Sadie gave her a hug before going back inside claiming she had a big test to study for. The driver quickly started taking bags and loading them into the trunk as Jude walked over to greet Jamie.

"Hey...I thought you had to work today." She smiled at him, a little distracted by thoughts of her pending tour.

"Jude I have something to tell you." She gave him a curious look waiting for him to continue. Instead of speaking he grabbed her by the upper arms and pulled her in for a deep kiss. Before she could respond one way or another he had let go and backed up a step. She looked at him a little stunned. "I love you Jude."

"Jamie...I..." She wasn't sure what to say. She hadn't thought of him as more than her best friend in a longtime.

"Just think about it. I'll see you in a month." He had a vacation coming up and they had planned for him to meet up with the tour then. He nodded towards the waiting car. "You should get going." She walked towards the driver, her thoughts racing. Should she give him another chance? What had she felt when he had kissed her? Although a part of her would always love Tommy, she had accepted that, was it time to move on?

__

A New Life

"Tommy Q. it's good to see you." Georgia said as she got up from her desk. He gave her a kiss on the cheek and they hugged briefly. They both sat down, and got caught up.

"Tommy I've known you a few years now right?" He nodded, not knowing where she was going with this.

"I never knew you could write songs." He frowned. He hadn't mentioned his real solo album yet.

"What are you talking about Georgia?"

"You have heard Jude's newest album haven't you?" He shook his head.

"Only one song." He turned off the radio, whenever her voice came on. He still missed her too much, to listen to the new album. It would have made him crack and he couldn't until the papers were in his hands. He had heard the album was doing great though. Georgia opened her desk and took out a CD handing it to Tommy.

"Read the credits." He opened the case and took out the sleeve. He scanned the names of the songs and realized 4 of them, including Broken, had been the ones they had written together and she had named him as co-writer. This girl, whom he had never been able to get out of his mind or heart, had amazed him again. She had not taken the easy road, instead doing the right thing. He wondered how many questions she had gotten for including his name on the credits.

"It's an amazing album, better than her first. Your joint collaboration seemed to have made a big difference." He shrugged not sure what to say. It was obvious Jude had never mentioned their relationship to her.

"How is Jude?" He asked nonchalantly, trying to mask how interested he really was in the answer.

"She's good, just kicked off her own tour. Her album is doing phenomenal." He knew that. He wouldn't have come to Toronto if she was still here. He would have been too tempted to see her face. "Compared to the Boyz Attack tour this one will be a cakewalk for her." When he didn't respond she spoke again."So what can I do for you Tommy?" Georgia finally got down to the real question. She knew he wouldn't drop by for just a visit.

"My contract is over. I was wondering if you were looking for a new solo artist." Georgia looked a little surprised.

"I thought you were working on a solo album for Darius?"

"I was and he wasn't satisfied with it." Tommy said a little smugly, making her wonder. He didn't exactly seem broken up about the fact that his hard work was being rejected. Only one person would know why it didn't bother him in the least. Georgia gave him a penetrating look.

"Did you do something Tommy?" He looked innocently at her.

"Like what?"

"Like sabotage the album?" He smirked at her.

"You think_ I _would come up with something like that?" Georgia thought about it and decided that there was someone who might. She let it go though because if he was free and he wanted to be here she would not be the one to look a gift horse in the mouth.

"Do you mind if I ask you a question?" He shrugged. "Why pick G Major? Not that we're not thrilled to have you...but there are much bigger companies, especially in the states, dying to sign you."

"I need to be near Toronto." He needed to be near her. Georgia didn't ask him why and for that he was grateful. It had been a longtime and he wasn't 100 percent sure she would want him back in her life. He had seen the tabloids and she had been linked with a few guys, but he knew better than anyone they were mostly lies. There had been that one spread in Solid magazine that had had him doubting though. Jude was naked underneath a sheet leaning against an equally naked Mason Fox with the sheet covering him also. She had his cowboy hat on her head and his arm draped on her casually. The story was titled Rock Meets Country and was done to promote their new duet single, Who Am I Fooling.

"So have you got anything to show me?" He nodded.

"I actually have a lot of stuff I've been working on. There's one song I want as my first single right away. I could do a rough cut now if you have a free studio. You can tell me what you think." Georgia nodded and went with him to studio B, leaving him in the capable hands of Roger.

__

This time, this place  
Misused, mistakes  
Too long, too late  
Who was I to make you wait  
Just one chance  
Just one breath  
Just in case there's just one left  
'Cause you know,  
You know, you know

I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long  
I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
And you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask  
Last chance for one last dance  
'Cause with you, I'd withstand  
All of hell to hold your hand  
I'd give it all  
I'd give for us  
Give anything but I won't give up  
'Cause you know,  
you know, you know

I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long  
I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
and you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore

So far away  
Been far away for far too long  
So far away  
Been far away for far too long  
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted  
I wanted you to stay  
'Cause I needed  
I need to hear you say  
That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I forgive you  
For being away for far too long  
So keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go

Georgia felt a strange sense of déjà vu. Another artist had come in from months on tour and had just had to record a song that same day. A love song. There hadn't been any mentions of Tommy in the tabloids at all in quite a while, so Georgia assumed like the song said, whoever she was he had not seen her in some time. Georgia listened to the song and saw the possibilities. There was absolutely no way that Tommy had given Darius work of this caliber and he had rejected it. The song was damn good, but it was a rock ballad and not the Pop she had expected. She wondered if someone had influenced him.

__

Hope In Unexpected Places

Later on in his new apartment, he finally had the courage to listen to the voice he had avoided for over a year, the same voice that haunted his dreams. He slipped the CD into his stereo and hit play. As the music started he took the sleeve out and read the dedication.

__

To all of you, who seek inspiration in others. You have my deepest sympathy. -J

He smiled sadly, it was enigmatic, ironic and so true, just like her. She had looked for it in him and he had returned her trust by hurting her in the worst way possible. Track #2 started to play and his breath caught.

__

Snow falls on the city  
white on white  
It's the color of hope  
on an unforgiving night  
you kissed me into ruins  
sin on sin  
now I've gotta love your love letters  
written on my skin

I can't tell the stars from the downtown lights  
If I said I was truly over you  
my heart would say amen  
but I'd give in to the cold caress of 2 am.  
If I admit I can't get used to this  
will my heart break again?  
as I fall into the waiting arms of 2 AM

someone's scratchy music through the walls.  
sirens weavin' thru the streets  
I must have missed your call  
gathering up these nights  
black on black  
I know your voice like it's my own  
and it makes my heart go slack

I can't tell the stars  
From the downtown lights  
If I said I was truly over you  
My heart would say amen  
But I give in to the cold caress of 2 AM  
If I admit I can't get used to this  
Will my heart break again?  
As I fall  
Into the waiting arms of 2 AM

Oh  
If I said I was truly over you  
My heart would say amen  
But I give in to the cold caress of 2 AM  
If I admit I can't get used to this  
Will my heart break again?  
As I fall  
Into the waiting arms of 2 AM  
Of 2 AM

He needed this to be the truth.

His contract was signed the next day and they had the single out as soon as possible. Tommy had more songs lined up than Georgia had expected and she had not been able to keep him out of the studio while he finished Far Away. It was like he had a driving need to get it released. And he did because he needed her to hear it. He just prayed that it wasn't too late.


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

_Another Misunderstanding_

Late one night Jude and SME sat around on the bus, still too keyed up to sleep, from their concert that night. They had the radio going when a voice froze Jude in mid-motion. Spied turned the stereo up and they all listened as Tommy's new song Far Away came on. When it was over Spied went over and sat next to Jude on the couch.

"Do you think it's..." Jude turned to Spied with tears in her eyes. Although the tabloids had been pretty quiet about Tommy before she went on tour, she couldn't forget about the speculations about him and Cassandra Hayward. Or he could be with someone else even, by now.

"How could it be? I haven't heard from him in over a year." She closed her eyes as he drew her into his arms. Kyle and Wally joined them, surrounding her with their warm bodies. Sometimes boys could be really useful. He had done it. He had started his solo career and his single sounded amazing. She had always known he could do it, but confirmation that she was right held the tinge of bittersweet because she had always assumed she would be there with him.

"Is this a band thing or can anyone join in?" Mason Fox asked having just come out of the bathroom. He was Jude's opening act and they had invited him to stay on their bus since he didn't have his own band. The boys made room for him and Jude had to smile because she had the love of good friends even if she didn't have him anymore. She even let SME explain who Tommy was to Jude and why she had just broken down.

__

Declarations

There was a knock on the door and both Jude and Spied looked up. They had been working on a song together and the sudden noise surprised them both.

"Come in." She called. A man came in bearing a bouquet of roses. Spied frowned at his friend and Jude smiled.

"Smooth Andrews." He grinned at her and placed the flowers on the table before taking her in his arms for a hug. He glared at Spied over her head, but Spied didn't leave his seat. Jamie gave her a quick kiss on the lips before pulling back.

"Am I interrupting something?" He asked looking over at Spied again.

"We were just trying to work through some lyrics before the show. Speaking of..." She glanced at the wall clock. "I really want to get this one part right. Do you mind?" Jamie shook his head, knowing how Jude could get when she was inspired. He started to walk out, not sure she was happy he had shown up, when Jude put her hand on his arm.

"I'm glad you came Jamie." She smiled at him and he smiled back before backing out the door.

"You're not seriously considering getting together with Jamie are you?" Jude shrugged not understanding the big deal. She and Jamie understood each other. She didn't realize that Jamie had no inkling of the person she had become. "Don't do this to him Jude."

"Spied things are different now. We're not the same kids we were the first time we got together. I think there's a spark."

"You think there's a spark?" He repeated in disbelief. She nodded. "You and Quincy were like a raging forest fire." She looked away from him then unable to meet his eyes.

"What if that's not what I want anymore? Huh Spied?" That kind of intensity required an equally big sacrifice.

"That's who you are Jude. Passion, music, drama. That's not Jamie."

"You were the one who told me to move on."

"If you've moved on then why haven't you told your new 'boyfriend' what happened on tour? Don't you think he deserves to know?" She was silent. "You need passion. You're a rock goddess! You and Quincy used to make the walls smoke... Don't do this to him."

"I love Jamie" He was her rock; he was... safe...She closed her eyes knowing Spied was right.

"You're not in love with him though. Are you willing to risk your oldest friendship on a 'spark'?" Spied said with absolute belief, knowing she would make the right choice.

"What am I supposed to do huh? I have to move on. It's been over a year and I haven't heard from him once."

"Are you so sure that song wasn't for you?" She didn't want that kind of hope, because if it wasn't true the fall might break her. She closed her eyes again and shook her head.

__

Worth Waiting For

Tommy stood in front of the closed door, heart pounding, a manila envelope gripped tightly in his hands. He opened it quickly and drew out the sheath of documents, barely noticing the accompanying business sized white envelope, paper clipped to the back. He skimmed the pages quickly and was satisfied with what he saw. It was finally over. He carefully put the papers back in the envelope

Tommy went over to his desk and reached for a folded slip of paper with Jude's tour schedule printed on it, that he had snagged from G-Major. He searched for her most current location before going for his laptop.

There was a flight that would put him there in time to catch the end of her concert. He booked it and headed for his bedroom to pack a few things, careful to remember the papers he had waited so long for. His lawyer had called yesterday to confirm the divorce was final, but it wasn't closure until he could see the documents himself.

__

Finally

Jude was singing her second song of her three song encore when a dark haired man walked up to Jamie and Spied who had been watching her from backstage.

"Hey man." Spied said, not completely surprised to see him finally show up, especially after his single.

"Hey..." Tommy nodded at him. Jamie recognized him after a minute and spoke up in his typical sarcastic fashion.

"Little Tommy Q...I never thought I'd meet you." Tommy barely acknowledged him as he stared at Jude, listening to her beautiful voice, hearing the lyrics to Skin that could have been applied to him even if it had been written before they had ever met. He had more important things to worry about, than some geeky emo kid. When Jude finished her song Kyle and Wally got into place. She waited for Spied to come in with the opening chords to Broken and looked a little confused as Spied did not join her. Spied handed Tommy his guitar and headset and gestured for Tommy to get on stage. Tommy gave him a grateful look, having half expected Spied to slug him, instead of giving him a chance to get to Jude. Jamie and Spied watched as Tommy played the opening chords and started to sing.

__

I wanted you to know

I love the way you laugh

I want to hold you high and steal your pain...away...

They could not see the stunned expression on Jude's face from where they stood. She started to sing her part, coming in a beat late, her normally unwavering voice a little unsteady. Jamie turned to Spied with an incredulous look on his face. Spied did not miss the irony of the situation. Tommy was singing with Jude the song she had written for Jamie.

"What the hell is that about?" Jamie asked a little angrily. Although he didn't quite know the cause, he felt very uneasy. Jude had not known how to let him down and had been procrastinating. She had SME and Mason around most of the time so Jamie and she were rarely alone.

"Why do you think she said no every time you asked her out before?"

"Wait she told you that?!" Spied shook his head. That was not the important part.

"You know Jude was with someone on tour."

"Little Tommy Q?!"

"Look at them Jamie." Jamie turned his head back to the stage as Tommy continued to sing. "Think about why I let him go out there in my place. It's been over a year and she still isn't over him." Jude had come back from the tour different. She was no longer the same girl that had left reluctantly to join a boy band tour, but a more mature, more somber version as if she had lived years in the space of those few months. She had never spoken to Jamie about any of the personal stuff that had happened.

"That's bull. She was getting better." Spied just shook his head. You couldn't show the willfully blind anything they weren't ready to see.

"She's been pretending man." Jude had been getting good at putting on a mask to the world.

"Right...She's a horrible liar. Always has been."

"She had to learn..."

"What do you mean she had to learn? And what was the big deal about keeping his identity from me?" Jamie asked in frustration, gesturing towards the stage.

"He was married Jamie." No...His Jude would never have...

Jude's head whipped up at the voice, the one that still haunted her dreams. She thought she must be hallucinating as she stared into his eyes. His voice fell on her ears piercing straight to her heart. She could not think enough to even wonder why he was there. Her mouth opened automatically to begin her part. His eyes never left hers.

Jamie and Spied turned to stare at the couple again. It was just an act for the audience, Jamie insisted to himself. Then the song ended and they took their customary bow. The crowd was louder than usual, but neither of them noticed.The lights dimmed and the two of them walked off stage, passing Jamie and Spied without even acknowledging them, where they stopped a few feet away. They turned to each other again and Jamie saw her hand reach up to touch the small still pink scar on Tommy's forehead with the gentlest of caresses as if he would break. His hand grabbed hers, as she suddenly tried to pull hers away as if burned, and placed it against his cheek. She didn't have the will to pull back a second time, his warm skin felt so good against her palm.

He couldn't believe he was really here touching her. It felt the same, but different somehow, more important. Neither of them spoke, unwilling to break the spell. They never noticed the two men watching them, too caught up in each other.

"They're not even talking..." Jamie said, trying to find some shred of hope. Spied gave him uncharacteristically serious eyes.

"That's the point Jamie. They don't need to." Jamie could not keep his eyes from wandering back to them. Spied followed his gaze and saw Tommy lean in. "Come on Jamie. Let's get out of here." Spied clapped a hand on his friend's back and pushed him towards the next room.

"What are you doing here Tommy?" She finally said as he let go and her hand dropped limply to her side.

"I want another chance Jude." She was a little stunned to be seeing him and hearing this after such a long time. Their hands joined, fingers linking together so naturally she barely registered it. He leaned in and gave her the sweetest kiss before pulling back, leaning his forehead against hers.

"I.." She was interrupted by one of the techies, telling her the V.I.P. fans were waiting for her in the courtesy room. She nodded at him and looked back at Tommy. "I need to go." He nodded and unlaced his fingers from hers.

"I'll wait for you outside." She looked back at him once last time, still unbelieving that he was really there, before walking away.


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32**

__

He Waits

She saw him leaning against the wall outside of the building. He had waited like he had promised. She walked up to him and he looked at her with an unfathomable expression on his face. Inside he felt like his guts were twisted in knots. He didn't know what she would say.

"Why are you here Tommy?" She found herself asking.

"I want another chance Jude." He repeated his words of earlier. "I love you." She couldn't believe she still thought those words were truth after all this time. She closed her eyes and felt his thumb against her lower lip, rubbing gently. She let herself savor the touch before opening her eyes again to look at him. "Am I too late Jude? Have you moved on?" He gave voice to his biggest fear.

"I...I'm not sure...I need to think." The scent of his cologne and his mere presence were making her dizzy.

"Take your time Harrison. I'll be around." With an enigmatic smile he moved away from her and started across the parking lot towards his rented car. Spied saw everything as he walked towards her from the doorway.

"Dude seriously? You're gonna just let him leave? You've been obsessing over him for over a year." She looked at Spied and then back at the retreating figure. She took off after him without a word.

Tommy heard the quick steps behind him and had just enough time to turn and brace himself before she threw herself into his arms knocking him against the Viper. He held her off the ground as their lips met. They finally parted to take air in, their breath ragged. She looked over at the car he was pressed against and grinned.

"Nice car."

"It's just a rental. I wanted to test it out and see if I wanted to buy one."

"'I'll be around'?! What is that?!" He laughed as his lips brushed hers again.

"I was going back to Toronto to wait for you."

"Back to Toronto?" Her big eyes met his with puzzlement.

"That's where my new label is." Their fingers joined again as he looked into her eyes.

"G-Major?" He nodded.

"Even if you said you didn't want me anymore I wouldn't have given up."

"That sounds a little stalkerish Quincy." She teased in that way that only she could get away with.

"I love you Jude. I never stopped." He said seriously, brushing the loose strands from her face.

"I never stopped either." Their kiss was unhurried this time. Their lips melded as she tilted her head to deepen the kiss and their tongues stroked languorously causing the spark that was always between them to ignite. He pulled his head back and stared into her eyes.

"We should probably go." He said in a low husky voice and she nodded wordlessly. They got into the car and he was soon pealing out of the parking lot.

__

Slow

His lips were hot on her neck as she fumbled to put the key card in the slot. When she finally got it open they stumbled into the room, his mouth hungry on hers. She pulled away from him as his fingers started to slip underneath her shirt.

"Stop." She said a little breathlessly. He looked at her in confusion. "I think we should take this slower."

"You're not having doubts about us are you?" She shook her.

"I just need to know this is real before we sleep together again. I need to know you're not my imagination and that you'll still be here tomorrow. Is that...okay?" He nodded and started to reach for the doorknob.

"I'll see you in the morning." She grabbed his arm before he could move away.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"I was going to get a room."

"Stay with me...Please...Just no sex." He nodded and she pulled him further into the room.

They lay on the bed side by side, both of them unable to sleep. He turned his head to stare at her profile and his fingers itched to touch her pale skin.

"Jude when you said we should take it slow...How much time are we talking about?" He said into the inky darkness, with only the outside street lights offering any illumination. He could hear her soft breathing and even that turned him on. Everywhere their skin touched it burned. She bit her lip, his mere presence reminding her of how amazing they were together and it had been so long...

"How long has the show been over?" He stared at the clock.

"3 hours?"

"Good enough." That got a small laugh from him as she climbed on top of him and pressed her lips down on his. His arms wrapped around her and pulled her closer. He flipped her over so he was on top, his weight digging into her and his lips hard on hers.

As she started to unbutton his shirt, while he leaned over her, a white gold chain spilled out. Her heart ached as she stared at the outline of the familiar moon and stars, reflecting the faint light.

"A little feminine for you, don't you think?" Her fingers reached for the clasp to undo it and he bowed his head lower so she could take it off. He took the delicate chain from her and put it back where it belonged. He pulled his shirt over his head and helped her slip hers off too. His lips found the swell of her breast at the edge of her lace bra and he teased the soft skin with his tongue.

"Tommy...Fuck me..." Her silken voice wrapping around his name and those words, made him impossibly harder. She reached for her bra clasp while he pulled her jeans off. They paused long enough to kiss, but the remaining barriers of clothing were driving them both a little insane. Her hands found the button of his jeans, and she had a hard time undoing them, his arousal was pressed against the denim so tightly. Between them they finally got the button undone and the jeans unzipped. He reached for his wallet and pulled out a condom, making her eyebrow raise.

"Did you expect me to jump you?"

"I hoped?" He gave her an innocent smile that made her grin. She wiggled out of her panties and pulled his boxers off as he unwrapped the latex.

She drew up her knees as he knelt in front of her. His mouth came down on hers hard, showing her how much he had missed her. He pushed into her flesh, just the barest degree, holding onto control by the barest thread. Their fingers linked on either side of her head.

"Say my name." He demanded as he sank in another inch.

"Tommy..." She gasped. He pushed in a little more and her hips lifted to meet his thrust. "Take me...All of me..." He sank himself to the hilt, but did not pull back, savoring the tight glove of her body holding onto his hardness. "Fuck me Tommy." Those were the words that sent him over the edge. He pulled out almost all the way and pushed in, in a long hard stroke that had her emitting a small cry. Their lips met again, as their mouths opened, their tongues tangled. He twisted his hips as he thrust in wringing whimpers out of her as she begged him to continue, to go faster, harder. Her voice was like honey as it clung to his senses.

With her arms still pinned above her, his mouth worked at her breasts, taking as much in as he could. He sucked and bit, causing her to writhe underneath him. She met his pounding strokes and tightened her inner muscles in that way that drove him crazy. His pace slowed as he heard her ragged breathing, signaling her release. As she started to go, he pushed against her, brushing along all of her most sensitive nerve endings. She felt herself almost black out from the onslaught of sensation hitting her as he moved against her. His teeth made a perfect imprint on her shoulder as her contracting muscles triggered his own release. His pounding heart pressed against her breast as he pressed the entire length of his body against hers. She cradled him against her as they let the adrenaline rush fade into languorous pleasure.

__

It All Comes Out

As they lay in bed limbs tangled she studied his face intently and her fingers brushed the scar on his forehead once more.

"What happened that night?" He looked away, not wanting to answer her, knowing she would blame herself. She took his face in her hands and looked deep into his eyes.

"It's not important Jude..."

"Tommy if we're going to make this work, you have to be honest with me. No more secrets."

"Can't you guess why I left in the middle of the concert?" His eyes were intent on hers and she shook her head, not wanting to believe what he was saying. "I was heading for the airport." Her hand flew to her mouth.

"Oh my God!" His hands took her wrists gently.

"It's not your fault Jude." She just shook her head as her eyes started to fill. Why was it he was the only thing that could make her cry like this? He took her in his arms and held her until she had calmed down.

"I'm sorry I didn't go back to see you..." She whispered into the dark.

"I'm sorry I let you go in the first place." Her head cradled against the crook of her shoulder as his fingers stroked her bare back. "Hey..." He said catching her eyes in the darkness. "We're here now." And she smiled as he met her in another kiss.

__

Quality Time

"Tommy no more..." Jude begged as his mouth found her too sensitive clit, his stubble grazing her inner thighs. He had been insatiable last night and this morning. She was sore, rubbed raw everywhere and her muscles ached from overuse. His cell phone started to ring on the nightstand giving her a reprieve. He reached for it and answered impatiently.

"Georgia..." He said surprised, sitting up. "Sorry. I know I was supposed to be in the studio. Something came up." Jude grinned over at him and ran her nails up his spine, sending an involuntary shiver of pleasure through him. " I uh need some time off." He put his hand over the receiver and looked at Jude. "How long is the tour?" She raised 3 fingers.

"3 months." He said into the phone.

"Yes I'm serious."

"Yes it's important. The most important thing in my life..." He caught her eye and they shared a look. "Hey do you know if Jude Harrison needs an opening act?" Jude couldn't stifle her laughter, before she clamped her hand to her mouth.

Georgia shook her head, recognizing the owner of the musical sound right away.

"You'll be a special guest. Debut the songs you think are ready Tommy. I trust your judgment."

"Thanks Georgia." He grinned.

"Oh and when the tour is over your ass is mine. Tell Jude to give me a call tomorrow." Tommy lay beside Jude and took her lips in a gentle kiss.

"She knows." Jude stared at him.

"Is that a problem?" She asked in a soft voice. They had never been able to be open about having a relationship before. Tommy's heart ached a little at her question.

"No Jude. I would announce it on national television if you wanted. But the press..."

"They'll be hounding us and following this tour like we're Brangelina. I get it."

"I just want to be with you for a while before the drama hits."

"I want that too." They only wanted each other; time and distance had never changed that.

Georgia hung up the phone and called E.J. into her office. She had a small smile plastered on her face. There wasn't quite anything like young love. Somehow Jude and Tommy fit, when she thought about it. The petite Asian woman walked in, noticing her boss's mood right away.

"E.J. cancel any studio time and publicity Tommy Quincy has coming up."

"Why? What happened?"

"You owe me 20 bucks."

"For what?"

"You were wrong. It was never Chaz." E.J.'s eyes popped wide in shock. Georgia could see the gears start working. "No E.J. No media until they want the public to know."

"But Georgia!" E.J. practically whined. This was so much bigger than Jude with Chaz. This was Tommy Q finding his way back to _his_ girl after an entire year.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter 33**

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No More Secrets

"What took you so long?" Jude lay on the bed staring at him, still feeling the need to touch him, to make sure he was really there. She traced the muscles of his stomach absentmindedly as he looked up at her. He got up suddenly and went to his travel bag as she watched him. He came back and lay down beside her, handing her a manila envelope wordlessly. Jude drew the sheaf of papers and skimmed them, noticing the date right away. Her eyes flew to his, and he simply stared back waiting for her reaction. Jude was never predictable and he had to know she understood why he had waited. Her hand went up to cup his cheek.

"Why?"

"Because you deserved better than I gave you before. Because you saw the real me and loved me anyway. Because I love you." She clung to him then and he breathed in her sweet scent, feeling that hole she had left, fill back up. She looked down at the papers still clutched in her hand and noticed the white envelope that had come loose from the paper clip.

"What is this?" She lifted the paper with his name handwritten on its surface. He followed her gaze and shrugged, figuring it must have been from his lawyer. She handed it to him and he pulled back to open it. It was a handwritten letter and he saw the signature at the bottom. Portia. Jude waited patiently as he read the words his ex-wife had written to him. She noticed the tension radiating from his body as his eyes moved down the page.

"What is it Tommy?" She asked worriedly as his blue eyes met hers.

He handed her the paper after he was done, with a grim expression on his face. She looked at him questioningly.

"No secrets." She looked down and started to read. Her blood ran between icy cold and red hot anger as she absorbed the words of confession. Fury was in her eyes as she finished and looked up at him.

"Where is she? I'll fucking kill her myself!" Tommy found himself almost amused by her reaction. Once he had thought her incapable of hurting anyone, but apparently for him she would do anything. "Why are you taking this so well?" She asked in puzzlement as he continued to gaze at her.

"When I was in the hospital the Alfa Romeo company called and asked if they could ship my car back to Italy to examine it. They wanted to make sure my accident had nothing to do with any flaws in their design, since they were about to release it on the international market."

"They found something..." She said not asking a question.

"At the time I was too busy recovering to think about it again, but I got a call after I got back from the tour."

__

"Hello I'm looking for a Thomas Quincy." The man on the line had a faint European accent.

"This is he."

"My name is Edwin Pavlov. I work for the Alfa Romeo company. We tried to reach you before this, but you were not available." "

"I was out of the country."

"Ah ...The reason I'm calling is we have the results of the tests we have done on your car. We went through every part piece by piece. We did extensive testing on what we could recover. "

"Did you find anything?" The night of Tommy's accident still wasn't completely clear in his mind, but he did remember it was strange how slow the brakes had responded.

"We did not find any design flaws as we feared we might. There was only one major problem we found with the car Mr. Quincy."

"What?"

"Let me ask you this. Was there an investigation done?" Tommy thought for a moment.

"Not that I'm aware of. They ruled it an accident, with excessive speed being the cause."

"Hmm...That is strange. Mr. Quincy the problem we found was tampering with the brake line. I'm surprised your police did not do an enquiry. It was a pretty obvious job." Tommy was still, while inside his heart pounded double time as he took in the words.

"Thank you for calling me." He said through suddenly dry lips.

"Would you like me to send you a copy of the report? In case you want to pursue the matter?"

"That would be great." He hung up and sat down with too many thoughts running through his brain. There were only two people that had easy access to his car keys that day. Jude was the one who had left him, not that he would believe she would ever even think of doing something like this. She simply didn't have it in her, to deliberately hurt anyone.

The other woman came to mind and overwhelmed him. Had he hurt her so badly she felt the need to kill him?! He tried to put the thoughts away, unable to cope with the implications. It could have as easily been some obsessed fan for all he knew and it wasn't like there was solid proof he could present to reopen the case. The car was in pieces in Italy.

"What are we going to do?" She asked. 'We' he liked that she said it like that.

"I was pretty awful to her...And she's out of our lives now..." Jude looked at him in surprise. Where was the slightly angry, bad boy she had met?

"She needs help."

"She's Darius's problem now, not mine." He pulled Jude back into him and kissed her, closing the subject as his fingers stroked her silky skin.

__

Go Away! We're Busy!

Spied and Kyle walked up to Jude's door and Spied knocked loudly. There was no response. Tommy didn't even pause his movements at the noise as his lips met Jude's.

"Jude the bus is leaving soon! Are you almost ready?"

Tommy pushed deeper into Jude causing her to bite her lip to stifle a moan.

"Jude! Are you in there?"

"We'll meet you there!" Tommy finally yelled towards the door. Spied and Kyle looked at each other and shook their heads.

"Sound-checks at 4. It takes 2 hours to get there!" Spied informed the couple.

"Remember to drink plenty of fluids!" Kyle shouted through the door before the two of them headed for the bus. "Remind me to request a room on the opposite side of the hotel." Kyle said as they walked away.

"That loud?"

" Well it wouldn't have been so bad if they stopped for more than an hour at a time."

"All night?!" Spied was seriously impressed.

"I finally passed out around 4. They woke me up again at 8 though."

__

Introductions

They made it to the concert hall about 10 minutes before the sound check. Jude was walking a little stiffly and glared at Tommy every time he quickened his pace. He laughed as he took her hand and lifted her up over his shoulder in a fireman's carry.

"Well hello." Tommy spun around to come face to face with Mason Fox. Tommy lowered Jude down and stared at the other man with an unfriendly expression on his face. "Tommy Q. I've heard a lot about you." Mason grinned at a smiling Jude. Mason noticed the scowl on Tommy's face and looked at Jude questioningly. Her eyes turned to Tommy's face as well and she looked confused. Understanding dawned on Mason. He knew jealousy when he saw it, not that it had ever been over a girl.

"Um Tommy this is Mason my opening act." Jude said trying to dispel the uncomfortable silence. Tommy simply nodded at him, ignoring his outstretched hand as he held Jude possessively.

"I take it you saw our pictures in Solid" Understanding dawned on Jude now too and she smirked at Mason. Tommy did not like their interaction one bit.

"Don't worry about me and Jude." Mason winked at her and pulled Tommy's face in for a big wet kiss before he knew what was going on. "You're much more my type." With that he walked away leaving a stunned Tommy and a laughing Jude.

"Did I mention he's gay?"

"Tell me that was your hand that pinched my ass." That sent her into another fit of hysterical laughter.

Tommy disappeared for awhile, after the sound check and Jude wondered where everyone else was as well. Mason found her and they had lunch together, while he grilled her on all the juicy details. He had been asked to keep Jude busy while Tommy and SME were busy. Jude bit her lip and her eyes constantly strayed to the door whenever anyone entered.

"So are you and Tommy together now?" Mason asked. Jude nodded absentmindedly. He knew she had no idea what he was saying, but that was alright as long as she didn't go looking for Tommy.

Tommy found them an hour later and grinned at her while she frowned at him.

"Where did you go?" She pouted.

"I have a little surprise for you tonight." His warm breath tickled her ear and she had to smile. Mason shook his head.

"You two are so cute its almost sickening." He said before getting up to leave them alone.

That night Jude and Tommy stood backstage watching Mason as he finished his set. She started to walk away to finish getting ready when Tommy stopped her.

"Stay there." He said with his hands on her shoulders.

"What..." Jude asked. He kissed her gently, to distract her.

"Your surprise." As the crew set up for SME, Tommy took the guitar that one of the crew members handed him. SME came out and Tommy followed them on stage. Jude could only watch as Mason joined her. Tommy introduced himself and said he wanted the audience to be the first to hear his new single live.

"He really loves you." Mason said in amazement. It wasn't like Tommy Q's reputation had ever been good where the ladies were concerned. Jude could only stare, barely breathing as he sang, for her.

__

I wanted  
I wanted you to stay  
'Cause I needed  
I need to hear you say  
That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I forgive you  
For being away for far too long  
So keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go

Tommy finished to heavy applause, but he had eyes only for her. He handed the guitar to one of the crew members as he got off stage. Jude jumped into his arms and he held her off the ground as their lips met. It had taken him longer than it should have, but he had kept all his promises to her.


	34. Chapter 34

_Thanks to my reviewers and new readers who are enjoying this story. _

**Chapter 34**

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Meet The Parent

Jude jumped out of Tommy's Hummer before he had even shut off the vehicle. Her father and sister were waiting for her on the front lawn after she had just called to say she was back home.

"Dad!" Jude exclaimed as she rushed into her father's arms for a hug. Tommy walked up behind them and stood there silently waiting. When father and daughter separated Stuart took in the young man that had come home with Jude. Tommy looked every inch the bad boy with his worn leather jacket and sunglasses on. Sadie stood next to Jude and waited for their father's reaction.

"Little Tommy Q?" Stuart said, proud that he had remembered one of Sadie's favorite singers. The sisters looked at each other and the laughter soon overtook the grins they gave each other.

"Uh I prefer Tom or Tommy." _Or fuck me harder Tommy. _Whoa! Where the hell had that come from? This was Jude's father he was standing in front of! Dumb Ass! He tried to focus on what the older man was saying.

"So Tom how did you like the tour?"

"It was great..."

"Should I put him out of his misery?" Jude whispered to Sadie as they watched their Dad start talking about classic rock to Tommy.

"Did he do anything wrong recently?"

"No..." Jude sighed and walked up to them putting her hand in a very grateful Tommy's. Her father looked at the couple in surprise.

"Geez Dad why did you think he came home with me?"

"Yeah Dad. Do you think Little Tommy Q just follows girls home for no reason?" Sadie added, enjoying teasing both of them. Stuart invited Tommy for the dinner he was in the process of making. Sadie grinned at Tommy and added her request for him to stay. He knew it would look bad if he said no.

Jude looked over at her best friend's house and sighed internally. He had not returned any of her calls after leaving the tour suddenly. She didn't want this to be the end of their friendship and hoped now that she was home she could repair what she had inadvertently damaged. She should have told him from the beginning that she was in love with someone else. Of course at the time she had never expected to see Tommy again, unless it was like in that Dido video where the two lovers passed each other at some premiere or other. She squeezed Tommy's hand thinking that song White Flag could so easily have applied to her, if he hadn't come after her.

Tommy and Stuart were left to bring Jude's bags in as she and Sadie caught up.

"So bringing Tommy home to meet Dad. Big move. Who's idea was it?" Jude shrugged. They hadn't exactly talked about it, it was just assumed that he would give her a ride home. He said he wanted to see where she had grown up.

They made it through dinner, not too awkwardly, letting Stuart dominate the conversation with music talk. Sadie had not been very helpful though when she found out Tommy spoke Italian too. Tommy choked on his seafood pasta when Sadie mentioned mussels being an aphrodisiac in Italian and Jude's hand somehow found its way to his inner thigh at the same time. The two sisters were apparently out to kill him. Jude he would get even with later...

"How do you like my special pasta Tommy?" Tommy coughed again as Jude's fingers started to dance lightly across his groin.

"It's uh...very good sir." Sadie could see from across the table that Jude was obviously distracting Tommy in some way. They shared a grin as Stuart launched into the musical genius of Bob Dylan. The situation was humorous to say the least. Tommy Q heartthrob extraordinaire was having dinner with them as if it was normal for him to go home to meet a girl's parents.

Stuart sat on the couch and looked towards the front door once again. Jude had gone to walk Tommy out 20 minutes ago and still wasn't back.

"What's taking Jude so long?" He started to get up, when Sadie spoke from her chair.

"You don't want to go out there Dad." She warned. "They can get kind of intense." He frowned at her and stood up, walking over to the window. What he saw there was not something any father should have had to see. Tommy had Jude propped up against the hood of the Hummer, her legs wrapped around his waist as their lips moved hungrily against one another's.

"Dad did you just yelp?"

"How well does she really know him Sadie? Doesn't he have a bit of a reputation?" He asked as he sank back onto the couch. Sadie looked at her father in amusement.

"I don't think you can get rid of him..." If a year of separation had not changed their feelings for each other, then Sadie couldn't picture Tommy going anywhere.

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Best Friend

It was 2 a.m. and the house was dark as Jude gently closed the front door behind her. She was wearing a gray hoodie that was obviously too big to belong to her and a pair of shorts. She had been tossing and turning in her bed since 12:30 and had finally texted Tommy to tell him she couldn't sleep without him. Surprisingly enough he had called her back and said the same thing. It had brought a soft smile to her face. Then his voice had turned husky and low and it brought heat to her cheeks, as he told her what he would be doing to her if she was there with him. As stimulating as the conversation was, it would never be enough for either of them. That was why Jude was sneaking out of her own home like she was still in high school, to meet her boyfriend. Boyfriend seemed like such a bland word to her. He was so much more.

"So you finally made it home." A voice said out of the darkness, causing her to jump.

"Jamie..." She said in relief, making out his tall gangly form on the lawn. "You scared me." He had seen her come home earlier and had seen the time she had spent saying goodbye to Tommy. He had been unable to sleep and had decided to go for a walk when he saw her coming out the front door.

"Sorry..." They were both silent for a long moment before he spoke again. "You're going to him aren't you? Why are you sneaking out? Your Dad not like him?"

"Um...no I just didn't want to spring everything on him at once...Look Jamie I'm so sorry about the way I handled things with us...I never meant to hurt you...I just didn't know how to tell you..."

"You love him huh?" Jude knew he deserved honesty, at least, from her.

"So much...I can't breathe sometimes." She waited for his response patiently, knowing this probably hurt him too.

"I know what that's like..." He finally said, making Jude feel even more guilty.

"Jamie...You're my best friend..." He gave her a rueful smile.

"I was...I don't think you really need that from me anymore...Spied was right when he said I didn't know who you are now..." Although he could not see it in the dim, her eyes reflected pain.

"Jamie...You're still important to me."

"You should get going. It's late."

"Jamie...Are you okay?"

"Don't worry about me. I'll see you around Jude." He left to walk to his own house without another word. She stood there for a moment listening to the sounds of the night and they were beautiful, but the urging of her heart soon had her walking to her Mustang to make the trip into his arms.

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The Things You Do To Me

Tommy opened his door and drew her in without a word. His lips found hers and their bodies pressed firmly together. His hands were under her sweat shirt in a heartbeat, meeting the soft skin of her bare back. Her fingers were busy raking across his bare chest as their tongues stroked in a lazy caress. She raised her arms so he could pull her shirt off, revealing her braless state. His mouth found her nipple as he sank onto his knees. His wicked tongue flicked against the nub, making it hard as she moaned. He took his time in tasting her sensitive breasts, and then her knees grew boneless and she sank down in front of him. Their mouths met again, this time in urgency, as he pulled her shorts and panties down. She got them the rest of the way off and had her fingers on the waistband of his boxers. Jude pushed him onto his back, on the plush carpeting, and straddled him. Her mouth moved to his cheek, then chin, then neck as she licked his salty skin. Her tongue left a wet trail down his chest as she slid down his body. She let her hot breath tickle the head of his erection causing him to shiver.

"Baby...Please..." He begged, as her tongue licked the tip of him, tasting him. His fingers tangled in her hair as she teased him, sliding her mouth down the length of him before moving back up. When Tommy was ready to just grab her and pull her up to sink himself deep inside her, she took him into her mouth. He groaned in pleasure as she worked her mouth on him, sucking as she retreated. He felt all his blood pulsing in one location and managed barely managed to stop himself in time. He pulled her up so she was straddling him again. Their lips met in an open mouthed kiss as the head of his erection pushed insistently against her heat. She shifted a little and lowered herself onto him as his hips thrust up. She gasped as he filled her completely. He started a rhythm that had both of them breathing hard. She met his thrusts, sliding her sensitive nub against his skin.

Tommy's arms wrapped around her back, pulling her down so they were chest to chest. He rolled them both over, still inside of her as his hands went underneath her thighs to hold her open for him. He pounded into her hard causing her let out a small scream. Her nails dug into the carpeting as he rocked his hips against her in a way that had her muscles tightening. He lost control as he stared down at her naked body and his pace quickened, sending her over in an intense rush of sensation. Her contracting muscles sent him over the edge, as he gave a few final thrusts causing her to whimper. He fell on top of her and they kissed again, gently this time. Their fingers linked as they both lay there, gazing into each others eyes. Finally he moved off of her and got up, pulling her to her feet.

"Well your carpet is nice...Do I get to see the rest of the place?" He gave a short laugh and put one arm underneath her knees and the other at her back to lift her up into his arms.

"Wanna see the bed?" He grinned at her and headed for the other room.

"Here big eyes. I need to get going. You sleep." He said as he dropped something besides her in bed and then leaned down to kiss her lips gently. "I'll see you for lunch?" She murmured sleepily and he grinned as he got up to go. He had promised Georgia he would be back at work as soon as the tour was over and he needed to check in. Jude wasn't expected for another day.

When Jude woke up again, she was lying on something hard poking into her side. She raised a keychain with a pewter guitar and a set of keys on it. She wasn't sure what it meant other than they belonged to his apartment.

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Back To the Grind

Tommy came into G-Major ready to work when Georgia called him into her office. They exchanged greetings and she asked about the tour, but quickly got down to business.

"G I have some new stuff I want to get down. Can this wait?" He and Jude had come up with some new songs for his album and for her next one.

"Tommy sit." He did so finally noticing her serious expression.

"Darius Mills has a court injunction out on you. He claims the stuff you've been working on here was written before your contract with him expired. Therefore it belongs to him." Georgia watched him carefully for any signs of an impending blow up. He had never had that great of a temper, even in the best of situations.

"That asshole! He can't prove when I wrote that music!"

" No, but he can block your album for a longtime. Look Tommy we have our lawyers working on it, but it may take some time." Tommy stood up and looked at her with unhappy, but strangely calm eyes.

"Don't worry about it Georgia. I'll take care of it. Is Darius in Toronto?" She nodded.

"He wanted to meet with you as soon as you came back from the tour."

He walked out of G-Major and back to his apartment, quickly explaining to Jude what had happened. He told her to meet him for lunch and got what he needed before he left to find the man who would not get out of his life.

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Reckoning

Tommy walked into Darius's satellite office and barely noticed the receptionist checking him out.

"Darius in his office?" The brunette nodded and then protested as he walked past her.

"Wait he's got a conference call..." She sighed and wondered if Darius would fire her over this.

Tommy made his way to the closed door and opened it stepping in to an inscrutable looking Darius sitting behind his desk.. Darius had heard the bootlegs from Tommy's guest appearances at Jude Harrison's concerts and had known immediately that Tommy could make him money and that Tommy had sabotaged the album he had given him. Darius Mills was not a forgiving person when crossed.

"Tommy...I've been expecting you." He gestured to the chairs and Tommy sat. "I guess you've seen Georgia." Tommy simply continued to scrutinize the other man, his mouth set in a grim line. Darius did not speak either, considering himself the king of mind games.

"You owe me D." Tommy finally spoke.

"I owe you? How do you figure that? I made you." Darius gave him an amused look.

"You made Little Tommy Q. I'm not him anymore." Darius couldn't argue with that, Tommy had become an artist in his own right after all. His new music proved that. That was something Darius had never expected. "You covered up your sister's attempt to kill me." Darius's eyes showed vulnerability for just the merest second before his usual impassive mask slipped back into place.

"You can't prove anything." Tommy took some folded papers out of his jacket and tossed them in front of Darius.

"This is a report made from the Alfa Romeo company. They were looking for any design flaws, but surprise, surprise they didn't find any. They found only one thing wrong with the car."

"That doesn't prove Portia did it."

"Look at the last page." Darius flipped to the attached photocopied letter his sister had written.

"Even if that confession isn't enough evidence, the press would love a chance to dig deeper as to why there was no investigation."

"What do you want?" Darius was finally shaken. Tommy shook his head.

"See that's where we're different D. I don't want anything from you, although I think Portia should get some treatment. She seems to be in a bad place, but that's not my call." Darius nodded, waiting for him to continue. "All I want is a chance to work on my stuff without interference from you. Leave Jude and me alone and I swear I won't ever bring this up again. If we meet at a social gathering we'll be cordial, but I do not want to deal with you or your family again." Darius tried to salvage what he could from this disastrous meeting. He hated being at a disadvantage, but knew there was nothing he could do this time.

"Tommy...If you want a solo contract I'm willing to put big bucks into you. You call the shots." Tommy smirked. Big D. still looking at all the angles. He shook his head no.

"I'm happy at G-Major."

Tommy sat down beside Jude at the table and she looked up at him, her eyes full of questions. He gave her a small smile and she relaxed. She had wanted to go with him, but he had insisted he needed to face Darius alone. For too long the man had had too much influence in his life.

"Everything okay?" She asked. He took her hand and kissed her fingers.

"It is now."


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter 35**

_Old Lovers_

Jude and Tommy sat at the soundboard mixing his song I Don't Care. At first he had not wanted to use it on his album, because none of it had been true and he had been afraid it would bother Jude. She however would not let him lose it because it was a great song and once they had the orchestra come in it would be amazing. She had her feet on his lap as they listened to it one more time, when a woman's voice interrupted from the doorway.

"Little Tommy Q?!" They both looked up and Jude recognized her right away. She was dressed in a form fitting low cut navy dress, revealing a great deal of cleavage and had sunglasses carelessly perched on top of her head, looking glamorous and giving off a 'you're lucky to know me' attitude. Jude tensed and dropped her legs back onto the floor.

"Cassandra Hayward." Tommy stood up and hugged the other woman briefly. "What are you doing in Toronto?"

"Oh...I'm releasing my own CD. You're not anyone in the acting business without one these days. And I could ask you the same thing stranger."

"I moved here a few months ago and this is my new label."

"Hey I'm Jude Harrison." Jude finally spoke up.

"Hi..." The other woman just gave her a faintly bored quizzical look.

"This is my girlfriend and co-producer." Tommy said moving back and putting his arm around Jude, feeling the tightness in her shoulders. He looked down to see a closed off expression on her face. She had never been jealous of the women who threw himself at him, so it couldn't be that, but something about Cassandra obviously bothered her.

"Wow! I can't believe you're trying that whole monogamy thing again. I mean after that whole Portia disaster...I have to call Charlotte. She was hoping to hook up with you again. So was Eliza..." Cassandra reached for her cell phone and started the call. "I'm sure I'll see you later..." She said to Tommy before waving absentmindedly as she put the phone to her ear and walked off.

Tommy turned back to stare at Jude who had not moved from her seat.

"Charlotte C. Preston and Eliza Wolf I take it?" He nodded, a little thrown by her tone.

"Girl what's wrong?"

"You know there was a tabloid speculating you left Portia for Cassandra." Tommy looked at her in surprise. This had come out of left field.

"You know why I left Portia Jude. And since when do you believe anything the tabloids say?"

"You did sleep with her though." She said not asking a question.

"A longtime ago...Jude you know I had a past before I met you." He said getting a little exasperated at her interrogation.

"Yeah well it's not so easy to come face to face with it over and over." Some of his old groupies had even found their way onto her tour. She held her arms against her chest, feeling cold all of a sudden. He reached out to touch her, but she shook her head. He wasn't quite sure where her strange mood was coming from.

"I have no problem with you and Spied or even Jamie."

"I never slept with them..." She said softly, looking at him finally. "Can you honestly say you would be okay with how close Spied and I are if we had? Cuz you'd be lying. I know how possessive you can be."

"Only with you."

"I know...Logically I know it's not your fault. I just..." She looked down not sure how to explain what she was feeling. "I know I'm being irrational. But I can't help how I feel..."

"Jude how can I fix this? You know none of them meant anything to me." He looked a little afraid of her mood. She finally reached up and touched his arm.

"I just...I need some time to get over this. My Dad wants me to be home for dinner. I think I'll just stay home tonight." She had stayed with him every night since they had come back. She stood up and got her stuff together while he watched helplessly. He pulled her back before she could leave and kissed her forehead, before leaning his against hers.

"I love you Jude."

"I know. I do..." She gave him a small smile that didn't quite reach her eyes, before heading for the doorway. "I'll see you tomorrow."

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Daddy's Little Girl

Sadie, Jude and Stuart sat down to dinner for the first time since Jude had come back from tour. Sadie could tell he had something on his mind as he kept stealing glances at Jude. Jude picked halfheartedly at her chicken as she tried to make the self doubt and insecurities disappear. Tommy had always had a certain type he liked when it came to women and Jude would never fit the mold. And to have his old lovers show up like they still had a claim on him, made it hard for Jude to not feel vulnerable.

"Dad spit it out." Sadie finally said, hating the strange mood permeating the table.

"Jude my receptionist at work reads a lot of entertainment magazines." When Stuart had bragged to his colleagues about who his younger daughter was dating, their receptionist Eileen had informed him of the rumors. She looked up from her plate at him. She had not done anything to get landed in the tabloids since her tour. The press still hadn't even found out Tommy and she were dating, they had thrown themselves into working on both of their albums together. "This boy your seeing Jude...He's had a lot of press..." Stuart was trying to be diplomatic, but Jude could see through his attempts.

"You know his name Dad." She said simply before her eyes slid back to her meal.

"Fine Tommy has had a lot of press and none of it has been good. Is he still married?!"

"No...Divorced..."

"See what I mean? Married and divorced at 21. He's a heartbreaker Jude! And there are rumors of drugs and heavy partying." Jude wasn't about to say he was still only 20, at least for a couple more months. That would not exactly help his case.

"Dad!" Sadie warned, knowing how protective of Tommy Jude could get.

"I know you're an adult, but I don't want you to get hurt. You're still so young. Don't let sex cloud your mind. I think you should stop seeing him." Stuart said in a rush as if he had been holding it in all day.

"I'm not going to stop seeing him Dad. I know you're worried, but don't be. He would never hurt me." As she said it she knew it was true. Tommy would never knowingly hurt her again.

"How do you know that Jude? He's gone through so many women...How do you know you'll be any different?" As she thought about how to answer that, her earlier worries disappeared. That wasn't her Tommy, not anymore.

"Because he loves me and I love him." She wished now she hadn't left G-Major the way she had. He had looked a little lost when she had walked away.

"Love?" Stuart scoffed. "You've been together for less then 4 months...How could you possibly know you love him?!" Sadie caught Jude's gaze.

"Maybe you should just tell him Jude." Jude shook her head, not knowing how to tell her father she had been having an affair with Tommy last year.

"Dad you know Jude and Tommy were on the Boyz Attack tour last year." Sadie said for Jude, knowing her sister was having a hard time beginning.

"What does that have to do with anything? He was still married last year wasn't he?" Jude kept her eyes on him as she told him the hard truth, trying to gauge his reaction. He was her father and his opinion mattered to her.

"That's when we got together Dad." Stuart froze as the implications set in. "I'm not proud of it, but it happened. We fell in love. He moved here to be with me, even though we hadn't talked in over a year. He turned his life upside down just for a chance to be with me again." Stuart only focused on the first part of what she said.

"Jude...That just proves he can't be trusted! Seducing you when he was still married!"

"It wasn't like that." Her blue eyes, so like his own, burned into him and he knew he had to back off or he would risk losing her. "Dad you both mean so much to me. Please give him a chance. For me." Stuart took a long moment, but he finally nodded.

"Be careful Jude." Jude shook her head. She had been careful for too long. He deserved more than that.

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The Place To Belong

Jude slipped into the dark apartment silently and softly closed the door behind her. She had thought it would be better if she stayed home tonight, but found she couldn't leave things the way they were. She walked into the bedroom and stripped down to her panties as she watched him sleeping in the bed. She thought about putting on one of his shirts, but decided against it, knowing she wanted the feel of his skin against hers. She slid under the covers and pressed herself close to him, waking him from his light sleep.

"Jude..." He said softly and put his arm around her pulling her into his chest.

"I'm sorry." She said against his neck.

"For what? You were right. It would have bothered me a lot if you had old lovers popping into your life." He leaned down and kissed her temple gently. "Jude I can't change what I did in the past. But all those girls I slept with...It was just sex." She looked up and the city lights from the window reflected off her big eyes. "It never meant anything, until you....And I fell for you before we even slept together."

"Really?"

"Just ask Kwest." She leaned up and kissed him, shoving all the emotion she had into the kiss. He responded with equal intensity, trying to show her she was the only one he had ever wanted like this.

Later they lay facing each other, the adrenaline of sex, having not faded enough to let them sleep.

"You know that video for Dido's song White Flag?"

"I think so...That guy from Buffy was in it right?"

"You watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer?"

"What can I say? I have a thing for kick ass blondes." He said and leaned over to nuzzle her neck causing her to laugh. "So what about, this video?" He said as he drew back to look at her again.

"Could that have been us?" He shook his head. "How do you know?"

"I would never have given you up twice." She smiled and pressed closer to him, as he lay back, putting her head on his chest.

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Where You Belong

Sadie watched her sister in the doorway with amusement, as she put more clothes in her bag. This was the first time she had seen her in what seemed like forever and of course it was only because Jude needed more clothes. Sadie spoke up as Jude seemed to be lost in her own little world.

"When are you getting the rest of your stuff? I could use the closet space." Jude looked up distractedly and then back at the drawer. She could have sworn her favorite tank set was here somewhere.

"What are you talking about Sadie? Why would I move my stuff? I live here."

"When are you going to move in with him officially?"

"I'm only 19. I'm not ready to live with a guy."

"What do you think you're doing now? You spend every night together. You carpool to work." Jude just gave her a look like she was crazy. "You have closet space and a key. What do you call it?"

"Sleepovers?" Jude said trying to sound cute.

"If you officially move out I might actually see you one in a while." Jude frowned at Sadie. They were both busy with their own lives...Sadie with school and Jude with her and Tommy's albums. Wasn't _that _why they hadn't seen each other lately? "Oh and Dad wants to talk to you. He asked why you didn't bother to inform him that you were shacking up with Tommy."

"Why didn't he ask me himself?"

"Uh when was the last time you were home long enough to see Dad? Since you live with Tommy you should try to make time to see the rest of us you know?"

"For the last time I am not living with Tommy!" Was she? Sure he had given her a key, but that was just so it would be easier for her if he wasn't home when she came by. He had never asked...

"Jude your precious guitars are all at his place."

"That's because it's easier..."

"Because you're there all the time when you're not at work."

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The Talk

Jude let out a small snort as she thought of the conversation she had had with her sister, as she and Tommy sat at the dining room table eating Chinese takeout.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing, just something Sadie said." He waited for her to elaborate. "She seems to think we're unofficially shacking up." He gave her a funny look.

"I know." She gave a nervous laugh. "She can be so blond sometimes."

"Babe...You have tampons in the medicine cabinet. I don't know how unofficial that is."

"Oh..." She said a little stunned. "Are you really saying you're okay with us living together?"

"Jude I gave you a key as soon as we came back...What did you think I meant?"

"You didn't exactly ask..." She mumbled. He took her hands and made her look up at him.

"Fine I'm asking. Do you want to live with me?"

"No."

"Okay." Her mouth opened in shock.

"Okay?!" He gave her a small kiss and smirked at her.

"You can keep pretending we're not living together if it makes you happy." She gave him a petulant look that had him smiling at her. "Give it up Harrison. You know you can't sleep without me." She would not give him the satisfaction of answering, knowing he was right. Jude Harrison was living with Tommy Quincy. How the hell had that happened?


	36. Chapter 36

_The song in this next chapter is Picture by Sheryle Crow And Kid Rock_

**Chapter 36**

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Bath Time With Tommy Q

Jude had just smoothed shave gel onto her bare legs, when she heard the front door open. She was in the oversized tub soaking the stresses of the day away. He opened the door and found her there, hair up in a loose bun, cheeks flushed from the steam.

"Hey." She said when he still hadn't spoken. His eyes were too busy taking in the scene before him, most of her body was hidden by the bubbles except the pink tips of breasts poking through. Her legs were propped up on either side of the tub, putting suggestions into his head. He reached over his head and grabbed the back of his Polo shirt pulling it off in one motion. "What do you think you're doing?" She asked amused as she watched him appreciatively strip off the rest of his clothes. She still wasn't tired of seeing the body she knew so well.

"I feel a little dirty myself." She raised an eyebrow at him as he moved towards the tub. She moved one leg up, so he could slide in across from her. Water spilled off the sides, but neither of them noticed. He took her leg and placed her foot on his chest as he reached for her razor. As he slid the razor up her leg with one hand the fingers of the other followed the line by brushing against her skin, but stopping higher on her thigh than the foam was. He started on another strip, moving his way towards the inside of her leg. His fingers grazed against her outer lips teasingly as she threw her head back. As his fingers caressed the silky skin of her inner thigh, their eyes caught and she knew the instant he was going to move. Her other foot went to his chest and pushed him back against the porcelain. She grinned at him as he looked at her a little frustrated. They had promised themselves not to show too much PDA at work and sometimes the tension became almost unbearable until they could get home.

"You can't forget the other one." He gave a small growl and did not take nearly as much time on this leg. He threw the razor on the floor and moved her leg so he could slide between them to merge his lips to hers. She wrapped her wet arms around his neck and her slick legs found their way around his waist, pulling him in closer. As he slid into her, he savored the feeling of skin against skin. He was glad she had gone on the birth control patch when they had come back from tour. She moaned into his mouth as he pushed deeper. He filled her so completely as he paused to take her mouth again in a hungry kiss. She raised her hips to meet his thrusts, but the lack of traction in the bath, almost had them sliding under water a time or two.

His hand moved between their joint bodies to spread her nether lips wider, so he could slide against her clit more fully. He wrung small cries out of her, as he thrust inside her with a twist of his hips. Her hands dug into his upper arms as she planted her feet on the bottom of the tub, trying to keep them from sliding too much around the slippery surface. She stared into his darkened eyes as she could feel the tightness building from deep inside her. She threw her head back against the edge of the tub and his mouth came down on her vulnerable neck, biting lightly. His hands braced on either side of her head as his thrusts became more urgent. As she seemed to grow tighter around him, he knew she was about to find her own release. Their eyes met again and they saw the mounting pleasure start to overwhelm the other as her inner muscles contracted almost violently against his hardness, wringing a strangled cry out of him as he started to go. He pressed down on her gently as they lowered themselves more comfortably into the now lukewarm water. When his senses came back to him, he drained some of the water and ran the bath again. His lips found hers in a gentle kiss, tasting the smile on her lips.

"You know you're the only woman I've ever trusted enough to go skin to skin with."

"Ever?"

"I didn't exactly want a Little Tommy running around." She smiled picturing a toddler with his blue eyes and dark hair.

"Do you want kids?" She asked, curious, not that she pictured having a baby anytime soon.

"With you. Someday." That was a new promise.

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Caught

Sadie met Jude for lunch at a small café, finally having managed to find time to get together.

"What is with you two and bathrooms? Are you exhibitionists or do you have no self control?" Sadie threw the tabloid in front of Jude who winced when she saw the picture of her and Tommy entering the Men's room of the restaurant they had dined at the other night. It looked like the press had finally gotten their proof about Tommy and Jude's relationship and it was pretty scandalous proof at that. Jude knew it had to happen sooner or later and wasn't that phased by it.

"Oops..."

"You two live together. It's not like you have to sneak around." Jude looked at Sadie trying to hide the amusement from her face, but her sister could see it sparkling in her eyes. They both burst into laughter. When they both were able to stop, Sadie looked over at Jude. "Seriously do bathrooms get you off or something?"

"No! It's just he gave me this look..." Sadie could see how Tommy Q could inspire a little or a lot of old fashioned lust.

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Everybody Knows the Truth

Jude and Tommy walked into G-Major hand in hand, having absolutely no reason to hide their relationship anymore. The receptionist Diane told them Georgia wanted to see them as soon as they got in. They walked into her office and saw E.J. practically bouncing on the corner of Georgia's desk.

"Hey guys. Sit." Georgia gave them a warm smile which they both returned as they took their seats. "You saw the tabloid I take it?" They nodded, Jude looking only the slightest bit embarrassed.

"We're sorry it came out like that Georgia...I hope it's not a problem..." Jude said.

"A problem?! It's fucking fantastic!" E.J. chimed in startling Tommy and Jude.

"What E.J. meant to say is, it's definitely not going to hurt your careers." Georgia said rolling her eyes at her hyper assistant.

"Tommy Rolling Stone wants you to be part of a New Faces of Rock article they have coming out." E.J. said excitedly.

"Me? But I haven't even finished my album yet."

"You have two singles on the top 20! Besides with this news about you and Jude I can get you both on the cover." E.J. was practically salivating at the idea of getting 2 G-Major artists on the cover of Rolling Stone.

"Me too?" Jude asked.

"You guys are going to be the new power couple of music." Jude looked at E.J. in horror and turned to Georgia.

"Tell me she's kidding." Georgia shrugged.

"I'm sorry kiddo, but she's right. You both write, sing and produce. Your album has already gone platinum and it's almost a guarantee Tommy's will when it's done." Georgia grinned at them. "And you look adorable together." Jude groaned and Tommy just smirked at her.

"I'm going to issue a press release right away. I bet Rolling Stone will call as soon as they see it." E.J. said half talking to herself as she hopped off the desk and left without bothering to say goodbye.

__

Another Song

Tommy found Jude sitting on the sound booth floor of Studio B. She had her guitar and was working on a new song. She looked up at him and smiled. He sat down beside her and got comfortable too.

"Georgia thinks we should do a duet, now that we've been outed."

"Aww come on...You know how hard it is to write a good rock duet?" She half whined.

"You wrote Broken. And it doesn't have to be rock."

"Oh no...I am not writing some cheesy Pop ballad duet!" He took her hands and shook his head.

"Jude it's whatever we make it... "

"Fine. So do you have any ideas?"

"I was kind of inspired by White Flag. Two old lovers that aren't together anymore, but can't stop thinking about each other?"

"Something always reminds them of each other?" Their eyes met and held for the briefest moment before they got back to the music.

"Jewelry?" That was too close to their past.

"No it's got to be something they both have that's the same."

"A picture?"

"Okay...What's the guy like?"

"He's lived kind of a rough life, but he can't stop thinking of the girl he left behind. He's lonely and he looks at her picture. He wonders if he'll ever change."

"How did they break up?"

"He went on the road and cheated on her?" That's what the old Tommy would have done.

"And they can't get back together because they're with different people? Do they find their way back to each other though?"

"Of course." He grinned at her. She started to write on a piece of paper and he knew better than to interrupt her when she was in her zone.

"Okay how's this?" She strummed a slow melody and sang. "_Living my life in a slow hell. Different girl every night in the hotel. I ain't seen the sun shine in 3 damn days_." Tommy raised his eyebrow.

"I'm assuming that was aimed at me." And damn she had been accurate. "_Been fuelin up on cocaine and whiskey. Wish I had a good girl to miss me._" It always made her smile when he sang to her. "What's the hook?" She added the lines he had contributed to the paper.

"They're trying to forget each other right? So..._I put your picture away_. But they miss each other. _Sat down and cried today_."

"_I can't look at you while I'm lying next to her._" He remembered the guilt when he had slept with other women, even though they hadn't been together.

"_I can't look at you while I'm lying next to him_."

"Do they meet again?"

"Yeah..._I saw you yesterday with an old friend_."

"_How have you been_?" _How have you been_. It needed something more. "_It was the same old same how have you been_?" He nodded and sang it. "_Since you've been gone my world's been dark and gray_." He took the paper and wrote on a different section. He showed her and she sang it.

"_I called you last night in the hotel. Everyone knows but they won't tell. But their halfhearted smiles tell me something just isn't right....something just ain't right_." She leaned over him and changed the word. "I'm not that girl you know? I would never have waited around if you had cheated on me."

"I know. You dumped my ass like I deserved." He didn't say it emotionally, just like he was stating facts. As she turned her head he kissed her. This song was bringing out old feelings from both of them. Although it wasn't exactly their story, it invoked the same emotions of them missing each other. As their lips pulled apart she took his face in her hands and looked into his eyes. "_I just called to say I want you to come back home_." She whispered to him.

"_I just called to say I love you._" He added.

"_Come back home_..." They sang together. They grinned at each other. It still needed work, but they knew this song would be one to keep.

In the end it took them 3 days to get it presentable. They handed Georgia the rough copy and she loved the raw emotion in it. She watched the young couple and could see they brought that out in each other. This song also hinted at a part of their relationship, no one outside of their immediate circle knew. It was romantic and timeless, in its story of star crossed lovers.

(Him)

__

Living my life in a slow hell  
Different girl every night at the hotel  
I ain't seen the sun shine in 3 damn days  
been fuelin up on cocaine and whiskey  
wish I had a good girl to miss me  
Lord I wonder if I'll ever change my ways

I put your picture away  
Sat down and cried today  
I cant look at you while I'm lying next to her  
I put your picture away  
Sat down and cried today  
I cant look at you while I'm lying next to her

(Her)  
I called you last night in the hotel  
Everyone knows but they wont tell  
But their halfhearted smiles tell me somethin just aint right

I've been waitin on you for a long time  
Fuelin up on heartaches and cheap wine  
I aint heard from you in 3 damn nights

I put your picture away  
I wonder where you've been  
I cant look at you while I'm lyin next to him  
I put your picture away  
I wonder where you've been  
I cant look at you while I'm lyin next to him

I saw you yesterday with an old friend

(Him)  
It was the same old same how have you been

(Both)  
Since you've been gone my world's been dark and gray

(Him)  
You reminded me of brighter days

(Her)  
I hope to be coming home to stay

I was headed to church

(Him)  
I was off to drink you away

(Both)  
I thought about you for a long time  
Can't seem to get you off my mind  
I cant understand why we're living life this way

I found your picture today  
I swear I'll change my ways  
I just called to say I want you to come back home  
I found your picture today  
I swear I'll change my ways  
I just called to say I want you to come back home  
I just called to say I love you  
Come back home

Jude hit the button to stop the CD and bit her lip nervously. This was completely different from anything either of them had ever done.

"I know it's not really like our normal stuff..."

"It's great Jude and you both know that. I can't say I'm not surprised you decided to go a little country." Tommy shrugged.

"That's what wanted to come out." Georgia shook her head and smiled. They were both truly artists, letting the muse guide them instead of trying to force something out. It was kismet that they found their way back to each other.

_Making It_

Just as E.J. predicted Rolling Stone came knocking on the door, looking for their hottest new artist and his equally hot girlfriend. They would get the cover and the article would be titled.

****

_New Faces of Rock: Former Boy Bander Tom Quincy Finds His Edge and Gets His Rock Goddess._

"Last time they made me go nude. This time I'm wrapped up liked a ham." Jude was dressed in a black and red tapestry corset, an unbuttoned transparent white peasant blouse underneath, knee high lace up stiletto boots and a long layered black skirt with red thread going through it, that was tied up on one side to reveal a length of creamy white thigh and the height of one boot. The corset pushed up her breasts, in a way that gave her cleavage that did not appear in nature. Tommy was wearing a black silk shirt, black jeans and black heeled leather boots. He had several different silver rings on his fingers.

"Were you really naked?" She grinned.

"You'll have to ask Mason." He wasn't so worried about Mason as much as the other crew that must have been on set. The temperamental photographer yelled at them to keep their positions and stop talking. Of course his erection poking into me was kind of embarrassing" She whispered to him.

"I thought he was gay?!" Tommy said breaking concentration again, frustrating their photographer yet again.

"Oh it wasn't for me...Our photographer was pretty hot..." And they looked over at their current photographer with his balding head and beer belly. They both gave small laughs.

As the day grew on Jude was feeling practically suffocated.

"You suck Quincy." She hissed at him through her teeth trying to hold the expression the photographer wanted.

"Are you making a request for later?" He raised an eyebrow in her direction.

"I have to wear fetish wear and you get away with jeans and a shirt?! These boots are turning my toes into pretzels. They should have at least made you wear leather pants or something." She caught his smirk from the corner of her eye.

"They tried." She growled low in her throat. "Hey at least you're the 'Rock Goddess' while I have to be the 'former Boy Bander'" She sniggered. Okay that was kind of funny.

"You think they'll let you bring this corset home?" He asked in a husky voice. The two of them hadn't even noticed the photographer had stopped yelling directions at them, instead he was busy taking these amazing candid's. The interaction between them sparked like he had rarely seen. He hoped it translated just as well to printed image.

"Damn I kind of miss the Alfa." Tommy said after they had finished for the day. They held hands as they headed for the private parking garage.

"Babe you had it for like 2 days."

"But we had some great sex in it."

"We have great sex everywhere..."

"Ain't that the truth." He grinned and pulled her in for a kiss.


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter 37**

__

Trigger

Tommy and Jude sat in his new black Ferrari 599 coasting down an open stretch of road. After working most of the day, they had snuck out to get some fresh air and were finally heading back to the city as the sun began to set. The deejay played a song that was familiar to both of them.

"You don't hear this one on the radio much." Jude said happily as she reached to turn it up. Tommy's hand grabbed her wrist to stop her. She looked at him in confusion as he let her go and pushed the button to turn it off. "I thought you liked this song..." He had a grim expression on his face and she frowned at him.

"You left the CD in the Alfa..." Jude's eyes grew wide.

"You were listening to it..." She stated and he nodded, his eyes fixed on the road, as uneasiness assailed him. She put her hand on top of his and although hers was much smaller, it felt comforting to him.

"It's okay baby. I just don't like to hear it is all. So what are you in the mood for, for dinner?" He changed the subject and she let him, knowing there wasn't anything she could possibly say to make him feel better about a song.

"Hmm...Thai?" She said, in the mood for spicy food.

"Thai always makes me sweat."

"So do I...And you don't avoid me..." He grinned at her, letting her distract him from his memories.

__

Reaction

__

He was driving down the sunlit road in the Alfa, holding Jude's hand as her laughter was carried into the wind. She was singing along to the radio and he looked over and smiled at her. He removed his hand from hers to shift. When he reached for her hand again, it was not there. He looked over to the passenger seat and it was empty except for the pendant he had given her. When he looked up at the road again, it had somehow become nighttime and his foot hit the brake as a sharp curve came into view.

Tommy woke up sweating and all the feelings he had had that night she had left him, although muted, came up to engulf him. It must have been hearing that song today that caused everything to wash to the surface. He looked over at her sleeping form silhouetted by moonlight and reached out to make sure she wasn't just a dream. Her skin was cool, in the climate controlled room. Even in her sleep she instinctively curled towards him. He had a driving need to secure his place in her life, to make sure she would never leave him again. He did not want to ever feel that emptiness of losing her, ever again.

__

Hard Work and Dedication

"They're here!" E.J. yelled at the doorway of the studio where Tommy sat at the soundboard watching Jude in the booth. He jumped in surprise at her loud voice and looked back to see her waving a large magazine around. Jude looked up and stopped singing too, seeing the other woman practically bouncing as she left them. Jude took off her headphones as Tommy stopped recording. She opened the door, and Tommy was already out of the studio, as she hurried to catch up to him. She grabbed him around the waist, before he could get into the conference room, so he reached behind him and pulled her forward and off her feet.

"You know that's not fair Quincy. Just because you're stronger than me..." His lips found hers, just long enough to shut her up, and he walked them both into the conference room where a few interns, Georgia and E.J. were thumbing through the advanced issue of Rolling Stone. Jude picked up a copy nervously, she had been afraid she would look like a skank in the photographs, but was pleasantly surprised. Although the photographer had been kind of annoying, he did good work.

The picture on the front page was of Tommy sitting back on a leather couch, silver rings visible on the hand placed on his knee. His other hand was wrapped around Jude's waist as she leaned against him sideways, her feet crossed at the ankles, propped up on the arm of the couch, her full skirt fanning out to reveal just the tiniest hint of creamy thigh and the stiletto boots. She had her head turned, to stare up at Tommy, so part of her delicate profile and full lips were visible. His light blue eyes looked down right back at her. The photographer had caught the electricity between them, he had hoped for. It was almost like an art cover instead of one for a rock n' roll magazine. Georgia finished reading the article and looked up at the couple. Although other new artists had also made the magazine, these two had gotten by far the most space for their write up.

"Awesome photo shoot guys and the writer really liked you both too. Take the rest of the day off. Go celebrate." She did not have to tell the grinning couple twice as they snagged a copy and left the room.

__

The Plan

They sat at an intimate table in front of the window of an Italian restaurant that had been closed especially for them. The staff stood off to the sides whispering and watching the famous couple. The magazine was open to the article between them on the table. Georgia had been right, the writer that had interviewed the both of them, had plugged their music and expected even better things from them in the future. The magazine could not have come out at a more opportune time. Tommy's album was almost ready to be released and judging from advanced sales would debut in the top 5.

"I would never have been able to do any of this without you." Tommy said as he looked into her eyes. He took her hand and she smiled at him, euphoric for both of them. Her smile turned to a look of puzzlement as he pushed his seat back and got down on one knee. He pulled a small black velvet box, with a famous jeweler's name discreetly embossed on the inside lining, out of his pocket and opened it to reveal a large blue Asscher cut diamond in a platinum setting. "Marry me." He said, his eyes never leaving her widened ones.

The staff watched in amazement and a few had to turn their heads to hide shocked laughs as Jude's hand connected with the back of his head. Tommy held his own hand to the back of his head and got up, sliding back into his chair.

"What the hell Harrison?! That wasn't exactly the reaction I was expecting." He rubbed his hair lightly before dropping his hand. She glared at him.

"Are you completely insane Quincy?! I'm only 19!" She hissed through clenched teeth.

"Almost 20." He muttered. "I was married at 18." As the words left his mouth he realized that was not the smartest thing to bring up in this situation. Her glare grew even bigger if that was possible.

"Oh that worked out real well. Your wife only tried to kill you!"

"Does this mean you're saying no?" He got a determined gleam in his eyes, that had her sitting back warily.

"You want a different answer, ask a different girl." She knew that line from Working Girl would come in handy one day.

"You're going to marry me." He said with finality as he sat back too and smirked at her.

"What are you going to do? Kidnap me? Hold my 'Stang hostage?"

"No. I'll tell the press we're going to get married, and when you deny it you'll break my poor heart. North America will hate you." She looked at him, with narrowed eyes.

"You're seriously blackmailing me into marrying you?!"

"Yep." He said smugly.

"Why?" She asked seriously now, searching his cerulean eyes for answers. They were together. Why did a piece of paper matter to him now when it had meant less than nothing the first time?

"Because I want to be that guy for you. The one that sees forever in your eyes. I _am_ that guy because of you." She was stunned silent for a moment as she absorbed his words. _Forever_. That was all he had, had to say. She held her left hand out and he slid the ring on, to applause from the restaurant staff. She looked at the diamond in amazement and finally slid her gaze back to his face.

"Can we at least wait until I turn 20, so I'm not that teenage celebrity cliché that elopes with her boyfriend?"

"We're not eloping."

"What?" She asked confused and then understanding dawned. "No..." Her eyes grew wide. "Oh no." She shook her head vehemently.

"Didn't you want the white wedding as a kid Harrison?" He was clearly amused by her strong reaction.

"Hell no! That was always Sadie's thing. I never, never thought about getting married!"

He looked at her in surprise. He had never met a girl that hadn't wanted marriage and the wedding before. "Tommy...Can't we just go to Vegas and..." She said in the low voice she knew got to him.

"No." He said firmly. "I'm not hiding my marriage to you." She understood then. He loved her and this time his marriage mattered, so he would tell the entire world. They got up at the same time and she was in his arms in a heartbeat as their lips met.

__

News!

Sadie was the first one Jude told as they sat in the kitchen of Jude's old home. She wanted her sister to know first so that she could be there for support when she and Tommy told her father. Instead of excitement, Sadie loved weddings, Sadie looked at Jude with concern. Just because Jude was a rock star did not mean she had to live the crazy rock star life. Marriage was supposed to be forever after all.

"Jude are you really ready to marry him? You haven't been back together that long and most of that was on tour. He just got divorced and you're only 19." Jude started mumbling about Tommy's evil scheme and Sadie could only catch every other word.

"He's blackmailing you?! Tommy Q. the most lusted after man in North America is forcing you to marry him?"

"Hey that's my fiancé you're talking about! No using words like lust." Jude found the word fiancé simply slipping out as if it was the most natural thing in the world. She put her head in her hands and groaned. He was evil. He was her addiction, her weakness and her strength all rolled in to one. And he wanted to marry her, to let the world know that she belonged to him.

"I guess that's it then." Sadie shook her head and shot her sister a smile.

__

Old 'Friends'

She showed up again. The bitch actually had the nerve to show up again. Jude watched Cassandra Hayward speak to her fiancé as if she wasn't even in the room. She and Tommy had been working on one of her new songs when they had been interrupted by the overly done brunette, perfect makeup and fake tits hanging out of another low cut dress. Did she own anything else?! Tommy looked nervously between Cassandra and Jude, but Jude chose to ignore him. This woman was plain rude and disrespectful, without even knowing Jude. She must have been one of those women who saw all females as competition. Well Jude would win that fight.

"Excuse me do you mind? We're working." Jude said to Cassandra as the other woman blatantly flirted with Tommy.

"Aww Tommy always has time for an old friend." She gave Tommy a sexy little smile, showing almost too white teeth.

"Actually we're on a deadline." Jude said, in a slightly annoyed voice.

"You better be careful there. I'm sorry Julie was it?"

"Jude." Tommy was quiet knowing better than to speak when Jude had that fire in her eyes.

"Oh sorry _Jude_. As I was saying. Tommy doesn't like his girlfriends too possessive."

"Since when does one screw make you the expert?" Cassandra was stunned into silence as Tommy coughed to hide the laugh he wanted to let out. _That_ was his girl. He had been worried she would have problems with Cassandra again, but apparently not. Jude turned her gaze on him, making his pulse race and he wasn't sure if it was from fear or from lust. "Is that true babe? Do you think I'm too possessive?" He thought about the best way to answer that loaded question and gave her, her look as he spoke.

"As my fiancée I think you could try a little harder actually."

"Good answer." They grinned at each other as Cassandra spoke again.

"Fiancée?"

"Katrina right? We'd love to have you at the wedding." Jude said, dripping sincerity. Cassandra looked flustered for once as she glanced between Tommy and Jude.

"Um I think I have some more forms to sign. See you later."

"Bye..." Jude called to the retreating woman's back.

"Come 'ere." Tommy said. Jude got up, walked over and sat in his lap as he held her. "I love you." She nuzzled his neck and smiled against his skin.

"I love you too."


	38. Chapter 38

_Thank you so much for all your reviews. As I mentioned earlier this story has been completed so I am not taking plot requests. ENJOY!_

**Chapter 38**

__

Out of Control

As soon as G-Major was told of their engagement, things started to balloon out of control. Jude having never thought about her own wedding was at a disadvantage in the face of one crazy publicity planner and one wedding obsessed sister. Her lack of suggestions and opinions for her big day, let E.J. and Sadie steamroll her. Tommy being a guy did not help and none of the women expected him to.

"So who are your bridesmaids going to be?" E.J. asked as she started to write in her planner maniacally. She mumbled something about Casa Loma, a local castle and Jude hoped she had heard wrong.

"Well I want Sadie to be my maid of honor..." Jude looked at her sister quickly, to see what she thought of the idea. She was enveloped in a hug that had her gasping for air. "Sades you can let go now." Sadie backed up and grinned at her.

"Bridesmaids?!" E.J. asked impatiently. She saw the clueless expression on Jude's face and rolled her eyes. "Who are your closest friends?"

"SME?" Jude thought about it. Why not? She could choose who she wanted couldn't she? E.J. ignored her and continued to list things on the page in front of her.

__

Manipulation

Jude came tearing into the apartment one day scaring Tommy with her slamming of the door. She walked over to him on the couch and put her hands on her hips as she glared at him.

"You asked SME to be your ushers?!"

"Yeah...I thought you'd want them to be in the wedding..." Tommy said looking at her confusedly.

"They were my friends first!" Tommy hadn't realized E.J. had been serious when she said Jude had wanted them to be her bridesmaids. He took her arm and pulled her down beside him.

"You were really going to ask them to be your bridesmaids?" Jude shrugged sheepishly. "They're my closest friends..." Tommy shuddered. "What?"

"SME in dresses...."

"I wouldn't have made them wear dresses."

"Babe this is SME we're talking about."

"True...." Jude looked at him. "Why did you ask them though?" Tommy sighed and ran his hand through his gelled hair.

"E.J. said if I couldn't find someone, she'd call Boyz Attack... And she mentioned how much it would mean to you to have SME in our wedding." Jude growled.

"That manipulative little..." Tommy covered her mouth with his hand before she could finish that sentence.

"Remember we have to work with her." Jude nodded and he let go. Jude frowned, not knowing who she was going to ask to be her bridesmaids now.

__

Relocation

Tommy speed dialed a person, he had not spoke to in a few months. Life had been so hectic with him and Jude, it seemed like time just sped away.

"Yo."

"Hey man it's me."

"S'up? How's Jude?"

"She's great. Actually she's part of the reason I'm calling. We're getting married."

"Whoa! Did you knock her up?!"

"No!"

"Just checking....So...That's major...You'll be sober this time right?" Tommy laughed.

"Yeah. I don't want to forget any of it. You interested in being my best man."

"When? I'm kinda in the middle of looking for a job..."

"D fired you?"

"No, but he gave me all the shit assignments, like the Men's Alpine Yodeling Choir." Tommy burst out laughing.

"Tell me that doesn't really exist..."

"Okay maybe not that bad..."

"Is there anything keeping you in Vancouver?" There was a pause as Kwest thought about it.

"Not really...Why?"

"If you agree to be my best man I can get you a gig at G-Major."

"Sounds good. Thanks."

"No need. You helped me get my girl back."

__

One Down

Jude sat at the dining table on her laptop and sent an email off to her high school friend Kat. After Kat had graduated she had moved to New York to study Fashion Design, so the two friends did not see each other as often as they would like.

__

Kat,

Got some incredible news and two favors to ask you. Call me!!!

Love,

Jude

She didn't call because it was morning and she figured Kat would be in one of her design classes. The last time they had seen each other had been during Jude's last tour, when she had stopped in New York, right before Tommy had come back into her life. It had been hard to stay in contact, but every once in a while they managed an email or phone call. Kat had called immediately to yell at Jude when her relationship with Tommy had become public and she had had to find out through the tabloids.

Tommy was sitting on the couch, watching a CSI rerun when her cell phone rang and he absentmindedly picked it up.

"Hello."

"Um yeah she's right here. Hold on." He handed the phone to Jude and gave her a funny look before going back to his show.

"Kat? Are you alright? You sound like you're hyperventilating."

"Wa...Was...that Tommy Q?!"

"Uh yeah...I told you we were living together didn't I?"

"No! All you did was tell me you were dating!" Jude winced at the loud voice on the other end. She held the phone a little ways away from her ear.

"Sorry...It just kind of happened..." Tommy gave a snort from his spot on the couch.

"So what's the big news?!" Kat asked excitedly. She had always been a bit hyper.

"We're getting married." Jude put the phone as far away as she could, until the screaming stopped. Tommy looked at her and she shrugged. "Kat calm down..."

"You're marrying Little Tommy Q?!"

"I wouldn't call him that to his face." She said her tone amused. "Kat I need a couple of favors."

"What?"

"One. I need a bridesmaid. Two. I need a wedding dress." Once again Jude held the phone away from her ear, until her friend had calmed down. "Are you okay now?"

"Yes....I think so..."

"Anyway think you can maybe fly up here in 2 weeks for our engagement party?"

"Of course I can!" The two friends talked some more catching up on each others lives.

"So how's Jamie? I emailed him a few weeks ago, but he hasn't responded."

"Um...I don't really know...We haven't talked in a while." Jude said a little sadly, the change in her voice causing Tommy to look over at her. She explained to Kat about how Jamie had wanted to try for a romantic relationship again and how Tommy had come back into her life right after.

"Wow bad timing for Andrews huh?"

"It was my fault. I should have told him from the beginning that we wouldn't work out..."

"Come on Jude. You and I both know Jamie doesn't listen unless it goes along with his own plans."

"I guess...He won't talk to me about it though and I feel like the longer we go on like this, the less chance we'll be able to fix anything." They continued to talk for a few minutes longer, until Kat said she had to go to class. Tommy watched Jude as she hung up, looking just the tiniest bit sad.

__

For Her

"Jamie." Tommy called to the to him as he reached for his car door. Jamie turned to face him with a closed off expression on his face.

"Little Tommy Q. What can I do for you?" Jamie said as sarcastically as usual as he eyed the former boy-bander. Tommy had to fight not to roll his eyes as he looked at the kid.

"It's about Jude." Tommy said, putting his hands in his jeans pockets. They stood there in the parking lot of Jamie's radio station eyeing each other warily. "You know I asked her to marry me right?" Jamie gave a curt nod. Jamie also knew there were a lot of things that could happen between an engagement and an actual wedding. "Well our engagement party is next week and it would mean a lot to her if you would show up for it."

"Why didn't she ask me herself if she wants me there so much?"

"You haven't exactly been friendly to her ever since we came back from tour Jamie."

Jamie shrugged, reliving the last real conversation he had had with Jude. She didn't need him anymore. Was he bitter about that fact? Nah, not him.

"We've both moved on. I don't think Jude cares if I'm there or not."

"Do you love her?" Tommy asked, making Jamie whip his head back to stare at him.

"Of course I love her. Not that it's any of your business." Jamie said, lacking conviction because he didn't think he should have to justify anything to the person who had taken the woman he loved from him. Tommy studied his face intently and then shook his head.

"I don't think you do." He finally pronounced. Jamie's hands tightened into fists as he glared at Tommy. "You know what? Don't bother coming."

"I love Jude!" Tommy shook his head, as if he pitied the other man.

"When you love someone, really love them, you want them to be happy despite how you might feel. All I see is a kid holding onto his wounded pride."

"What? Is that some fortune cookie wisdom?" Jamie scoffed.

"No. That's what I learned when I thought I lost her for good..." Tommy had learned to appreciate how rare his relationship with Jude was. Maybe it had been his near death experience, or maybe simply losing her, but he would never take her place in his life for granted like Jamie seemed to be. "You know what come, don't come I don't care. But Jude does. Just because she doesn't need your support like she once did, doesn't mean she doesn't value your friendship." Tommy handed him an expensive cream colored envelope and walked back to his blue Viper, leaving Jamie to stare at the thick paper in his hands. He wasn't ready to admit that maybe Tommy Quincy really did love her, maybe more than he himself did.


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter 39**

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Finally He Hears

"Andrews!" Jamie heard a girl's voice call from behind him and he turned to see his old friend standing there in his radio station parking lot. Why did people seem to like meeting him here?

"Katherine Benton. I didn't know you were in town." She reached him quickly and they hugged. As they stepped back from each other, he finally noticed the white eyelet dress she had on.

"So what are you doing in town? And why are you all dressed up?" Kat rolled her eyes.

"Geez Andrews you could at least tell me I look nice before interrogating me."

"Sorry. You do look nice. Very nice. Benton original?" She nodded.

"Don't you know what tonight is?" Jamie shrugged. "The engagement party?"

"Oh....That..."

"You're not going?!"

"Nah...Nana's making pot roast and I got some CD's to go through..." Kat stared at him in open mouthed amazement before she started her rant.

"Get over yourself Andrews! Jude is your oldest friend! How can you blow this off?!"

"I can't support this Kat." He said intensely, causing her to pause for a moment.

"You aren't still in love with her are you?" She asked suspiciously.

"It's got nothing to do with that."

"Then give me one good reason why you would want to hurt Jude like that?"

"Me? Hurt Jude?" He scoffed. "You didn't see how she was when she came back from that first tour. She acted like she was destroyed! He did that to her Kat!" He shook his head. "I can't watch her go through that again."

"Jamie...Didn't she tell you? _She_ left _him_." Jamie looked up at her in shock. "Jude's not a victim. She walked away Jamie. He came back to her on _her_ terms." Kat touched his arm and he looked at her, her expression held compassion, his confusion. "I need a date." She said cajolingly and smiled at him.

"I'm not dressed for a party." He said looking down at his army jacket and jeans.

"Then we better get to your house quick." She grinned hearing his surrender and put her arm through his, dragging his much taller form along with her tiny one.

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THE Party

Sadie found Kwest at the start of the evening. He had come into town the week before and started to unpack in his new apartment. They exchanged greetings and he eyed her with appreciation. She had on a silver halter dress that stopped mid-thigh showing off her long curvy legs.

"Kwest as best man you have one duty tonight. You're babysitting Tommy and Jude."

"Huh?" He said looking at the blond like she had grown two heads.

"If you see them trying to sneak off, stop them."

"Why?"

"They er...have self control issues." Kwest gave a bark of laughter.

"Tell me about it. Who do you think had to drag them out of a dressing room more than once?" Sadie giggled. "I even found them coming out of a men's room once." Sadie started to explain her theory about them and bathrooms after she heard that. They flirted some more until Tommy and Jude arrived.

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The Parents

Victoria Masters walked up to her ex-husband with a glass of champagne in her hand and a grim expression on her face. She and her husband Don had flown in from France yesterday to attend the party.

"Hi Vick. We haven't had a chance to talk tonight. How are you?"

"Great parenting skills Stuart. I leave you with the girls and _this_ is what happens." She said gesturing with her glass, sloshing a little of the golden liquid onto her own hand, at the couple laughing with their friends. "First she's living with him. Now our 19 year old daughter is getting married to that boy!"

"Come on Vicky. Neither of us are exactly in a position to say what will make a marriage work." Stuart said soothingly, his unruffled tone further enraging her.

"You're the one who..."

"I know....What I did was completely wrong. But we were fighting long before I cheated on you. That wasn't exactly healthy for the girls to watch either." Victoria was a bit thrown at how easily he admitted to being in the wrong and changed subjects instead.

"She's too young and naïve. That boy will just use her and hurt her in the end!"

"I don't think..."

"I've read the tabloids Stuart. The kind of life he leads....And he's dragged her right into it!"

"Jude is an adult now. And what is so bad about their life Vick? Jude is living her dream and found someone who loves her. Sure I had reservations about him, but look at them." They both turned their heads back to the couple, he holding her at the waist so naturally, she leaning against his shoulder as they interacted with their friends. They moved together without conscious thought. Stuart had taught both of his girls to be independent and self sufficient. He had seen how well Jude had handled her life before Tommy had come back into it and was satisfied that she could make it on her own if she so chose. But Tommy made her happy. Even Stuart could see that with his protective father's eyes. He turned back to his ex-wife. "A little advice Vicky. Don't take your worries to her. You'll only lose what little relationship you have left with her."

"She has no other skills to fall back on. What happens when the singing stops?" Stuart had to chuckle at that, bringing fire to her eyes. Victoria had never fully supported Jude's career in music, even though she had never openly admitted it.

"Jude's life has always been about music and now she has someone to share it with. They could retire today and live the rest of their lives in comfort. Do you have any idea how much they're both worth now?" Jude had given Stuart her royalties and signing bonus to invest, so he had a fair idea how much money she had. Her first album had sold over a million copies and her second had gone double platinum. "Vicky isn't that what we always wanted for them? Success, happiness and someone to share it with? So what if she's found it all a little earlier than we figured?"

"But does he really love her?"

"When she came back from her second tour he followed her home." Stuart said with some amusement. "You think he would have willingly met me if he wasn't serious about her? I really believe he loves her. Go talk to them. Maybe it will put your mind at ease." She nodded and finished her champagne off, handing Stuart the empty glass, before walking towards Jude and Tommy. Stuart shook his head as he watched her go. If she was smart she would take his advice, because he knew Jude would fight anyone who dared badmouth Tommy or their relationship. She had always been the stubborn one in the family and loyal to a fault.

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The Predictable

Tommy and Jude had finally managed to find a corner to themselves, after being bombarded by family and friends. Jamie had shown up with Kat surprising Jude and the old friends had spoken for a little while leaving Jude with a lighter heart. Then he had met Jude's mother who had been rather standoffish until he had used his famous Quincy charm on her and she had relaxed as they spoke about Paris. They had not spent any time alone together all day, Jude having had her final fitting for her dress at G-Major and Tommy getting ready at their apartment. When they had met in the lobby of the hotel he had stared at the beautiful vision in front of him stunned. She wore a rose colored silk gown that was skin tight, until mid-thigh where it flared out to her ankles in a sexy little flounce. It had a sweetheart neckline, held up by two spaghetti straps. Her long curls were swept back by two vintage rhinestone combs showing off the graceful curve of her neck. Chandelier earrings brushed against her cheeks seductively. Before he could properly greet her, they were both swept up by Sadie and forced to join the party.

Tommy kissed the spot behind her ear that he had wanted to since he had seen her tonight, his hand skimmed from her hip down her thigh where it stopped mid motion and moved up again, feeling something marring her smooth flesh.

"You're wearing a garter belt?" He said in a low rasp.

"Yeah so?" She said playfully.

"I've never seen you in a garter belt before. What color is it?" Her eyes met his, which had darkened with a familiar heat.

"You'll have to find out on your own." He took her hand and scanned for the nearest exit. Jude laughed not cooperating as he tried to pull her along.

"Tommy! We can't leave our own engagement party!" He turned and pulled her close, his lips going to the sensitive skin of her neck.

"I'll make it worth your while." He whispered against her ear, causing little ripples of desire to run through her as his teeth nipped at her ear lobe, above her earring. She did not protest again as he tried to surreptitiously walk them towards the nearest door. Before they could slip out unnoticed a sexy blond barred their path. She pointed at Tommy.

"You get away from her until you cool down." She said authoritatively.

"Sadie... He was just walking me to the restroom." Jude whined. Sadie looked at her with disbelieving eyes and then swung them back at Tommy until he reluctantly let go of Jude's hand.

"Dinner is in 15 minutes. Stay away from each other until then." Tommy walked away from them to find Kwest.

"Did you really have to do that?" Jude hissed at her sister.

"Oh please. I've heard enough of your stories to know what you were running off to do. E.J. and I worked hard to pull this party off so quickly. " Jude turned a shade of pink to match her dress. " I thought so. Come on." Sadie linked her arm through Jude's and walked them towards the guests.

They sat next to each other, closer than the seating required at one of the round tables that dotted the ball room. Jude leaned over and whisper in Tommy's ear.

"I took off the garter belt." He looked at her like a little boy who had lost his favorite toy, almost pouting. She leaned in again and whispered straight into his ear, hot breath tickling the fine hairs of his skin. "And everything else..." He gulped visibly and felt blood flowing south. He scooted his chair further underneath the table, causing her to laugh lightly.

"You are evil..." He said just as softly into her ear as his hand caressed her upper thigh, causing her breath to catch.

"What bad things did you do to deserve me?" They barely noticed the other couples sitting with them so engrossed in their own little world.

"I will do anything to deserve you." He tested her earlier statement with his fingers, feeling for any telltale seams or ripples through her silky dress. Feeling none he grinned as his hand traveled further into forbidden territory. Her hand finally stopped him as she gazed at him with equal parts lust and admonishment. They were interrupted by the serving of the first course. Tommy sighed. This was going to be a long night.

So what if the apartment was only 15 minutes away. They couldn't wait that long. As Tommy fumbled the hotel door open, Jude pushed him inside her hands. already undoing his tie. He shrugged off his jacket and she kicked off her heels as the door shut behind them. He pressed her against the wall, their mouths meeting in a bruising kiss full of hunger and need. His hands slid under dress as her hands went to the button of his slacks She unzipped him and pushed his boxers down, freeing his arousal. He teased her wet cleft with his fingers, causing her to moan as she threw her head back against the wall. He thrust two fingers in causing her to raise her hips to meet his digits.

"I need you inside...me..." She gasped. He took his fingers out of her heat and licked them drawing her eyes to the erotic movement. He lifted her up and pressed her against the wall as he positioned his hardness at her entrance. With one stroke he buried himself inside her, taking her cries into his mouth as he started to thrust inside her. Her legs wrapped around him and he placed one hand against the wall bracing himself as he rammed into her.

"Tommy...Fuck me!" She cried out, when his mouth left hers to take in much needed air. He pushed in and put of her relentlessly until he felt her inner muscles start to quiver, signaling her impending release. He slid down the strap of her gown and took her nipple into his mouth, biting down as he thrust that much harder. She screamed his name as she slid over the edge, pain and pleasure rolling into one throbbing ball of need. He shoved against her contracting flesh, the pressure building, needing release. Her mouth found his throat as she bit down, causing his rhythm to falter. Her wicked tongue soothed the pain, bringing the orgasm rushing through him. He thrust into her a few more times before collapsing with her in his arms to the floor. His head pillowed against her chest.

"I think my dress is ruined..." She said a little sadly.

"I'll buy you as many as you want if you let me ruin them the same way." She laughed then.

"We could just try it naked you know? Or with the garter and hose you never saw." his cock stiffened to attention, brushing against her leg and she looked at him in surprise. "Already?" He grinned.

"I will do anything you want to you if you put those on."

"Deal." She reached for her purse on the floor and wiggled away from him, going to the bathroom before he could catch her, not that he tried. He got up slowly and undressed, making his way to the king sized bed to wait for his fiancée.

_Publicity and Diamonds_

Jude sat down in E.J.'s office, having been summoned by the other woman. She waited expectantly as she could tell E.J. was bursting with news.

"Movado wants both of you to represent their new collection, Timeless. They want to base it around your engagement ring. They're willing to pay for part of your wedding too if they can have a presence there."

"What's the big deal? I know it's beautiful, but lots of people have diamonds."

"Do you know how rare blue diamonds are? Especially one that size?!" E.J. looked at Jude, like she was clueless. Jude stared down at her finger. She loved the ring, not because of how it looked, although he had known her tastes exactly, it was because he had given it to her.

"How...How much do you think it cost him?" E.J. raised her eyebrow at Jude.

"Probably more than I make in 10 years." Jude looked at the stone in shock. Why would he?!

"So what do you think about Movado? It's big Jude. They don't usually bother with spokespersons."

"Let me talk to Tommy..." Jude was already overwhelmed and they had barely started the wedding plans. A half a million dollar ring and representing a luxury watch line? Where had the sanity in her world gone?!


	40. Chapter 40

_Only 3 more chapters after this one. Thanks everyone for coming on the ride. ENJOY! I have 13 chapters written for another story I've been working on. When you review please tell me if you are interested in me posting it here. Like all my stories it is already on DLS. This new story follows IS a little more closely, but with a slight twist. What if the first time Jude and Tommy meet isn't at G-Major?_

**Chapter 40**

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Girl Time

The next night Kat and Jude decided to have a sleepover at Jude's family home to catch up and so that Kat could start getting ideas for Jude's dress. They were both dressed in pajamas, the first time Jude had actually worn them since she and Tommy had gotten back together, and had tons of junk food scattered around the floor of Jude's room. Kat had gotten Jude's measurements and promised to email some preliminary sketches. Now they could concentrate on the really important things. Like men. Kat took a big spoonful of chocolate chip ice cream before staring at her old friend.

"What?" Jude asked under Kat's intense scrutiny.

"You live in a kick ass apartment with the hottest guy I have ever seen. And you're getting married to him. You're famous at 19! Wow Jude...It seems so surreal. I'm still in school."

"Trust me Kat, sometimes I think this is just some crazy dream and I'll wake up and still be the geek in high school." They both could laugh about it now, but at the time high school had not always been the best time of their lives.

"Do you feel like a grownup?"

"No....I feel like I left normal 5 exits ago. I dunno if rock stars ever grow up." Jude sighed and took a spoonful of Cherry Garcia. "Kat am I completely crazy for doing this?" She asked seriously.

"How much do you love him?"

"There's no choice. He's it for me."

"Then no, you're not crazy, just too damn lucky. I'm so jealous." Jude looked concerned for a moment. "Don't worry..." Kat reassured her. "We're not in high school fighting over Jamie. What were we thinking back then?" Kat rolled her eyes and they both laughed. "If you could bottle the look that Tommy gives you, every girl out there would be creaming in her pants." Jude looked at her in shock unable to believe she had said that.

"That is nasty Kat!" Jude finally burst out. Did Tommy really look at her like that when she wasn't aware?

"You have to admit it's true though. He doesn't _see_ anyone but you, when you're in a room." Jude gave a small grin.

"It's not just sex Kat." She said, wanting to make sure her friend understood. He was everything in her life, filling spaces that she had not known she needed filled or that she even knew she had.

"I know. That's what makes you so damn lucky. I mean...not that it's easy to find a guy that's actually good at sex either..." They got sillier as the night progressed, Jude feeling more relaxed than she had in a longtime since this wedding had been publicized.

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Lace, Satin and Bows

Tommy and Jude entered G-Major one morning to a whirlwind of activity, EJ. At its center. There were interns carrying large garment boxes and bags into the conference room. She looked up from her clipboard to see the both of them and frowned. She pointed at Tommy.

"You can't be here. Get out." Tommy and Jude exchanged looks, neither of them having a clue what was going on. They had planned on finally getting more of her album done, haven already fallen behind by working on his and then with his promotion of it. They had already done three interviews together, everyone so interested in their engagement and he had done two alone. Soon Tommy would have to do his tour and Jude had refused to be left behind.

"Uh...What's going on?" Jude asked tentatively, her eyes following the intern with shoe boxes walking away.

"Honestly! I gave you a schedule! Didn't you even look at it?" E.J. had handed Jude a thick folder a couple of days ago and Jude had been afraid to open it. "You're choosing a wedding gown today! And he _can'_t see it!" Jude turned to Tommy who looked a little panic stricken as she pleaded into his eyes.

"Uh just call me when you need me to pick you up." He said as he started to back out of her reach.

"Hey!" Jude yelled as Tommy slipped away from them. She would have gone after him, if she hadn't been afraid E.J. would have tackled her to the ground. Jude turned back to the other woman, who had an impatient look on her face. "E.J. I already have a gown..."

"Really?!" Her dark eyes brightened. "Who's the designer? Dior? Wang?"

"My friend Kat. You met her at the engagement party? She's designing it for me." E.J. started shaking her head, her dark glossy hair swinging back and forth.

"No way! You are going to have a designer dress. This wedding is already being called the event of the year. You can't get away with some no name designer. No offense to your friend." With that E.J. grabbed Jude's arm and manhandled her into the other room where Sadie sat waiting. Jude's mind was still reeling over 'the event of the year' comment.

5 hours and what seemed like hundreds of dresses later they found the perfect one. At least Sadie and E.J. had. Jude hadn't heard her own voice after the first 10 she had tried on. She stood in front of the full length mirror they had had brought in staring at her own reflection. The dress was by some designer named Monique Lhuillier that Sadie said had done a ton of celebrities. It had a strapless cream colored lace bodice and a full skirt that led to a 10 foot train. Jude felt engulfed by the material and wondered how she would be able to walk in it. She was not the most coordinated person at the best of times.

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My Lover is Away

Jude went on tour with Tommy to protestations by E.J. who said she needed Jude there to go over all the wedding details. The woman called at least 5 times a day to ask Jude one question or another. This went on for a month before Jude had finally given in, leaving Tommy to finish his tour on his own. She flew back before they could celebrate her 20th birthday together and both of them had been upset about it. Jude tried to keep most of her stress hidden from Tommy, knowing he would feel bad if he knew how hard this wedding thing was becoming for her. Hearing his voice every night on the phone made Jude want to run away and join him again, but she knew that it wasn't possible. She managed to sneak away to join him only a handful of times on her rare free weekends. At least this way she would be able to work on her album, or so she thought.

Tommy began his concert by speaking to the crowd as he did at every concert since Jude left. He found it dissuaded all but the most die hard girls to leave him alone. Of course a few of the tenacious ones always found a way to his hotel room, where he not so politely slammed the door in their faces.

"I'd like to dedicate this concert to Jude, my lover, my muse and my best friend. I miss you girl." The girls found it romantic and the guys thought he was whipped, not that he cared. He missed Jude and hated that they had to be apart. It was something he had promised himself he would never let happen again, but somehow it had.

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Sugar, Flowers and Icing

Okay cake tasting. That should have been the easiest thing to accomplish on E.J.'s insanely long list. It couldn't take that long could it? That was one thing Jude had to be good at right? Choosing the wedding cake should have been easy, even for Jude. She loved cake, what girl didn't?

Sadie, E.J. and Jude sat at an intimate little shop drinking tea as sample after sample was brought out. Who ever heard of mango coulis on a cake before?

"What do you think of this one Jude?" E.J. asked as she handed Jude a slice of dark chocolate cake with red frosting. Jude never thought she would be sick of eating desert, but found she was almost at that point. She took a tiny piece and put it in her mouth, not really noticing much difference from this one to the other chocolate ones she had already tried.

"Um...it's good."

"It's too plain." Sadie said and E.J. nodded agreeing.

"You know with so many guests they're going to need more than one cake?" Sadie said. Sadie and E.J. had narrowed it down to 5 choices, but couldn't seem to decide which they wanted. Jude had not been helpful, having liked all of them except the one with coconut frosting which she knew Tommy did not care for. Jude thought she was going to throw up if she had to put any more sugary sweet frosting in her mouth. " I know!" Sadie said as if she had come up with a brilliant plan. "We need 4 cakes right?" E.J. took a calculator out of her handbag and did the math.

"Yep."

"So why don't we get all different ones and set them up at tables almost like sculptures? They could all be linked by that fresh flower idea we talked about?" They wanted fresh flowers on the cakes to match the garden theme since they planned on having the wedding and reception at Toronto's own castle, Casa Loma's extensive gardens.

"Great idea!" E.J. said enthusiastically as she scribbled something else in her planner. Jude could only stare at them in shock 4 multi-tiered wedding cakes? How many people were coming? Jude and Tommy had only decided on about 50 people, including ones her parents had wanted to invite.

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In Hiding

Kwest walked into the storage closet one morning to get some blank CD's when he realized he wasn't alone. Jude sat on one of the beat up spare chairs with her journal clasped in her hands. He gave her a funny look and she put her index finger to her mouth, pointing at the still open door with her other hand. He turned and shut it before looking at her again.

"E.J.'s been chasing me around all week. I haven't had a chance to work on my music at all. This wedding thing is completely out of control." She sighed and rotated her tense shoulders.

"If you don't want a big wedding, why don't you tell them?" He said as if it should have been the easiest thing in the world causing Jude to roll her eyes.

"It's what Tommy wants..."

"Tommy? Former Boyz Attacker Little Tommy Q?"

"Oooh I'm going to tell him you said that..."

"No! Jude I was just kidding...You can't tell him. He'll kick my ass." Jude laughed for what felt like the first time in weeks. "So why is Tommy so gung ho on a big wedding?" It sounded completely out of character for his friend. Tommy liked to keep his real personal life pretty private.

"He doesn't want to hide 'us', like he did with Portia." Kwest stared at her in amazement. Of course he had known Tommy loved Jude, but he hadn't realized how much until this moment.

"Oh..."

"So how do you say no to something like that?" The answer was of course 'you didn't.'

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Taste of Victory

He watched his girl on the screen as she accepted yet another award, this time for best female artist at the People's Picks. She was beautiful in a blue dress that matched her eyes and clung to her slender form. And all he could think was that he should have been the one who escorted her, not Spied. The next category was best rock song and he had been nominated for I Don't Care, not that he thought he had a chance. He blinked as he heard his name called and she was back on stage again, her smile brighter than it had been any of the previous times. He saw the words 'I love you' shaped on her lips and said it back to the screen. The tour would be over in 3 weeks and he would never let her go again once the wedding was over. As the show wound down the room phone rang.

"Hey baby. You were amazing." He lay back on the pillows and got comfortable as he listened to her excited voice. It would all be worth it in the end, when he could slip the ring onto her finger.


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter 41**

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The Return

Their reunion should have been beautiful and so sweet; two lovers finally back together after too much time apart. Instead their presence almost caused a riot at the airport where she waited for him to land. Alone with her hair tucked under a baseball cap, a sweatshirt and ripped jeans, she looked like any average girl, not drawing much attention. That lasted only until he came out of the terminal and his searching eyes found her. Once he made his way into her arms, pulling the hat off her head, letting her golden curls loose and pulled her in for a kiss they drew attention. The kiss itself was noteworthy in its passionate intensity and once people looked their way, the rest as they said was history. Even they, always so focused on each other could not drown out the buzzing noise of the people around them as they realized who the young couple were. Airport security had to be called and they had to be escorted to baggage claim and then to her car. The next day photos snapped on phones would be sold to the tabloids.

"Jude...?"

"Hmm.." She turned her head up to look at him, from the shelter of his arms. They had made it home in once piece although at one point it appeared that cars had been following them.

"How come you never asked me if I was with anyone else on tour?" He still remembered the early days of his relationship with Portia when she was constantly questioning his every action. Of course he had done plenty of things back then to make her mistrust him.

"Because you love me." She said simply as if there was no question, as if there weren't hundreds of beautiful girls throwing themselves at his feet every night. He appreciated the women, but had only felt burning hunger for one. The belief in him, so clear in her big blue eyes, floored him. "Besides if you were satisfying yourself with the groupies I figured we wouldn't have had all that phone sex." He laughed and tickled her ribs making her squirm against him.

"God I missed you so much." He said as he looked into her eyes and cupped her cheek with his hand. "Marry me."

"I can't. You see..." She whispered against his lips. "This man is blackmailing me and I promised I'd marry him."

"What secrets does he have on you Harrison?" He said playfully, turning his head to nip at her ear lobe.

"He's the only one who knows my weaknesses."

"Really..." His hand found one of her weaknesses bringing a moan to her lips.

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The Fight

They arrived back at the apartment in the early afternoon from G-Major which was highly unusual for them. Usually when they had the chance they spent all day and sometimes all night working on their music. Today however, Tommy was starting to find out how disrupted Jude's life at G-Major had become. She would not even look at him as she took off her jean jacket and yanked open the closet door to fling it carelessly into the dark recesses, before slamming it shut.

She had been giving him the silent treatment, ever since he had made an offhand comment about her slacking on her music, while he had been on tour. He hadn't really meant it, but it had puzzled him why she had so few new songs written and had only produced 2 for her record while he'd been gone. After she had started yelling at him, and he still wasn't sure what she had been talking about, something about 5 cakes and celebrities she's never met, he'd overreacted and started yelling back. Then the yelling became a glaring contest, until Georgia finally came in and kicked them both out, saying they were distracting everyone at the studio.

"Jude..." She ignored him as she headed for the spare bedroom they had made into a music room. He followed her, but she already had headphones in her ears and her electric guitar in her hand. She was attacking the strings almost violently and he knew her hands would feel it in the morning. He sighed and turned around, leaving her alone.

Tommy sat down on the couch with his head in his hands. It wasn't supposed to be like this. He had come back from the tour just two days ago. He and Jude should have been making love, not fighting. It was true she seemed a little tenser than usual and she had shadows under her eyes, but he had assumed that was because she did not sleep well without him as he didn't without her. It wasn't that this was the first time they had gotten into a fight, they were both passionate people after all. It was the fact that Jude was holding something back this time and he couldn't figure out what it was.

Later that night Tommy lay in bed in the dark with the television remote in his hands, flipping through random channels. She had not surfaced from the music room, even to eat and he had finally gone to bed alone. He hoped he had made the right choice by giving her time to cool off, instead of pushing the issue. He heard the creak of the door and looked away from the screen to see her standing in the doorway. She stripped down to her panties and t-shirt as she walked towards the bed. Jude pulled up the covers and slid underneath them into his arms. She put her head on his chest as he held her close, kissing the top of her head.

"I'm sorry..." She whispered so softly he barely made it out.

"What's going on Jude?" He asked with concern, but she simply shook her head and he let the matter drop for the time being. Her tongue darted out to taste his nipple and he fisted his hands in her hair. He let her distract him tonight, but he would not forget that she was keeping something from him for long.

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This Is Pampering?

What was it with people having the urge to wrap her up like a sardine? Was all Jude could think as the masseuse continued to tighten the oversized towel wrapped around Jude's naked body. Sadie and E.J. had booked them all into a luxurious spa three days before the wedding so she could get the works done to her. Jude had not liked the sound of it and had been a little insulted that they said she really needed that facial. She was only 20 years old! She wondered why anyone would ever think it would be a good idea to put mud on her face. Jude could barely breathe, between not wanting to inhale any gunk into her nose and the evil woman who was continually tightening the cloth around her. The salt paste the woman had spread onto her skin, before the mummification process was not remotely comfortable and she wished badly that she could just jump into the large Jacuzzi in the common room, but no she was stuck here until they said she was done.

Sadie gave a small moan of pleasure on the table next to Jude as hot stones were placed on top of her. Jude just closed her eyes and tried to go to her happy music place. She had to tell herself countless times that day that it would be over soon.

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This Is What It's Become?

Jude sat on her bed in old room and stared at the map in front of her. It was of the grounds of Casa Loma where their wedding would be held the next day. There was the part of the garden where they would be married, the spot where the stage would be set up with the movies screen on it, the outdoor reception area and then there was the...press tent?! She blinked and looked again, not believing E.J. had invited the press, when she had promised it would only be E! news following them around. Not that that wasn't bad enough. She looked inside the small shopping bad sitting next to her and rolled her eyes. Who had swag bags at a wedding?! As her thoughts raced, she knew she couldn't do it. She stood up quickly and grabbed the bag absentmindedly as she snuck out of her room and down the stairs. Sadie would be looking for her soon to bring her to the bachelorette party and she had to make sure her sister didn't catch her. She thought she could handle the wedding, but as the hours started to tick away, she knew in her heart it was wrong. She had to go to the apartment and tell Tommy, even though the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him.

_Tommy opened the door to investigate, having heard Jude fiddling with the key, unable to even work the lock she was so agitated. _

"Jude...?" She walked in with a small glossy cream colored shopping bag in her hand. He shut the door and turned to her. Her troubled eyes met his questioning ones as she looked up. "Aren't you supposed to..."

"Tommy I can't do this..." She interrupted, with words that tore out his guts.


	42. Chapter 42

_Well it's almost over! One more chapters and I can close this document on my comp. Hope you have enjoyed the ride. Thanks for everyone who has given me feedback._

**Chapter 42**

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The Breakdown

"You're calling it off?" He said through lips gone numb. Sure she had seemed stressed these last few months and they hadn't been able to spend as much time together, but they had still been Tommy and Jude or so he had thought. Here he was watching the love of his life break his heart with more words. But as he fought to concentrate, he realized she wasn't and his relief was instant.

"No!" Her head shot up to look at him. "Tommy there are going to be swans at the wedding! Swans! And a champagne pyramid and E! News has an exclusive.... Cameras are going to be following us around! There are 400 guests! I don't even know 100 people." He let her continue to rant until she got it all out of her system. "We're getting married at a flipping castle! What am I a princess? And there's a press tent..." She picked up the bag she had brought with her and threw it towards Tommy. "We have a swag bag for our wedding! What is it a Hollywood premier?!" He looked inside curious as she watched. He started to take items out and she could tell he was a little stunned himself. He took out a Tiffany's silver frame with their engagement photo in it, both of their CDs, some gift cards, designer sunglasses and his personal favorite a small sterling silver hourglass with blue Swarovski crystals in it to match Jude's engagement ring, courtesy of Movado to launch their Timeless collection. They had done shot the television ad and magazine promotions right before Tommy's tour.

"The men get the keychain and the women the pendant." She said, nodding at the hourglass still in his hand.

"Okay I hate to say this, but this is some pretty sweet swag."

"I know." She gave a small laugh that still sounded strained to him. He put the stuff down and turned back to her.

"Jude..." His eyes softened and he took her cold hands in his. "You never wanted this did you? You tried to tell me that at the beginning, but I didn't listen..." She interrupted as his touch centered her.

"I know you just didn't want to hide this away like your first marriage Tommy. Don't worry. I'll be okay. I just needed to freak out for a second..."

"Jude look at me." She did and he could see the strain and unhappiness that he had missed before. "We don't have to get married. I want you to be happy."

"No Tommy. I _want_ to marry you. Forever remember? It's just..." He took her face in his hands and looked into her lost eyes.

"You don't get what swans and champagne pyramids and media have to do with getting married..." She nodded. He dropped his arms and reached for her hand to pull her to her feet. "Come on."

"What..."

"Get your passport. We're leaving."

"What?! We can't leave." He put his fingers to her lips.

"I was wrong. This should only have been about us from the beginning. I was too busy trying to show the world that you were mine instead of showing you that I love you."

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Runaway

"Jude it's almost time to go. The girls are waiting for us." There was no response so she opened the door. Sadie walked into her sister's old bedroom expecting to find her getting ready for the bachelorette party, but it was empty. Sadie went into her own bedroom next to stare out the window to see if Jude's Mustang was still there, but it was gone too. She tried Jude's cell phone, but it went straight to voicemail. Dammit where could she have gone? Was she running away? And could she even do that to Tommy? She loved him so much.

Sadie headed for their apartment, sure her sister had gone there, probably missing Tommy. She ran into Kwest in the lobby, who was supposed to pick Tommy up for the bachelor party.

"Hey Sadie. Aren't you supposed to be at your party?"

"Have you talked to Tommy?"

"Not since last night...Why?"

"Jude left without telling me...It's probably nothing. She probably just wanted to see Tommy..." Sadie had a sinking feeling in her stomach, not truly believing her own words. They took the elevator up and knocked on the door. Of course there was no answer and Sadie whipped out her cell phone once more to try and reach her sister.

"What do you think happened to them?" Kwest asked as Sadie held up a finger.

"Hello?"

"Jude! Where the hell are you?!" There was a brief silence and Sadie could hear the unmistakable sound of a boarding call in the background. "You're at the airport?!"

"What?!" Kwest asked, hoping Tommy was with her, otherwise his friend would probably self destruct. "Is Tommy with her?!" Sadie relayed the question.

"Yeah Sades Tommy's here...." Sadie nodded at Kwest who breathed a sigh of relief. "We just couldn't do it... Sadie I'm sorry..."

"Don't you dare go anywhere before I get there!" Sadie commanded and hung up on her sister. She grabbed Kwest's hand, and dragged him to the elevator.

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Departure

By the time Sadie and Kwest got to their terminal, the boarding process had already started. Tommy and Jude had not even known how lucky they were, that his former band mates had arrived just an hour before to attend their wedding. They had taken back to the hotel with them, the paparazzi that had been waiting around the airport like vultures for the various celebrity guests that were supposed to arrive for their wedding tomorrow.

Kwest panted breathlessly as Sadie hurried them towards the terminal. Damn that girl could run and in heels no less. They spotted the couple standing by the desk, Tommy with two garment bags slung over his arm and Jude leaning against him glancing nervously at the clock. Passengers filed past them into the terminal leading to their flight. They turned as Sadie hurried towards them dragging Kwest along.

"What do you think you're doing?!" Sadie demanded as she stopped abruptly causing Kwest to bump into her. She gave him a glare before turning her attention back to the couple in front of them.

"Sadie..." Tommy tried to explain, but Sadie started in on Jude again.

"You have 400 guests arriving tomorrow for your wedding. You can't just run away!"

"Sadie stop." Tommy said more forcefully. "You know Jude. She doesn't want this. She never did." Sadie turned her eyes to Jude.

"Then why didn't you say something before this? We spent all this time..."

"She did it for me Sadie."

"Tommy maybe we should just..." Jude said hesitantly and he shook his head.

"What do _you_ want?" Their eyes locked in a gaze so intense it had Sadie looking away and Kwest clearing his throat.

"Elvis?" Jude said with a small smile on her face. He grinned back at her and then they turned back to Sadie who sighed.

"You're really doing this?" They nodded and the final boarding call came over the intercom.

"Sadie could you make sure no one says anything until tomorrow? Otherwise the press..." Tommy asked his soon to be sister in law. She nodded.

"I'll take care of it." As the couple turned to go Sadie spoke to their backs.

"Great. What are we supposed to tell all the guests?" Tommy turned and grinned at her.

"Tell them to have a kick ass party on us." He took his wallet out of the back pocket and removed a platinum Visa card. He handed it to Sadie.

"Have fun at the bachelorette party." Sadie shook her head, but could not hide the smile. At least one of the rumors about him was true. Tommy Quincy was smooth.

"You realize E.J. is going to kill us when she finds out?" Jude said to Tommy as they stepped onto the plane.

Kwest and Sadie watched as the door closed behind them; the last people to board the plane.

"So what are we going to do now?" Kwest asked her.

"Have a great night on Tommy before the shit hits the fan." Sadie held the credit card up between two manicured fingers.

"Sounds good." Kwest called Spied and had him bring the guys to the restaurant the girls were supposed to start off at that night. They swore everyone to secrecy and proceeded to spend Tommy's money happily. Sadie figured he owed her that much after all the work she had put in to the biggest non-wedding of the year.

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Supervision

"Tommy Quincy?! Weren't you supposed to get married tomorrow?" A curvy red head asked Tommy as she sat down in Jude's seat. " I knew you couldn't do it...You couldn't deprive yourself of all the world has to offer." She said 'offer' rather suggestively. "I'm Stazia." She held out a perfectly manicured hand, that he took half-heartedly.

Jude walked back down the aisle from the restroom, seeing the woman in her seat speaking to Tommy. She shook her head and made her way back to him. He just couldn't stay out of trouble could he?

"Excuse me. You're in my seat." Jude said with clear amusement in her voice after she had just heard how Tommy could do so much better. Tommy looked like he was about to yell at the woman, so this red head was actually lucky Jude had come back when she did. The other woman whipped her head up in shock.

"Jude Harrison!"

"What? Did you expect he was running away? Well I guess he is... with me..." Jude gave her a very evil un-Jude like grin. The other woman practically scrambled out of the seat and left them, her cheeks flaming. Maybe she was a natural red head after all. "Switch seats with me." She did not want to sit anywhere that woman's ass had warmed. Tommy gave her a look, but did not comment as he got up and sat in the aisle seat, forcing Jude to slide past him to get into his former seat. His hand took advantage by splaying his fingers on her lower back, the tips sliding below the waistband of her jeans to touch a little bare flesh. Jude turned and frowned at him, causing him to drop his arm as she got comfortable in the plush seat.

"I can't leave you alone for two minutes..." He shook his head.

"That's why I'm marrying you. So you can protect me from them." Jude grinned at him.

"Is that so?" Their faces grew closer, his breath fanning her cheek. "It sounds like a big job....What do I get out of it?"

"Unlimited sex?"

"I'm a girl. I can get that anywhere." His hands circle her tiny waist as he drew her close.

"Me. Forever?"

"Hmm..." She pretended to contemplate.

"Isn't that enough?" He raised his eyebrow at her. She wrapped her arms around his neck.

"That babe, is everything." And her lips were on his drinking him in.

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Mile High

Since it was a night time flight the cabin lights had all been dimmed and blankets and pillows provided for the passengers. Jude dozed on Tommy's shoulder, but Tommy was bored so he started to kiss Jude's neck. She murmured a light protest as he bit her ear lobe. His fingers wandered to the snap of her jeans underneath their shared blanket finally waking her up.

"Tommy!" She hissed softly. "There are people everywhere!" He ignored her protests and proceeded to slide his fingers into her panties causing a sharp breath to escape her. He parted the folds of her lips and slid his calloused index finger along her most sensitive nub. She bit her lip to stifle the cry that wanted to escape. As he teased her she started to press against his wandering hand. She decided he deserved a little tormenting of his own and her hand found his semi-erect arousal. She unzipped him and pulled him free of his boxers. Her hand wrapped around his now completely hard shaft and she started to work up and down its length.

They saw movement coming up the aisle and froze as the stewardess passed by, barely sparing them a glance. All Jude could hear was the sound of their combined ragged breathing. She took Tommy's wrist and moved his hand back onto his own lap. She zipped and buttoned her jeans back up and stood surprising him. Her look was one of promise as she brushed his legs heading into the aisle. He watched as she entered the lavatory. Tommy tucked himself back into his pants and waited a minute to make sure no one was awake to notice him.

He opened the door and quickly ducked inside. The room was so small they were pressed chest to chest. She reached up and pressed her mouth against his tongues tangling in a kiss filled with wild abandon. Somehow she managed to maneuver them so that his back faced the toilet. She pushed him down onto the lid and her hands went to the snap of her jeans. He got the hint and pulled his own pants down. With her back facing him she lowered herself onto his hardness causing him to moan as she sank down, taking all of him into her wet body. He wrapped one arm around her stomach and let her set the pace as she pressed against him. His other hand went to the front of her body, spreading her nether lips so his fingers could stroke her clit as she rode him.

They had perfected the art of sex in confined spaces and found the challenge almost enjoyable. Jude giggled, making Tommy look at her, his pride slightly wounded.

"What?" He asked as he pushed all the way into her, making breath escape her lips. "That makes you laugh?"

"No..." She could barely speak as he started pumping in and out of her, grazing her clit with his finger on every thrust. "Sadie thinks we have an obsession with bathrooms." She gasped out as she felt the pressure building so sweetly in her body. She pushed down on him as he thrust up her bottom slapping against his hard thighs. Her hands reached out and braced against the confining walls as she moved against him. His fingers sent her over the edge as he continued to pump into her. She reached down and grabbed his balls, squeezing him gently as he bit her shoulder to muffle his own cry of pleasure. He thrust into her a few more times before collapsing back against the wall. She leaned against him for a few more minutes, until she was convinced she could walk again.

"Do we have a thing for bathrooms?" Tommy asked.

"They work for me..." She turned her head and grinned at him.


	43. Chapter 43

_So here's the last chapter. As of right now I have no immediate plans to make a sequel. I usually start a story when I come up with an idea and I can't think of more for this Tommy and Jude at this time. **Big thanks** to everyone who took the time to review. I will probably start posting my new story soon, although I may change my mind about that. Tell me what you think about this chapter and whether you would like to see my next story on here. Otherwise I don't plan on posting on here any longer. Anyway thanks again for coming on this wild ride with me. I never planned on this getting quite this long. I had planned on ending it when they got back together, but they seemed to have more to say ;) ENJOY!_

**Chapter 43**

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Hello Stranger

The next morning Sadie awoke slowly, mouth dry, head pounding. She felt movement on the bed next to her and turned to stare at a deeply tanned muscular arm. Her eyes traveled up that arm to see his ripped chest. Who knew Kwest was hiding all this underneath his clothes.

"Hey." He said as he studied her face.

"How did we wind up here?" She asked, last night still not clear in her mind. "Did we...?" She looked down at her own naked chest and pulled the sheet up quickly.

"I think so...."

"Oh..." She tried to remember, but that just made her head ache more. Kwest knew she was uncomfortable and reached for his shirt and boxers at the side of the bed, slipping them on underneath the sheets. He got up and went to his dresser to get her a shirt and some shorts. She took them gratefully.

"I'll go make some coffee." She nodded and he left the room shutting the door behind him. She waited a minute to make sure he wasn't coming back in and slipped out of bed, wrapping the sheet around her bare body. She took the clothes he had handed her and left the bedroom to look for the bathroom.

When Sadie emerged, her hair damp, Kwest had something on the stove and food already prepared on the counter. She raised her eyebrows in surprise. Although there were still moving boxes stacked against the wall of the apartment, it was obvious he had unpacked the kitchen first. And apparently he could cook. As she sat down he poured her some coffee and placed some orange juice in front of her. He had a kitchen towel slung over his shoulder and French toast in a skillet. When he finished what he was doing he placed a plate in front of her and one for himself down across from her. He sat down and finally looked at her. She nibbled on a piece of bacon hoping her stomach would not revolt. He watched the beautiful woman in front of him, afraid to scare her away. When she finally looked up to meet his gaze he spoke.

"Sadie I want you to know I'm really not the kind of guy who gets a girl drunk and takes advantage of her. Let me prove it to you."

"How are you going to do that?" She took a bite of his scrambled eggs, mmm delish.

"Can we start over? Let me take you out sometime."

"One condition." She said finally getting her bearings back with food in her belly. He was a good cook. She took a sip of orange juice and had a glint in her eye he wasn't sure he should trust, but relief that she was giving him a chance overshadowed that.

"Name it."

"Have you met E.J.?" He looked a little confused, but went with it.

"We were introduced, but she's been so busy with the wedding I haven't seen much of her."

"I'll go out on a date with you if you tell her about Tommy and Jude eloping." Sadie felt a little bad, but it was better than her having to tell the scary assistant.

"Is that it? Done." Kwest had absolutely no idea what he had just agreed to.

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The Wedding That Wasn't

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Sadie made her way onto the stage and Kwest handed her the mike before going back to his soundboard. E.J. had been tranquilized with Valium after Kwest had told her the news so it was apparently up to Sadie to tell the rest of the world what was going on. Kwest still could not believe the woman had attacked him and Georgia had had to pull her off. Kwest just hoped Sadie was worth all this trouble and then thought she was as he watched her. Unlike her sister the spotlight had never bothered Sadie, in fact she basked in it. She stood up there, looking beautiful in a blue satin strapless Dior that her sister had bought for her as a maid of honor present, her bridesmaid dress having been commandeered by SME. Kwest stopped the music that had been playing and some eyes were drawn to the stage.

"Everyone if I could please have your attention." When she saw the guests focused on her she continued. " Thank you for coming. Jude and Tommy appreciate everyone making the time to be here to celebrate their wedding. I know some of you have traveled a long way. Unfortunately.... the wedding will not be taking place here today..." There was immediate an immediate buzz coming from all the guests. There had been hints that something wasn't right, probably brought on by the fact that Jude's band was wearing the bridesmaids dresses. And the fact that no one had been able to confirm any sightings of the bride or groom.

"I knew it! Tommy couldn't do it!" Jamie said almost triumphantly as he took another drink from his champagne glass. Kat punched him in the arm, hard. "Ow! What was that for?!"

"You dope. If you had gone to the bachelor party you would have known."

"Known what?" Their attention was drawn back to Sadie as she spoke again.

"Everyone if I can have your attention on the screen please. Everything will be clear in just a second." Sadie's voice carried through the grounds of the estate. Sadie tapped the laptop in front of her and wedding pictures of Tommy and Jude appeared on the movie screen. The crowd got even louder. The media in the crowd all had their cell phones out to call their respective work places to leak the news.

"Ohmygod! That's my dress!" Kat shouted as she hit Jamie's arm repeatedly. Although Jude had told Kat about E.J. insisting her wedding dress be designer, she had loved Kat's design so much she had wanted it made anyway. Jude had promised she would wear it to the reception and after the initial disappointment faded, Kat was okay with the idea. Jamie watched the changing pictures, noticing every detail. The quality wasn't great having been snapped on Jude's phone, but they were beautiful nonetheless. The most important thing was how happy his oldest friend looked. _He_ was the one that brought that out in her.

"They just sent these to me." Sadie raised her glass of champagne. "To Tommy and Jude!" Everyone there had been supplied with, by the many servers, with champagne and they all saluted the couple. Jamie raised his own glass, and finally accepted Jude's choice. "Oh and Tommy said to have a kick ass party on them." Sadie added, bringing cheers from the younger people in the crowd. SME got on stage in their dresses and set up, starting the party off. Soon some of the guests who were musicians joined them to jam and E! News definitely got a story worth paying for even if the main attraction was missing. There were enough celebrities there to make up for the upset.

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Where They Were

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Okay so Elvis never made it to their wedding, but it was quiet and simple just like Jude had wanted from the very beginning, after she had accepted that she did want to marry Tommy anyway. They stood on the rooftop garden of the Bellagio Hotel in dappled afternoon sunlight under a trellis with roses growing twined around it. The gold and silver threads Kat had sewn into Jude's strapless dress glinted prettily and a light breeze brushed the curls that had been pulled back from her face. She held a simple bouquet of Calla Lilies and Tommy looked amazing in his tux. The only witnesses present were a hotel clerk, a photographer and the minister who would be marrying them.

There were no nerves or second thoughts, just a serenity that came from knowing that this was meant to be. When the minister had completed the words that bound them together Tommy took her hand and slid the platinum band onto her finger as he stared into her eyes. She did the same without looking away, caught in every little thing his eyes told her. When he leaned down and took her mouth, she tasted forever in his kiss. And she wondered who she was to ever think she could have fought this. Her arms wrapped tight around his neck, as his held her around the waist, pulling her off her high heels.

Tommy had always been good at undressing her, so she knew he was being purposefully slow as he slipped every button out of its hole on the back of her dress. He counted softly as his lips caressed every bit of flesh that was exposed as he took care of another little pearl button. She shivered in anticipation, but he would not quicken his pace and if she said anything he would win this game. Marriage had to start off on the right footing right? When the dress was finally loose around her waist he had counted twenty five seed pearl buttons. She turned to him and started her own little torment, letting her cleavage press against the white bustier as she leaned over to undo his bowtie and then start on his shirt buttons. She was careful to let her knuckles slide against his bare chest as she took even longer than he had to get rid of his shirt. Her mouth played along his hard chest and his fingers fisted in her hair. She reached for the bottle on the floor by the bed and poured a trickle of golden liquid onto his chest. He flinched from the sudden coldness, but just as soon heated up by her mouth drinking in the champagne. She did not miss a drop, especially where it spilled onto his lower body. She had not removed his pants yet, so when her tongue ran underneath his waistband he had to fight the urge to come right then.

When they finally undressed each other completely Jude's flesh practically hummed with anticipation and Tommy felt like he had been hard for days, but he would not rush this. He sank into her slowly as his mouth claimed hers. They were tangled together among the Egyptian cotton sheets and enjoying every movement of the other no matter how small. Every gasp and every meeting of the hips sent tremors through their bodies.

He looked deep into her eyes as he pushed further into her, their ragged breaths in sync. He brushed the sweaty hair from her face and tasted the sweet alcohol on her lips.

"I never thought I'd sleep with a married woman again." He said as he sank into her, only to pull out achingly slow, letting her feel every inch of him stretching her open.

"I never thought I'd sleep with a married man, ever." He growled and drew her closer, so they pressed chest to chest.

"No one but me Jude."

"No one but you." She agreed and pulled his head down to kiss her. The pressure in her lower body built slowly, but that made it so much stronger when she came on a cry and dragged him down with her.

He finally lifted his head from her still heavily beating heart, to stare into her beautiful eyes.

"I love you Mrs. Quincy." She smiled at the unfamiliar name. He linked his fingers through hers and she wondered again who she thought she was to fight destiny. Especially when he looked at her like that and loved her like this.


End file.
